


Tangled Threads

by culpaeros (electriicl0ve), Rukazaya



Category: Durarara!!
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Biting, Blow Jobs, Cheating, Dirty Talk, Dubcon or Noncon Moirallegiance, Dubious Consent, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Explicit Sexual Content, Finger Sucking, Fuckbuddies, Hand Jobs, Host Clubs, Hurt/Comfort, Love Triangles, Love/Hate, M/M, Marking, Multi, Oral Sex, Porn With Plot, Public Sex, Rough Sex, Sex Toys, Sexual Tension, Sexy Times, Snowballing, Threesome, Threesome - M/M/M, Unrequited Love, Unresolved Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-02
Updated: 2017-06-18
Packaged: 2018-05-04 12:21:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 13
Words: 75,069
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5333918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/electriicl0ve/pseuds/culpaeros, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rukazaya/pseuds/Rukazaya
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was suppose to be a business relationship when Izaya approached Delic, Shizuo's cousin, to be his freelance information gatherer. But Izaya should have known things could never go as planned with monsters like them as Delic and Shizuo both get into a twisted love triangle with Izaya.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's note: THIS IS A REPOSTED FANFIC because I accidentally deleted the older one ;_____; please help out by leaving kudos and reviews again. I'm so sorry and thank you so much.

**Title:**  Tangled Threads  
**Rating:**  M  
**Pairing:**  Delic x Izaya, Shizuo x Izaya  
**Prompt from the Drrr Kink Meme:**  
"Got this idea from "Demonstration" and "Natural Orders be Damned" (Love those fics!)  
Delic is a host and his host name is 'Delic.' (Maybe he has a japanese name but he gave it up) He's Shizuo's cousin who looks a LOT like him.  
Somehow he falls for Orihara Izaya, his cousin's enemy. i'll leave that up to the author... maybe it's because izaya's just that damn sexy and smart? and understanding. (or at least he pretends to be)  
At first Izaya goes along with it thinking he could use Delic to his advantage against Shizuo or something. Slowly he too starts falling for Delic's advances.  
Up to the author if the author wants to include jealous Shizuo, but not necessary.  
Also up to the author of the final pairing, either Delic x Izaya or Shizuo x Izaya.  
Mostly I want to see suave Delic wooing Izaya, taking him to nice restaurants, elitist parties, Delic having good connections, getting information from the wives of political members etc. Delic and Izaya are both rich so I can see both of them having refined tastes. Delic spoiling Izaya.  
And a LOT of groping and smut! (I can't think of a plot for this so sorry. I hope the author can? I just want to see more Deliczaya~)

 **Disclaimer:**  I own none of these characters!

_THIS STORY CONTAINS MALExMALE RELATIONSHIPS. You have been warned._

**_SPOILER/TRIGGER WARNING:_ ** _This fanfic has Non-con elements. Thank you._

 **Quick author's note:**  
_This is a fanfic with two authors, Rukawagf and Culpaeros. Thank you!_

* * *

**_Chapter 1_ **

* * *

_"A man can be happy with any woman, as long as he does not love her."_  - Oscar Wilde

* * *

Shinjuku.

One of 23 city wards located within Tokyo, Japan,

Starless skies too busy drowning in neon lights, a buzzing metropolis and iconic entertainment and business center for foreigners and natives alike.

It was a city filled with restless people.

A city that never slept.

And tucked in between the hustle and bustle of this busy city was one street filled with handsome men in suits, many calling in their clients for a good time; sharing promises of one night they would never forget with each beckon. The scent of sex and alcohol lingered in the air within the building - the scents only flooded out by the distracting reverberation of laughter, the echo of intoxicatingly saccharine vulgarities and the twinkle of various women's wickedly perverted giggles from farther within the club. In the main room, bright glittering lights from the chandelier twinkled as the leading host poured the pyramid of champagne, each glass spilling down into the next like a trickling waterfall as the clients and other hosts cheer and danced the night away. Some couples were hidden in their booths, exchanging expensive glasses between lips and hands, as well as several secret furtive caresses and whispers of less elegant promises that would expire with the rising of the morning's sun. It was just one of many host clubs - the establishment gaudy, perfumed and corrupted with all the magical illusion of the night.

But it was this particular one that an informant named "Orihara Izaya" had chosen to spend his night. For this host club was where the infamous Delic held his stage as Tokyo's number one host. But 'Delic', as he had chosen to be called, was actually a fictitious name for a fictitious identity adopted in an effort to give up his birth name and the weight of his many past failures that have since come to be associated with it. Thanks to that the boy he had once been evolved into a man who had managed to shed his past skin as if it were nothing more than a dispensable cocoon, moving forward in a new, far more glamorous lifestyle of charming women with the magic dust that fell from his feathery wings like a pale moth hidden within the night.

But even a moth as mesmerizing as he was could never be as dazzling as the butterfly. Like how the moon's glow paled when exposed to the sun's brilliant light, it was all just the façade of a man who was everything a gentleman should be but who could never be more than he was - a fake.

 _Delic for Delicious_.

It was an interesting choice of name, without a doubt.

One who could entice others. A man that with just one lick, one taste, was able to drive all women who came to him wild for more. A perfect choice of name for the man who had risen to become the number one host in Tokyo seemingly overnight.

But it wasn't for his towering reputation or for his charismatic company that Orihara Izaya had been enticed to visit him in this Heaven of Desires, or rather this  _Haven of Desires._ No human had ever held that sort of power on the infamous informant of Shinjuku.

Well, no one considered to be 'human' by  _his_  definition, anyhow.

No, rather it was for business that Izaya visited, although the host in question did not yet know of this.

When the informant stepped into the establishment, the front desk clerk looked a bit startled. The man hesitated to inform Izaya that only women were allowed to book reservations, yet Orihara did not blink an eye at the stammered apology and instead calmly explained that he should check the reservation under "Nakura" as he was pretty sure that his name had been approved. The young man checked through his computer list and sure enough, to his astonishment, the name "Nakura" had been approved somehow by his supervisors. The young host tilted his head in confusion but went ahead and led the way inside the dazzling interior filled with music, sparkling lights and scandalous giggles and laughter.

He was led to the top floor where the VIP room overlooked the stage. The clerk knocked on the door and went inside first while the informant waited. Izaya could just barely make out the furtive whispers of his guide as he explained the peculiarity of the situation to the awaiting host inside.

"It's just-…This new client…is…male."

Izaya couldn't help but smirk then when he heard the host's words reply to this with an unhesitatingly clear voice, "Oh~? In that case show  _him_  in. It's rude to keep a client waiting, you know."

His guide walked back out, even more confused, as their establishment had never before had a male client in all the three years he had worked here. But he bowed and let the informant inside before respectfully closing the door behind him.

The room was filled with roses, a scent that flooded Izaya's senses as soon as he walked in. A spacious leather couch lined up against the walls, the black color a vivid contrast to the white walls surrounding it all save for the very back one which held a one-sided glass so that the people partying below could not see in but he could still see out. And standing in the middle of it all was the young blond host wearing an easy smile to accompany his white suit and pink pinstriped shirt as he held out a single pink rose that perfectly matched his pink shades. The scene was truly picture perfect, as if it were right out of a movie.

"Nakura-san, I presume?" The blond walked over then, his movements carefully timed as though he had wanted to give Izaya a chance to take it all in. His gait was confident but not aggressive, the male still taking his time to prevent Izaya from being overwhelmed. In reply, however, Izaya merely nodded in confirmation.

"May I take your coat?" he continued. His long graceful fingers held onto the shoulders of Izaya's jacket for permission first before sliding the coat off of the informant. Though Izaya wasn't quite used to being treated in such manner, he didn't decline as this was often the normal etiquette for a host and his client. Instead, Izaya merely went ahead and sat down as the host hung his coat on the nearby rack. The informant could feel his body sink instantly into the luxurious soft leather as if its sole purpose of creation was to cushion away all the stress and burden of its occupants..

Unconsciously, Izaya looked behind him to stare down below. It was a sight to behold, a truly VIP seat. Izaya wouldn't mind enjoying this view more where he could watch his beloved humans in all their dirty, disgusting glory as they sank further into corruption and temptation all at once…

"Normally my clients can't take their eyes off of me, you know, Nakura-san."

Izaya turned to face the man speaking but instead of seeing the other's face in front of his eyes was that single rose, the petals delicately colored in soft baby pink.

"I had thought that perhaps I could place this in your breast pocket or in your hair but…" The blond's eyes seemed to shimmer with amusement as he realized that Izaya's coat and shirt obviously had no pockets. "I must say, this is my first time where I am not sure if my client would accept my gift."

"And why wouldn't I want to? Because I'm a man?" Izaya smirked quizzically as his hand half reached delicately for the rose.

"Forgive me if that's what I seemed to imply, Nakura-san, but it's really more due to my own realization that a red rose would have been more suitable for you. I had thought you might be dissatisfied with this pink one, so I'll be sure to choose a more appropriate one next time the chance arises. For now, though, I hope you'll do me the honor of accepting this rose? "

Izaya blinked.

This man was…

_smooth as silk._

Izaya could tell instantly that such charm would work wonders on many common women.

The shock flickered away within half a second, though, before Izaya managed to place his mask back on when he grinned like a Cheshire cat, his own ruby eyes twinkling as he accepted the traditional flower gift that Delic must give to all his clients.

"Clever, host-san. But flatteries don't work on me." Izaya placed the rose on the table as he flipped his phone on to go over their negotiation. "Now then, about the business at ha-" The host suddenly sat next to him.  _Too close_  for the informant's comfort as the side of their legs brushed against each other.

Delic just grinned innocently, though, his face way too near to Izaya's as he leaned forward with a smile like that of an overeager schoolboy. Izaya ignored him, however, trying to remain 'professional' even now, "Ahem. So as promised, I'm here. Nakura-san in the flesh just as you requested. Now then, your part of the deal was to give me that information I require?"

There was a knowing smile on the host's lips, unperturbed by the informant's blunt and direct words.

"I do believe I have at least an hour with you, Informant-san, and I'm sure we both know that if I tell you what it is you want to know right now, then I will have no guarantee of you staying for the entirety of it."

The host's words were just as direct as Izaya's and perhaps even bolder as he gazed the informant up and down from behind his rose colored shades as if the raven petit man was a delectable cake he was eager to get into.

"Isn't that right?"

Izaya leaned back into the couch in an almost off-hand manner at those words, pretending to weigh the matter. But, in truth, he had no choice other than to agree. He needed this information very badly, but he could not let the host know that.

Their 'business deals' had not been going on for very long.. It had been only four months perhaps since Izaya had first reached out to Delic via email. He was, of course, very hesitant to use Delic - as he was Heiwajima Shizuo's cousin (amongst other reasons) - but that first time there had been information Izaya had to have and he knew that only Delic could provide it for him smoothly without causing unwanted attention. Back then, he had just needed to know if a certain politician's wife would visit him the following Monday. If she was, then the politician would be using that time to go out and conduct a certain deal behind her back that Izaya needed to know for another client of his.

Of course, Delic had flat out refused to cooperate back then, as his client's privacy came first and foremost, but eventually Izaya's persistence paid off thanks to the reassurance he had given Delic that the acquired information would not 'harm' Delic's clients in any way.

After all, what they were after wasn't the politician himself or his wife, but the yakuza that would benefit from that deal. Shiki, the kanbu from the yakuza of Awakusu-kai just wanted to offer a 'better' deal than their rivals and cut the negotiation off before it happened.

With enough money and reassurance concerning the harmless nature of the information provided by simply asking 'when' certain clients were booking him at the beginning, Izaya was able to win Delic over little by little. Especially since, over time, many of the ladies did come back to Delic with the 'good news of their great fortune,' as Izaya led him into believing he was delivering some of the clients even more money than they had before… when really it was the Awakusu-kai and Izaya's other clients who were filling their own pockets.

The number one host continued to accept small jobs after that. Izaya had thought that things were going well between them when suddenly, just as a need for crucial information arose that Izaya needed to provide his client with in twenty-four hours, Delic refused him. Or rather, he refused to provide it unless one condition was met: that 'Nakura-san' come visit him - face to face - at his booth at the appointed time. Delic promised to provide the information he sought then and would not budge on this negotiation.

"Alright, one hour." What else could Izaya say? He only had a few more hours before his client's deadline and was now left with no other alternative source for this information.

"So what have you got to drink? Any suggestions Delic-san? I can call you that, I hope? Host-san sounds so stuffy. "

"You can call me whatever you want, sweetheart." The host smiled warmly before getting up to place an order for their drinks. Izaya's eyes flickered, almost wanting to desperately run away as Shizuo's face smiled back at him with that creepily unnatural expression that had never surfaced before in the presence of Orihara Izaya.

But this wasn't Heiwajima Shizuo, Izaya reminded himself. And yet that had been the second reason why Izaya had wanted to avoid dealing with this man, especially face to face, for so long.

Because Delic, being a true cousin to Orihara Izaya's dearest enemy, held an uncannily identical resemblance to Heiwajima Shizuo.

And seeing the face that had always been perpetually and demonically angry before show such a benign smile was not only unnaturally creepy to Orihara Izaya but, it made Izaya feel like he-

"Heh~ So I can call you 'my little pet' if I wanted to?" Izaya smirked and changed his train of thought before he could continue down that dangerous road.

"By all means~" Delic spread his arms out and shrugged, placing his orders through the phone in his booth, before sitting back down next to 'Nakura-san' again. "In return, though, I expect you to tell me your real name,  _Informant-san._ "

Izaya paused from speaking his refute at that request. He had been about to jab at the host for being such a masochist, but slowly the informant was figuring out what Delic's true intentions were for calling him out.

Ah, so Delic had wanted  _his_  information as well?

True, Izaya had kept their negotiations strictly to business. He had not told Delic his real name either in case Shizuo had ranted to his cousin about him before. Although Izaya knew that was probably not possible, since Shizuo and Delic didn't seem to be in a close relationship, the informant still wanted to be careful as it was a rather well known fact in Ikebukuro after all that he and Heiwajima Shizuo were not on the best of terms.

He did not want to ruin his chance at obtaining perhaps one of the best freelance information gatherers for the most rich and influential women in Tokyo after all. Delic was a diamond mine of information for a broker.

But to think that… this man was intelligent enough to realize that Izaya wasn't using his real name… his intuition was uncanny to say the least.

At his silence though Delic didn't waver. "Or else I'll be forced to guess your name like how I used to guess what you looked like based on your emails. And - I must say - after how that went, I wouldn't bet on my guesses being close to accuracy."

"Heh~ so your guesses on my appearance were incorrect I take it?" Izaya played along, his fingers lightly twirling the stem of the rose he was given. "What did you expect of me? An older man? A young woman?"

"Actually I was expecting a potbellied, balding man. I'm relieved to find I was wrong", the host had the gall to wink at that and Izaya felt himself snort before bursting out in laughter at the silly image conjured in his head.

"Ahahaha…! Well, I'm glad I exceeded your expectations in that regard. I'm not interested in growing bald any time soon, thank you very much." Izaya giggled, relaxing back onto the couch now.

This man really was amazingly skilled.

Earlier Izaya had been tense and ready to brace himself with a mental wall when the host began to ask him personal questions. But Delic had already smoothly reversed it and made the informant laugh and relax around him.

However, it wouldn't completely work on Orihara Izaya like it did on Delic's other clients. He knew all the tricks that the host was throwing at him since these were things that he himself has done to many silly girls in the past.

"What did you order?" Izaya asked curiously instead, smoothly changing the topic at hand.

Delic placed a finger on his lips at that as if to mime a secret.

"A surprise."

"What if I don't like it?" Izaya frowned softly as if he actually cared when he didn't. Two can play this game, after all.

"I tend to like surprises, don't you?"

"Heh~ Only as long as I can take part in them. Is it a drink you think I would like, Delic-san?"

"If it isn't, I would be a poor host, Informant-san."

"Such confidence…" Izaya whispered amusedly as he couldn't help but find himself staring into those pink sparkling eyes hidden behind his shades of a color opposite of Shizuo's.

"Speaking of things we like, are you unsatisfied with my payment, Delic-san?" Izaya quickly changed the topic back to his interest as the chance arose. They had an hour, but Delic never said they couldn't talk about business for the entire time.

"Not really." Delic sat back and shrugged nonchalantly in that vague manner of his that was slowly starting to frustrate the informant. "But you already knew that, didn't you?"

"Perhaps," Izaya responded flippantly back. If Delic wanted to continue this charade, he could too after all. "Now then, with that on the table, what is it that you truly want instead? Was seeing my face not enough?"

There was a pause that confused Izaya. Delic was regarding him carefully and that made Izaya nervous. It wasn't as menacing as Shiki-san's, but it was still as if a bird of prey was gazing down at him.

"What if I said I want you, Informant-san?"

"E-excuse me?" Izaya did not mean to stutter but he almost choked on his words. Did he want him as a personal assistant? Some information from him? Or… did he really mean it the way it sounded like right now...

"That only sounds fair, doesn't it?" Delic smiled again and it only unnerved Izaya more. No, no he didn't get why it was only 'fair'.

"That's hard to believe considering you made the call before knowing what I looked like~ That and you believed I was a potbellied, balding man." Izaya could feel his eyebrows twitch at seeing the host's grin that clearly said 'I don't see how it's hard to believe' without actually having to speak and interrupt him.

" _Unless_  that  _is_ your type, Delic-san. But you had said you were glad you were wrong."

"I guess you can say, back then, I had only felt it fair that I know your face as well as you seemed to know mine."

There was another brief pause as the waiter finally returned with their drinks – the male handing it first to the host to inspect – before walking away again without a word.

"And the fact that I found I actually like it only makes me want to know it in more detail now. Thus why I have decided that I should probably withhold my information just a bit longer than you probably expected."

There was an unspoken threat that hung in the air between them that was clear as day even to Izaya. Delic poured him a glass and set the drink before him with a smile so innocent it would have put kittens to shame. But the look didn't remain long, or rather, it began to counter Delic's actions when he decided to push the boundaries again. Without speaking, he leaned even closer this time, bringing their faces a mere inch apart - while Izaya stared up at him with a glare that could kill.

"Flatteries don't get you anywhere Sh- Delic-san."

Izaya bit his lips. When Delic moved his face so close, his vision blurred and Izaya had seen Shizuo in front of him for that split second. His heart pounded fast at that innocent sounding mistake. But he couldn't let the host know that he-

Delic's fuschia eyes glanced at Izaya's fingers that had nervously tensed up on the glass on the table, then looked back at the informant triumphantly.

"Ah~ But that's where you are wrong, Informant-san."

Oh, good, Izaya had thought. He had  _not_  yet noticed that the informant had slipped and almost accidentally called him-

"Flattery gets you everywhere."

Izaya froze as a hand softly caressed his cheek and playfully twirled with his side bangs as those rose colored eyes gently captured him. In that instant, even a skilled socialite as Orihara Izaya could not move, the male bound under the number one host's magic spell cast upon him by those soft kissable lips that held unspoken promises and those ever-knowing eyes that seemed to offer both vows of fulfillment and pleasure beyond anyone's dreams. If the host had wanted to, Izaya wouldn't be able to refuse him at all as that gentle fingertip both innocently and yet devilishly slid down Izaya's cheek and fell with a lingering ghostly touch remaining upon his face.

"And that's why they call me number one."

Izaya could feel two hands slide down to his sides and rest at his hips. Delic leaned forward even more to further close the distance between them so that he could brush his lips against the informant's ear.

"Because you can't ever turn me off."

A shudder rippled its way through Izaya's body at such a seductive allure and shock pulsated through the both of them when he suddenly pushed the host violently to effectively break away from the snake's charm that the small physical contact between ear and lips had cast upon him. Izaya panicked as he quickly stood up then to put as much distance between them as possible. He got his expression under control as quickly as possible, thanks to all his years of experience, as he swiftly patched his expression back into one of superiority.

"Alright Delic-san, either way, your payment. If money isn't what you wish for, what is it that you really want. Come now, you can't mean you want me, seriously. "

"But I do, Informant-san." Delic smiled as he placed his head down onto his arms where they had fallen to rest on the headboard of the sofa by the glass wall. "You've managed to intrigue me."

"All I ask for is one hour of your time. And each time you want me to report from now on, I'll only tell you the information here at my booth. So your payment will henceforth be to spend time with me."

Delic grinned innocently again like that of a mischievous schoolboy. "I only wish for us to get to know each other better, after all."

Why this little sneak…

Izaya's smile twitched at the corners as he tried hard to remain professional while inwardly he wanted to strangle this man.

But the thing was, he had no choice once more.

It had been only twenty minutes and he STILL needed that information by tonight. If he refused Delic this deal, what guarantee did he have that the host would still provide him with what he came for?

Izaya sighed and plopped down onto the couch, as far away from Delic as possible as he placed his arms on the headboard of the sofa too to look out over his beloved humans falling into depravity and further into debauchery.

Honestly, the view wasn't bad.

"Alright. It's a deal."

"However," Izaya added as he faced Delic who clearly looked as if he was to jump in triumphant jubilation, "no touching."

"Oh, well in that case our deal can't work out then," Delic shrugged and leaned back as if that was that.

"... Wait, why?"

"I did tell you I wanted you  _here_ , didn't I?" Delic asked, his voice almost genuine in his uncertainty as if he had forgotten if he had or had not told Izaya that while he cocked his head to the side and stared at the client. "Since you'll be coming here, you'll be my client and a host-client relationship isn't limited to simple discourse. Of course, with most clients, sex is off limits during working hours so you don't have to worry too much about that, Informant-san. But the price of physical exchanges will change depending upon what information you desire."

Izaya felt cold as his body stiffened up. Delic was requiring… physical intimacy.

He swallowed hard as he looked down below at his humans partying the night away. It all felt distant, the noise muted through the glass wall.

He never had to stoop so low as to sell himself for information before. Money or even blackmail was enough. Blackmailing was tempting even now but… he wanted to continue to use Delic's services. The host literally was a diamond mine of information… and sure he could own him through dirtier means but… blackmail relationships never last long. Delic would find a way to overcome it.

That and… if Shizuo found out, Izaya could be in serious trouble.

Izaya sighed softly. What was it all for anyway? There was no real reason to not sell his body, right? All it would do was damage his pride… which he could swallow if necessary.

Or so he tried to convince himself.

"I… I'll concede to dates… and such," Izaya heard himself say as he looked out the window, avoiding Delic's intense gaze. "But there are rules."

Izaya turned to look at Delic with serious, determined eyes.

"No kissing. And I mean it. You can touch me however you want. But I don't want you kissing my lips."

"Does that mean I can kiss anywhere but your lips?"

Izaya noticed a teasing note in Delic's voice as if he had just caught onto something the informant was hiding.

"Ah… sure." Izaya hurriedly continued to add the ground rules. Delic had said sex wasn't necessary, but he had a fair idea what other things Delic had in mind if he thought he could kiss him in 'other places.'

"Anyways. There are a few rules. Like I said, no kissing. And no penetrating. Also, you can't order me around. Such as asking me to do something beyond my comfort level or our deals. None of that. You just tell me positions and how... you want it and I'll decide if it's okay." Izaya hoped he covered almost everything.

"...Fine, I won't order you into doing something as long as you are aware that I have to be satisfied with the payment in order for it to count."

"If you ejaculate, you must agree that you have been satisfied." Izaya cringed a bit at his word choice but he had to be very specific and clear.

"I can...agree with that." The host reached forward, hand brushing against Izaya's cheek as he pressed his forehead against the other male's.

"However...there is one more thing I would like to negotiate before the deal can be complete."

Izaya shivered as he noticed Delic's rose colored orbs focus on his eyes before trailing down to his lips.

"My signing bonus."

"... N-negotiate your signing bonus?"

Izaya felt his nervousness transfer to his voice no matter how much he didn't want it to. The more he kept saying he didn't want kissing, it only made it more transparent what things he wanted to hide. But it was important to him. Even if it was clear as day to Delic, it was still important to Izaya to remain firm on this.

"I… I said, no kissing."

"How do you think I seal all my deals, Informant-san?" Delic teased.

"Only one kiss then."

Izaya's eyes flickered as an idea hit him.

"Fine."

And before Delic could react Izaya pushed up and…

….kissed him on his forehead. Then he pulled back with a smirk as he let the action sink in for Delic.

"Done."

Delic paused at that, a bit started at everything that had happened, before suddenly bursting out in laughter, "Ahaha, you cheated, Informant-san. Now you owe me two kisses."

Izaya shrugged nonchalantly with a smile, "You didn't specify where~ to kiss you. So it's still a deal~~~"

"In that case I'll allow it. However, I also didn't specify who was kissing who."

"Eh? But…" Izaya slid back a bit, instantly wary at those words. He  _had_  kissed him right? Wasn't that enou-

But already Delic was leaning forward, his arms wrapping behind Izaya's neck and trapping him between the host and the couch just as Delic's lips pressed down softly right beside Izaya's. The informant could feel the heat rising to his cheek at such a seductive yet sweet missed kiss that felt even more intimate than a real one would have been. Involuntarily, a hand moved to cover his mouth even though his lips were not violated as he looked away with a flush he could not keep down. Delic's entire expression seemed to glow in pleasure at the informant's reaction.

"Well, it's been an hour, and… I believe you still owe me my information." Swallowing down his nervousness Izaya pushed lightly at Delic, forcing the host to move to the side so Izaya could get up and out of the intimate situation..

"Ah, has it been an hour already? You haven't even touched your wine." Delic stood as well at that, but he didn't move to follow Izaya. Instead, the cordial host was moving to get Izaya's coat so that he could help the informant back into it. The informant in return couldn't help but frown at being doted on like that, but it seemed at least Delic was letting him go.

"I can try it at another time." The wine was the least of his worries.

After helping Izaya into his coat, Delic produced for him a folded piece of paper from his own jacket pocket that held the information the informant had come for. Without much courtesy, Izaya grabbed at it before turning to leave. Delic had used up all of his patience at this point.

Despite Izaya's rude behavior, however, the host remained amicable as he smiled and bid him farewell.

"Until next time, Informant-san," the host had said as he watched him leave from his room's doorway - his words serving as a reminder that, sooner or later, the informant would come to see him again.

* * *

**Author's Note: (originally posted on December 24, 2014)**

**Rukawagf:**  Merry Christmas! I was thinking of waiting until Catnip was done before posting this but I wanted a fic that's a bit easier to write while I work on the final chapters of some of my fics ^^; Thank you for still waiting on my other fic updates. This fic will be updated a bit slower while I work on some of others but I really wanted to post Delic x Izaya fic that's been in my head for about 4 years now. I hope you guys enjoy.

 **Culpaeros:**  Hi guys! This has been a fic long in the making and we are excited to finally get started on it. Thank you for any and all of your support!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's note: 
> 
> Ruka: THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING!!! But I've said before, this is a repost because I'm a goofball and I've accidentally clicked 'delete work' instead of adding new chapter. So please, I'd truly love it if you can leave reviews each chapter if you don't mind. Or at least the last chapter. i'm in all kind of pain that I've just lost ALL my precious reviews that I REALLY loved reading and re-reading... and RE-RE-read cuz i LOVED them so much, on rainy days i'd go back and read them so please pleeeeeease.... i'm begging you to leave me reviews ;____; and kudos. I'd much appreciate it sob... thank you.
> 
> Amee: Hello, second author here! Omg we accidentally deleted the fic, but the good news is those who keep wishing they could leave more then one kudos.... Here's your chance lol!! Thanks for the re-read guys~


	2. Chapter 2

" _It is absurd to divide people into good and bad. People are either charming or tedious_." - by Oscar Wilde

* * *

Even the most opulent life style could get dull when indulged to the point of debauchery. Or perhaps it was because it had been so extravagant that, after being immersed in every single sin possible, everything soon turned tasteless and boring.

Such was the life that surrounded the number one host of Tokyo, Delic. He was there to entertain the ladies who had become bored out of their minds, the women who, having long become trapped in a world where their desires came too easily fulfilled, were looking for new entertainment. It had been a fun challenge, at first, finding new ways to amuse the women, but now it was dragging Delic down with them too as the neverending infinite amount of pleasure and limitless sensuality began to make him feel the same lack of fulfillment.

However, Delic was a glutton for the sinful pleasures and, despite the lack of fulfillment, he still enjoyed his new life no matter how often the loop of repeating depravity circled around.

In relation to "Nakura", Delic knew it wouldn't be long until "Nakura" would come back to the host for new information. Delic was a resourceful man, after all, and that resourcefulness had been one of the many reasons as to why he had found new ways to entertain the bored ladies and rekindle their desires, even if what he presented them was really all the same present wrapped in different paper. And, just as he was able to find new ways to entertain the ladies, he was now finding new ways to humor himself.

And at this moment that 'new form of entertainment' was this informant.

It had certainly been a big surprise to find that the man who had taken every precaution available to hide his identity from Delic was such a handsome guy. The most captivating part of him had been, perhaps, those deep russet eyes which had been set in an almost permanently bemused expression upon the male's angular face - as though the informant was constantly toying with his host. The look had piqued Delic's interest, had ensnared him in the challenge presented to gain the upper hand against "Nakura" or else risk being caught within the informant's games. For especially the intelligence presented to him, however briefly, within those games couldn't have been faked. After all, many a woman had sat in the same exact seat and in an effort to appear superior to all of Delic's other clients would try to play with him by speaking of things they did not fully understand. But, in contrast to their ignorant banter, "Nakura" had restrained himself from trivial conversational teasings. Rather than seeking to impress Delic with his intelligence he had used his intelligence against him, like that intelligence was his claws and Delic his captured prey. It had stirred something akin to excitement within the blond and he found himself unable to resist pushing further to see just how far those claws could extend.

But "Nakura" had refused.

Just like a true feline "Nakura" knew when to choose his battles. He had played into Delic's hand only for his own benefits, all the while knowing that the host - however beneficial - was unnecessary. And the thought of being able to continue playing this game after having been 'allowed' to win the small match thrilled Delic. Somehow, he had decided, he would gain this kitten's affections and through it find the entertainment he so desperately sought.

It would be fun, he told himself over and over as he looked forward to their next 'session.' The host even began to purposefully keep his 'last' appointment times open in case "Nakura" needed to book him in a hurry.

The informant would need him again soon. It was simply a waiting game now until he would resurface. And, needless to say, Delic was more than pleased when this game finally ended in his favor.

This "Nakura", as the informant called himself, knew too well that no one else could unlock the secrets to a women's heart as easily and as smoothly as Delic could. The blond was capable of stealing inside and leaving again without leaving so much as a hint that he had been the burglar who had pocketed the jewel kept locked within her heart.

And just within the month since their first meeting, "Nakura" had booked yet another appointment with the host to gain that key.

Delic was humming to himself and the ladies who had booked him that day noticed how happy he was, one of the more intuitive ones even slyly asking if he was thinking of his next appointment instead of her. Of course, he had refused such a scandalous accusation and immediately poured his attention upon her until she felt his adoration within her very soul but, deep inside himself, it wasn't her Delic was truly thinking of but rather it was his last appointment of that day.

This time Delic had specifically ordered a red rose in the exact shade of Nakura's peculiar eyes. It had haunted him since Nakura's last visit, afterall. He had been anxious for weeks over the fact that it was so difficult to find a rose as red as those eyes. But it wasn't the color that had been the reason for his charm, rather it had been that despite being the windows to his very soul, Delic had been unable to ascertain what was hidden behind that playful red.

And those eyes had hidden so much from him.

All he was ever able to see behind the bemusement were the complicated flickers of emotions that hinted at a conflicting chaos and inner turmoil that did not match his handsome nonchalant mask… Delic couldn't help but want to tear down the walls and remove the mask so as to finally see Nakura's real face hidden beneath now.

Wearing his most charming smile, Delic waited as the door opened and "Nakura-san" was led inside. As usual, the host took his jacket to hang and handed the raven male his new red rose. Feeling a sense of smugness settle upon him Delic then watched as those vibrant eyes frowned ever-so-briefly before the displeasure vanished in a casual smile as Nakura accepted the rose that the host had taken so many pains to obtain.

But then it was Delic's turn to frown internally.

After all, all the blond had wanted was to see this man's real smile.

For now, he supposed, he would have to be satisfied with having noticed Nakura's eyes flicker for that one split second since it had been such a quick switch of emotion that it could have been easily missed had he not been so carefully looking.

Just like last time Nakura went straight towards the reverse mirror to look out beyond the glass. At such obvious dismissal of Delic's gift the host couldn't help but feel his own eyes flicker in annoyance. What was so interesting about the people down below? How could they be more interesting than 'him'? The man that all women paid enormous amount of money to spend just an hour with?

"I hope you will try the wine this time," Pressing his annoyance down Delic casually started the conversation as he knew by now that the man was probably avoiding him. Perhaps it was because this 'exchange' was unnerving for Nakura-san and Delic wished to have him more relaxed. Teasing or not, it was never fun if the other party absolutely detested him after all.

"Ah…" was all Nakura said as he looked out still, a small smile on his lips. Delic sat next to him, the couch sinking and the informant slightly leaning towards him due to gravity's pull.

Using his chance, Delic wrapped his arm around the informant and pulled the man into his lap.

"I'm going to be jealous if you ignore me for the guests below, informant-san."

Delic refused to call him "Nakura" if he could help it. He knew that couldn't be this man's real name.

Nakura sighed as he settled onto the host's lap. Normally women would squeal at such lascivious attention and would suggest for more and yet Nakura hinted at it being more of a bother than a privilege. Delic almost wondered if it was because Nakura was a man before promptly dismissing the idea. No, a 'straight' man's 'normal' reaction would have been to 'blush.' Besides, straight or not, Delic was pretty sure he was more than enough to convince another man to 'experiment,' but his gut feeling told him that this Nakura was actually hiding his true sexuality from him. Rather than playing the straight man as he could have, it was more as if Delic was tedious to him. And 'that' couldn't be ignored thanks to Delic's pride as the number one host.

"Alright, so what are your terms for this information?"

He was quick to get to business and still wanted to keep this formal, Delic thought. If it was strictly 'business', Nakura-san was willing to do whatever it took to reign in his inner emotions probably and it only made the host want to delve deeper into this man, to know what caused him to tick and what could make him take off that prude mask.

"So quick to get deeper into my arms, informant-san? I'm flattered." Delic teased. And there it was again, that quick flicker of annoyance. Every time Nakura's mask came off for that split second, it pleased the host.

"Mmm… how about a few kisses." Delic started off small, he didn't want the man to decide that the information he received wasn't worth it for the few physical touches after all.

"And where…?" There was a tight tension as Delic's arms felt the other male's back stiffen up nervously.

Delic looked the informant up and down hungrily, more so for the effect it had on the nervous man than for anything else.

"Your fingers…" Delic decided as he took one of Nakura's hands and kissed the back of it.

There was the flinch again as Nakura almost snapped the hand away but, perhaps due to his still tight self control, it was able to remain within Delic's grasp. The host curled his own fingers gracefully around the informant's palm then, the index finger lightly caressing the skin there before they wound around the informant's fingertips.

"Yes, I want your fingers tonight."

The informant's eyes shifted in hesitance Delic noticed. So, for now, he let the fingers go and leaned to the table to grab the glass of wine that had been prepared for the informant.

"Is that a deal?"

Instead of answering, Nakura once again looked out the window as the festivals were still high and loud down below. And, again, the host frowned. Delic could not figure out why the informant always found his window far more interesting than him. Was it because the informant was nervous and stalling? Or was there more?

So he blocked Nakura's view with the wine glass to draw his deep russet eyes back to his.

Nakura looked down and slowly nodded, taking the glass and drinking the sparkling wine without a word.

And so the deal was made.

Delic watched with twinkling eyes of amusement as Nakura's cheeks slowly flushed when the glass was lowered once more. Ah, so he was a light weight.

Even better.

"How is it? Was it as good as I promised?"

Nakura's free hand reached up at that, his delicate long fingers curling over his lips as he sampled the aftertaste within his mouth thoughtfully. Delic couldn't help but find his eyes drawn to those delicious looking fingers briefly before he was able to force himself to look back up into Nakura's eyes.

"It's not bad." Nakura smirked, knowing that his reply would irritate the host. So the informant was going to refuse to give him a satisfactory answer? Delic discovered himself hard pressed not to grin in reply as he felt himself become charmed by such a ploy.

"I had hoped it would taste like a dream," Delic sighed in feigned disappointment before he suddenly drank from the same cup where the informant's lips had been just a few seconds earlier with a mischievous expression upon his own playful face. Growing more and more bemused by this stranger Delic then watched through his rose colored shades as the informant made an expression of disapproval at the obvious second hand kiss before finally smirking in reply.

Carefully the host leaned towards the table once more then to pour them another glass of wine.

"Dip your fingers in and feed them to me." Delic commanded now as he watched the informant take ahold of the now-full glass once more.

Nakura's eyes shifted, revealing an emotion doused half in distaste and half in contemplation concerning this new situation. So far, Delic had never 'commanded' him before. But the host wanted to make sure the informant knew his position now. That it was 'he' who was in control for an hour tonight in this rose garden and not Nakura.

Obediently the informant wiped his hand with the warm, clean towelette that were provided for the guests, then dipped his long fingers into the wine then held the slim digits above Delic's lips. Slowly the host's tongue dragged under the index finger, catching the stray drops before they could fall as Delic looked down at the informant who had closed his eyes. 'Ah… he really hates this...' Delic thought as he continued to drag his tongue up and down those fingers to taste the unique combination of Nakura's skin and the wine. Above his body he could feel Nakura shuddering, the sensation stirring Delic's blood as their proximity caused him to feel every slight movement of the lighter male. This chance being given to him was far too delicious and even though he was eager for a bit more the blond decided to take his time for now. Reaching up, the host lightly grasped Nakura's wrist so as to angle his hand a little higher. Then, as a drop of wine slipped down to the space between Nakura's ring and middle finger the blond's tongue promptly followed. Hungrily, Delic slid the pink muscle along the skin there, feeling along the junction of the two fingers before pressing in deeper to brush his lips there. Mouth practically watering the blond began to suck the skin between the two fingers, enjoying the way Nakura squirmed out of reaction to the sudden affection. Other hand wrapping tighter around the informant, he moved the male's hips so that he was seated just right upon the host's crotch before he was moving his mouth to let Nakura re-dip his fingers into the glass. As he did so Delic finally risked a glance up towards Nakura only to find himself having to suppress a groan.

There was a flush on the raven's face, the red tint caused by a mixture of the alcohol coupled with the humiliation and arousal the raven was surely feeling. Red eyes were barely open now, dark lashes skimming along his cheeks as he watched the way his fingers sank into the dark liquid only to close again once he had lifted the digits back out so as to hold them out to Delic. The silent acceptance to the host's whim was delectable, and it spurned a further need to push his boundaries deep within the blond host. Without warning, Delic opened his mouth then before slowly swallowing the two fingers inside, suckling at them hard while he still had the chance. Eyes practically burning into the other male, Delic stared up at the informant unnervingly for any response Nakura could give, but much to his chagrin, the informant had gritted his teeth and refused to moan as Delic had hoped. However-! Loathe as the informant was to admit, Nakura had shivered; Shivered hard enough that Delic could even be satisfied with just that much.

Delic hummed pleasantly as he continued to suck and lick, his tongue twirling around the two digits and licking between them while Nakura continued to grit his teeth and refused to let a single sigh escape despite how he squirmed pleasantly against his host. Finally, after what probably seemed to be a very long time to Nakura, Delic dragged his mouth away lewdly so that the fingers were wet and covered in his saliva.

"More please," Delic smirked as his sly tongue licked at his moistened lips.

He watched as the informant visibly shuddered then while Nakura tried to suppress the deeply hungry look beginning to infiltrate his own eyes. The informant drew in a deep breath, a calming inhale least he get caught up in Delic's pace, and finally dipped his fingers again to return to feeding the host.

This time Delic sucked from the start. His amused eyes flickered upward to stare into that deep flush as the informant's eyes shifted away, unable to meet his gaze. Such a demure reaction was quickly exchanged with a feisty glare when Delic teasingly nibbled on the fingertips lightly.

The host couldn't help but chuckle when Nakura finally snapped the fingers away.

"Do I need to muzzle you?" Nakura huffed. And the host couldn't help but hold him closer.

"It didn't hurt, did it? I never said I won't use my teeth after all." Delic purred as he poured another glass with wine and held it up for the informant to have a sip.

"Here, you should have some too. You do like the wine, don't you?"

Nakura obviously didn't want to drink more but he took it and sipped slowly, mostly to pass the time it seemed since, if he was the one drinking, he didn't have to 'feed' the wine to the host.

"Don't look so upset, sweetheart, it was suppose to be fun." Delic gave him his most hurt-puppy look that always swooned the women over. But of course it only gave him the opposite result when it came to this informant. Nakura glared at the word 'sweetheart.' Such a naked and pure disdain look was almost enchanting on his face. It was definitely fun to tease this man, though Delic told himself he shouldn't push too much lest the informant ditched him for good.

"Fun for you maybe," Nakura shrugged and sipped his wine slowly. Very, very slowly.

"You know, turtles drink faster than you." Delic whined as he rubbed his face against the informant's shoulder. "I'm gonna be lonely if you don't feed me soon~"

Nakura sighed as he finished his wine. Delic could smell the alcohol flavored breath in the air and he wanted to kiss him so badly but he held himself back.

"Now then… shall we continue?" Delic licked his lips and gazed at his informant seductively.

The informant gritted his teeth once more and re-dipped his fingers to feed him while the host wrapped his arms around that petit waist again, wishing in his heart that the hour could last forever.

If only the world could be so kind to a man as corrupt as him.

* * *

After that it took a full month before the informant came back to see Delic again. The last session must have traumatized the informant more than the host had thought. In his opinion it had just been some innocent finger licking but to Nakura it might have been something more…

Delic shrugged it off though and smiled again as he reconfirmed his schedule for the day. Nakura was definitely listed on there as his last client at least. He couldn't help but look forward to their meeting tonight no matter what worries their last might have ingrained in him.

Again Delic had ordered the red rose to be delivered, something that was much easier to request since he found the shop that sold them. And he waited like an anxious child on Christmas eve as the clock ticked closer and closer to the appointed time of his gift's arrival.

The informant arrived in a similar attire as the last time but he still somehow looked just as exquisite as ever, those russet eyes prepared for the inevitable battle he would duel with the host who, in turn, warmly welcomed him with an ever graceful smile as he took his coat and handed him the rose. Then, just like last time, the informant accepted it as yet another challenge to guard his heart against the number one thief of hearts in Tokyo.

Delic watched, crestfallen, as the informant went straight to his window yet again and promptly perched on the couch to look out below.

Surely this wasn't just a ploy to prolong their engagement. This informant must have a thing for window watching.

Delic sighed as he sat down next to Nakura and was about to pull him back to his lap but stopped.

Nakura-san… was smiling.

He blinked in surprise at having caught the man unguarded so soon… and at such an unusual time. The host stared outside to see if there was something in particular that was going on that had made the informant smile, but - alas to his eyes - everything was the same. The same type of people engaging in the same repetition of debauchery and depravity.

Again Delic stared at the young informant with his arms crossed and his face nestled in them, sighing pleasantly as he watched the humans down below commit all sorts of sins in the name of desire. Such a naked pleasure on the informant's face…

"Beautiful…"

Nakura blinked, caught unaware as the voice of the host broke his trance, his eyes shifted back towards Delic who had been staring at him.

"You do have a beautiful smile," Delic caressed the informant's cheek with the back of his hand gently, the backs of his index finger barely touching that alabaster skin.

"I'm just sad that the smile wasn't for me. Who does it belong to down there?"

Nakura stared back out the window wordlessly. At first Delic had thought that Nakura wouldn't answer him until the informant finally spoke quietly, "It's for no one. And everyone at the same time." Then he flashed a grin to the host. "I love all humans, after all. But no one in particular."

"... I don't believe you, informant-san." Delic shook his head.

"Ah… you know so little of me, host-san." Nakura dropped the topic as he slid back down the couch and away from the view of the window.

"Then back to the business at hand?" Nakura switched his mode to his usual business self. The host's fingers twitched, wanting to see what would happen if he were to forcefully tear off that mask and make this man moan under him. He would love to see that.

But alas, Delic held his desires in check and wrapped his arms around the informant's waist, pulling him to sit on his lap once more with their bodies facing each other.

"We'll play a game," The blond suggested. "An honesty game." Delic smiled brightly in order to relax the informant as he noticed him stiffen with tension at the word 'honest.' "It's the most popular game with the ladies you know."

"I'm not one of your clients, Delic-san" Again Nakura sighed in that deflated tone that only made Delic want to try harder.

"Just hear me out. We will ask each other a question and the other person must answer honestly. But, if it's something you can't or don't want to answer… we feed each other something on that table."

Nakura looked behind him to see the plate of chocolates and wine and Delic could see the man mulling over it in his head.

"Ah, but there's a twist." Delic smirked when he noticed those gorgeous eyes flicker.

"You can't feed me with your hands." Delic added before leaning back so as to allow the new information to sink in.

"You mean…" Nakura looked shocked. "I have to feed you with my feet?"

It took a split second before Delic burst out laughing. He held the informant's waist even closer as Nakura smiled teasingly down at him too.

This man was a treasure.

"No, I'd prefer you don't use your feet either." Delic added.

"You know… I don't have armpit kinks…" Nakura sighed in feigned defeat. "But if you insist..."

"No armpits either." Delic laughed and shook his head.

"Well then I suppose I could use…"

"No, not that, whatever it is." Delic chuckled. Then he placed a finger on Nakura's lips.

"I'll be more specific then. You must use your lips."

"I thought we agreed on no kissing." Nakura's pouts should be a sin, Delic decided.

"No, no kissing. No mouth to mouth, I promise."

"Then how am I to feed you the wine?" Nakura asked pointedly. Delic smirked, he was sharp to note that the wine and the glass were on the table as well.

"Ah...if you're so insistent on getting me inebriated I suppose you could use your hand for the wine. Although, you must know, the ladies  _love_  being fed wine mouth to mouth… "

"Pass~" The informant shrugged nonchalantly.

"You wound me," Delic let out a deep sigh. "Well? Do we have a deal?"

Nakura pretended to think for a moment before he finally agreed. It wasn't as if he could refuse and Delic knew it.

"Alright, are you a man or a woman?" Delic smiled as he started with an easy question.

"A man." Nakura shook his head at such a silly waste of time. Then his eyes flickered slyly.

"What was your name before you took the name 'Delic'?"

Delic couldn't help but grin as he grabbed a cookie and put it in his mouth for Nakura to take. Nakura blinked and then frowned. So, the informant couldn't ask questions the host didn't want to answer either, teasingly or not.

Nakura leaned in and lightly bit the other end of the cookie and took the whole thing, eating only the parts where Delic's lips or teeth didn't touch and throwing the rest into the nearby trash can.

"That hurts, informant-san." Delic pouted as he held a hand against his 'wounded heart'. "I was looking forward to you eating the whole thing…. especially the part I secretly licked."

"Maybe next time.. Besides, wasn't I supposed to be feeding you?." Nakura waved away Delic's antics easily. "I had thought you needed an example." Delic grinned again as he was caught. "More like you were too eager to make me eat where you had licked." Nakura sighed, one hand absently reaching up to make sure there were no more crumbs on his lips. "I understand the rules. It's your turn now."

"Mmm… how about…" Still smiling smugly despite Nakura's awareness of his ploys Delic leaned back thoughtfully. Part of him wondered if it was too early to ask what he really wanted to know, but he was too curious not to ask as soon as possible, "What is your real name?"

Nakura glared and grabbed the glass of wine to hold it up to the host.

Ah, that confirmed that "Nakura" wasn't his real name at least. Delic smiled as he held the wine glass and watched as the informant take a sip.

"My turn. When did you lose your virginity?"

"Aww informant-san, such a direct question into one's privacy needs a bit more decorum when spoken~ I was 15." The blond smirked as he answered without a hesitation, but seeing Nakura's reaction, either he already knew that information or he knew that Delic would answer. It seemed that Nakura would prefer Delic actually answer the question rather than feed him cookies mouth to mouth and Nakura knew if the questions were too boring, Delic would just ask to feed him.

This man really was fast at adjusting to new situations.

"My turn," Delic smiled as his fingers rubbed the dip in of Nakura's back. There was a slight jolt in reaction and he knew what to ask next. "Are you ticklish? And where?"

That earned yet another glare as Nakura grabbed the wine glass again for the host to feed him. Delic pouted. "Aren't you ever going to want eat a cookie?"

The informant didn't answer and sipped the wine instead. Oh well, this wasn't so bad… after all, the informant was light weight and there was a hint of flush on his cheeks already.

However, Nakura's eyes were just as fiery and defiant as ever. Delic knew almost instinctually to prepare himself for another biting question when the informant asked, "My turn. When did you run away from home?"

"..." Delic blinked. He wasn't… prepared for that one. Not many knew of his past and that question clearly hinted that… the informant indeed knew of his past. Ah, so was this the informant's way of telling him not to mess with him? That if he messed with Nakura too much, Delic would get just as hurt?

Slowly the blond smiled, his expression hesitating at first. "Is that what people say I did?" A moment later and the host was relaxing despite the invasive question as his eyes finally softened into an expression of complacence. "I suppose it was when I was 17." Delic finally answered honestly despite his slight one-shouldered shrug. "That was around the time I stopped going home at least."

Unwavering, Delic stared up into the angry informant's eyes, watching the way those blood hued orbs hardened as he replied to the private question easily enough. He had called Nakura's hand, recognizing that the raven's only defense so far was the past the blond had been trying so hard to hide. But when it came to his own entertainments and curiosities Delic didn't give up quite as easily. Even if the game had started out light hearted it was now turning into something far more serious. After all, two could play at this game.

"My turn again." Head tilting towards Nakura the blond carefully maintained his soft smile. "Tell me then, who are you in love with, informant-san?" Delic asked the question seriously, his cherry blossom colored eyes darkening as his smile slowly faded. "Who is it that hurt you so much that you remain guarded against even a host?"

The blond watched as Nakura's eyes widened, unable to hide the shock that struck the very core of the informant's being. Although the reaction wasn't the answer to his question it did at least answer the one that Delic hadn't spoken.

Ah, so it… was true then.

With just that Delic was able to confirm the hunch he had possessed since the beginning of their 'deal'. After all, the way the informant had refused any physical contact, the way he had fought against the need to moan, the way he guarded himself from all of Delic's seduction and skillful hosting methods, and the very fact that he had refused to allow Delic something as simple as a kiss on the lips….

However, before Delic could press for more information Nakura had already grabbed a cookie and with far more force than was necessary shoved it into the host's mouth.

"Mmmfph… daina howa huu fuu gumm." Delic pouted as he chewed and swallowed. "That's not how you play the game, informant-san." The host feigned innocence to the reason for Nakura's anger as he stared down towards him. "I'm supposed to feed you."

"I'm not playing anymore." Nakura replied as he got up from Delic's lap. But before he could put too much distance between them the host was quickly standing as well to suddenly grab Nakura, both arms wrapping around the raven to hug him close from behind.

"Don't go." The blond's head fell to hide his face in Nakura's dark hair, his voice slightly muffled as he continued to speak. "I'm sorry, I didn't… mean to hurt you."

"I'm  _NOT HURT_!" The informant shouted.

"Right, of course. My apologies." At the other's shout Delic let Nakura go so as to pull a folded piece of paper from his pockets.

"Here's your information."

Nakura regarded him with mistrust at first before carefully taking the information he had came for.

"Why?" Nakura asked, despite his anger. It hadn't been even thirty minutes and clearly Nakura had decided to end their deal before he had been able to earn the information.

"Because I breached our contract first by making you uncomfortable. It's the least I can do to make it up to you." Hand falling down Delic maintained an apologetic air as he continued to speak. "I do hope I'll still be able to see you again." Eyes closing briefly the blond bowed with earnesty before the informant, a humility expressed in the gesture that only troubled the informant further.

With the information he came for in hand, Nakura carefully shoved the piece of paper deep into his pant's pocket and stepped back. However, when he reached for the coat hanging nearby Delic grabbed it before him. "Please allow me."

Nakura sighed but didn't fight it as Delic helped him into the coat.

"But this isn't fair for you is it? This trade."

"Well, I didn't learn anything from our game, clearly my loss. But I do hope you'll come again." Delic smiled, letting the informant go.

Nakura stared down at the floor, mulling over the problem before he faced the host with those clear scarlet eyes. Clearly Nakura didn't really want to lose the host as he was a valuable asset.

"Alright, I'll tell you something about myself in exchange for the information."

Delic blinked in surprise at the sudden change but he listened as the informant started telling him a story.

"There was a guy in my classroom. He was quiet young man and an outcast. No one wanted to be his friend because he was awkward and gloomy.

One day one of the girls saw him reading a book she also liked. She squealed at him and fangirled. She was able to befriend the boy and they talked long hours together about their favorite books.

One day the girl found another guy reading the same book. She went over to him and also fangirled. The boy wasn't happy to share that side of her with someone else but he did not say anything.

The girl at first tried to get all of them to hang out. But slowly the new boy showed her other books he liked. Soon the two only talked to each other, leaving the outcast boy out of their conversations by accident.

The girl fell in love with the new boy who was clearly more sociable and friendly than the other boy, as well as being more than witty and intelligent than any other she had ever met. She told the outcasted boy with a blushing, happy smile that she was going to confess to the new boy.

The outcast was very hurt by this news. He felt betrayed. The new boy had so many other friends, after all, so why did 'he' have to take the only friend he had ever made in his entire life? After all, the outcast boy never knew when he would ever be able to have another friend like her.

But, despite his pain, the outcasted boy cheered the girl on instead and pretended to support them.

Now, tell me. What should the outcast have done? Stop them? Say it's unfair? That this new boy was hogging his only friend when he could always make new ones? Should he have tried to intervene or sabotage the new boy? And was it wrong of the new boy to befriend the girl and accidentally take away the outcast's only friend?"

Delic stared in confusion at the raven, unsure what the story had to do with anything. The one thing he could surmise was that the new popular boy, when applied to whatever situation this was, would inevitably fall upon his role. The story sounded like a story of himself as the host stealing all the girls from the other men who weren't as fortunate as he in his talent and skills to charm a lady. But did that make the girl Nakura in this case? And who would be the old boy? His client's real lovers and husbands? But how did they relate with Nakura?

And since when did Delic read books for  _leisure_?

Either way the answer to Nakura's questions were pointless as it seemed to only raise more questions. Almost as though Nakura was trying to initiate some kind of debate in which the scarlet eyed male would play the devil's advocate to whatever answer Delic could supply.

"Why should the new boy be punished for the old boys mistakes? If he had loved her the old boy should have tried to stop the affection from growing between the two others at the get go instead of allowing himself to fall into the background. " Delic finally replied, his brows pinched together as though he were taking the situation seriously for Nakura's sake.

"And who is to say that just because the new boy has lots of friends that he is deserving of losing this girl? What gives the outcasted boy the right to say how many of those other friends could capture his attention like that girl could? If anything you could argue that most, if not all, of those friends aren't people that the new boy consider to be good friends. Surface level friendships offer no gratification, after all. The girl could very well be the new boy's only chance at genuine happiness as well."

Crossing his arms over his chest, Delic sighed. Finally breaking eye contact with the informant he glanced back towards where his window was as if to reaffirm his own thought of how people like that could never be his 'good friends'. Party friends, maybe. But there was a difference between people you party with and people you want to go home to everyday with.

"Your questions imply that it is the old friend who is the victim in this scenario simply because he rolled over and allowed the girl to fall in love with someone else. But if he had interfered with her confessing and sabotaged the relationship, then who would be the real victim in that scenario when her happiness is on the line?"

Delic replied the best he could, struggling to see what it was that Nakura was trying to convey. After a few seconds he finally glanced back to watch as the informant slowly grinned at him like a Cheshire cat who had caught a confused Alice in its mind maze.

"Oh Delic-san, you really do amuse me. This is why I love humans." Nakura smiled almost fondly at him and chuckled.

Delic blinked again. Who was this? Who was this… man before him, smiling with a wickedly dazzling grin as if he was a predator who had caught his prey?

"By sympathizing with the new boy," Nakura started to explain, "you have already decided that this isn't a simple story, but an allegory. An allegory of yourself. By defending the new boy, you are defending your own past experiences where you had been accused in a similar manner of getting in the way of other's love, experiences which left you feeling slighted since you believe you are the victim, rather than the antagonist."

Delic's frown deepened, his fists tightening slightly against his chest as Nakura spoke confidently about matters he surely didn't understand.

Nakura continued even as he noticed Delic's fists balling up, "And by adding yourself into my story you decided that I must have added myself into it as well. This way you were hoping that I had answered your affections indirectly. That I'm somehow a victim to your charms and trapped between choosing you or choosing another. Well, either that or perhaps you had simply thought that I was a victim in the past to someone like you and therefore was refusing this relationship as a consequence. Either way, you self-inserted yourself into the story and then inserted me, forcing me into the role of the girl who is trying to choose between you and her past."

Then the informant shrugged with that nonchalant apathy that could kill a person.

"When in truth, I had simply told you my answer since the very beginning."

Delic's eyebrows furrowed and slowly his calm exterior faded away into an expression of frustrated anger.

"And what was your answer from the beginning?" The host was forced to ask.

Nakura chuckled as he turned the knob to the door to leave.

"Remember I said 'there was a guy in  _my_  classroom."

His scarlet eyes seemed to gleam with uncanny glow.

"I'm just an observer. Simply watching. Which is why I don't care to pursue a romantic interest. I love watching humans more and that is who I am." With that the informant gave him a small mysterious smile before closing the door behind him.

Delic stood there petrified and unable to breathe before his heart pounded into his chest so hard that he gasped and coughed moments before collapsing onto the couch.

Then, slowly, as his senses came back to him the host began to laugh. He laughed and laughed uncontrollably, unable to stop the maddening pounding of his heart at the fact that he had been beaten in the game he had thought he was winning. No one had ever outmatched him before. No one had ever used his own words against him like that nor had they ever managed to keep him struggling a losing battle in wits.

And, most importantly, no one had ever captured Delic's curiosity before without even trying like that.

"Now I only want you more… informant-san…." Delic whispered as he finally began to calm down, his eyes staring up at the ceiling of his rose garden. Then, after a moment of quiet, he covered his eyes with his hand and let out a deep satisfied sigh laced with an excitement he hadn't felt in his hollow heart in a long time.

"And I always get what I want."

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rukawagf: Thank you so much for reading. There's been a question (from Michelle15556 ) as to how the two author's are writing. We both work on the outlines. I mostly draft up the bone, Culpaeros/Amee fills in some, I fill in some etc. Then when we write it's similar. I write up the bone work, I ask her what Delic/Shizuo would say, and I write what Izaya would say, she fills in some, I fill in some, we both talk about certain paragraphs or scenes and work on it etc. Thank you for asking :3
> 
> Amee: Hello again everyone! In regards to the question Ruka mentioned, in the end the brunt of my work is ensuring that you all love Delic as much as you already love Shizuo to make the story all the more entertaining for you, I hope I make ya'll writhe with indecision when the time of choosing comes! As always thank you for reading and I hope you stick with us until the very end.


	3. Chapter 3

" _Music was my refuge. I could crawl into the space between the notes and curl my back to loneliness."_  ― by Maya Angelou

* * *

Lady Tomoe Gozen's parties were always elaborate, with elegant venues and exotic refreshments all used to simply display her wealth and power amongst the elite. Tonight's was not going to be any different. Ever the forward thinker and an elite of her own creation, this time Lady Gozen decided to display her wealth and power over men and mankind alike as she hired not just one, but  _two_  host clubs members to be her personal attendants and escorts for the evening. They were to be the staff for her large, elaborate mansion party, open only to those who had been invited.

Of course, not  _all_  of the hosts were for her. Only the most popular hosts from each club were to be her escorts for the evening. The other hosts were to be on the floor and were for the guests, acting mostly as butlers and entertainment as they pampered, flattered, and adored.

Delic sat on Lady Gozen's right while Delic's main rival from the other host club, Ryoma, sat on her left. Her 'throne' was slightly elevated from the rest of the floor, a large, posh white couch situated center stage, as she smiled and greeted each of her incoming guests. Most of them were ladies, a few even arriving with their own escorts, while even fewer came with lovers or husbands. However, irregardless of whether the guest was male or female, all the hosts accommodated each and every one of them to a lively party filled with songs, dances, and friendly banter.

Despite the lively atmosphere that would normally require all of Delic's attention, he couldn't help but let his eyes wander past it all in his search for  _him_  again.

 _Him_  being Nakura-san.

* * *

" _I have a favor to ask this time instead of information," he had said._

" _I'd like to attend the party."_

* * *

And so Nakura-san had come to be in attendance as well in his own custom butler suit. Delic was not sure which tailor had created the outfit - none of the usual host club designer's seemed to match the style, but it was a look that suited the informant. On the wrists were small cufflinks, the appearance of which seemed more cute to Delic than mature, while a chain and other adornments were worn along the vest. Despite the unusual design, however, Nakura-san seemed to fit right in along with the other hosts. While the hosts from one club thought that he belonged to the other club, the other club presumed he was from the first club; none of the hosts actually bothered to question his background. After all, the hosts had to get along, exercise stable teamwork, and trust in one another to please a crowd as large as this one.

And so it was that Delic couldn't help but let his eyes wander towards him as Nakura smiled and chattered away with a nearby guest. He was quite the exquisite sight to behold, even more so than usual, tonight. Fuchsia eyes burned with an undeniable thrill at the way that black suit hugged his back where the blond host knew he was ticklish, almost as though the suit itself were teasing him now. It also didn't help any that the silk black shirt was completely buttoned, hiding away tempting collarbones in a way that made Delic want to leisurely undo them for the sake of slowly revealing the prize underneath. But, perhaps the worst part of it all, was the way those sultry red eyes sharpened as he smiled… It made a pulse of excitement vibrate through him, compelling Delic to-

"Ah, what's this? The number one host caught in the act of neglecting his client?" Lady Gozen's sharp eyes peered over at him as she smirked. Immediately, his eyes switched their focus towards the young wealthy widow. "Never, baby," Delic replied lowly as he leaned forward to kiss her forehead, his arms laid behind him on the couch in a relaxing manner. "I was just making sure our hosts were working properly so that I wouldn't have to run up there and help if an emergency were to occur. I'd prefer your party to be the talk of the town for all the right reasons, after all."

"Ahh… the ever perfect host-senpai." She giggled as Ryoma handed her a glass of wine. "I was rather worried another beautiful and rich widow might have caught your eyes.."

Of course she wasn't serious and Delic knew this. The ever-generous matron was a client whose loss would be heavily felt within the club. As good as Delic was as a host, even he stood a chance at getting blacklisted were he to offend her. And her influence over the other women in the elite social sphere would only cause further damage to the club later on. As shrewd as he was, there would be no recovering from her cutting ties with the club and she knew this as well. Taking her hand, the blond bowed his head in a sign of humility before gently kissing it. Then, as a smile spread upon his face, Delic seemed incapable of kissing upwards towards her wrist until his lips had led him all the way towards the crook of her arm. By now the woman was laughing, her face freshly brightened as Delic looked up once more. He took her free hand and kissed it. "As if any other woman could ever take my eyes off of you. I'm already full of remorse for having to look away from your beauty - even if only for a second - to check on my fellow hosts."

Although the lady was not so young that she could take such flatteries from the host seriously, she still could not resist a girlish giggle at them. Delic and Ryoma both knew that she treated them more like decorations or as though they were her own personal pets, but she was still their client, and no matter how condescendingly she treated them, they still did their best to make sure she was treated like a queen.

With the crisis averted, Delic was able to lean back so as to let Ryoma take over the conversation. Although he kept one ear peeled to their talk so that he may interject at appropriate times, the blond could not resist allowing his mind to wander. Delic still did not know why Nakura had asked to be invited. He figured it must be due to some information gathering but since, so far, all the informant had been doing was enjoying himself, Delic could not be sure.

He almost wished he could just jump to the floor and host with the others in the crowd in an attempt to get close to the raven again. It certainly looked more fun than being cooped up next to the throne like someone's lap dog. Elitism had its merit, but at the moment Delic would rather be with the other normal hosts, next to Nakura in the swelling crowd and having his fun playing his games with the other man.

But instead, here he was, stuck with the queen-bee and perched on a pedestal as she watched all of her attendees mingle below with the two most popular hosts remaining as her own decorative pieces. Delic knew it was a waste, but it was what Lady Gozen had wanted - to be admired, adored and worshipped.

Delic had lost count of how many of Lady Gozen's guest had come to speak their pleasantries with her. The guests stepping onto the platform only briefly for more mindless chat. They were like birds, prattling on about nonsense from politics to fashion in front of the sharp eyes of Lady Gozen who remained lounging in her long black dress with lavish soft fur. Sometimes her words were just as airheaded as her guests' and sometimes her replies were venomous from the offhanded passive aggression that laced them. She enjoyed ruffling her guest's feathers, knowing that they did not have the courage nor the power to even call her out on it. It was a one-sided smackdown and Delic could feel even his optimistic countenance straining as one of the girl's lips trembled at one particular harsh comment from Lady Gozen concerning her fashion choices.

Delic's eyes trailed after the poor girl, finding it unfortunate that he couldn't go out there to comfort her. Then his heart jumped as Lady Gozen spoke,

"Who's that? I don't recognize that host."

Delic's eyes followed the Lady's gaze to find who he feared.

None other than Nakura who was busy charming a lady with his words and smile.

"I like his looks," she said as she called a host nearby. "Go get him for me?"

Without any further prompting, the host rushed over towards him, and within seconds Nakura bowing before the widow.

"You've called for me? Lady Gozen."

"Ah yes, you must be new." She smiled, her voice sweet as poison. "What's your name?"

"Nakura, Lady Gozen," he smirked.

"Is that what you call yourself today?" she asked sharply.

"It's what I wish to call myself today, my lady." He smiled back as innocently as ever. Delic could feel himself turning cold, his palm sweating from the sudden onslaught of nerves. He did not want to get into trouble if it was found out that Nakura was not a regular host, after all. Even worse, if Nakura accidentally angered a powerful regular like Lady Gozen, then everything he had worked for up until this point would fall into ruin.

"Come entertain me then, Nakura. I'm bored," she commanded loftly.

"Ah, it looks like the couch is taken, though." Nakura held his hands up in defeat. "Unless…" his eyes sharpened. "One of them gives up their spot."

Lady Gozen's eyes almost glowed at the challenge sent to her hosts, quite admiring the 'ambition' Nakura must have. Although Delic could sense the challenge just as well as the others could, the blond was far too distracted trying to find some way out of this mess while keeping his own composure. He was never one to leave his fate in another's hands and trusting Nakura to not screw this up left him far too anxious. However, as he was blissfully unaware of the situation, Ryoma just chuckled as he spoke, "Well, it'll be up to Lady Gozen if one of us should give up the throne." The invitation was clear and Delic saw it as an opportunity. Ryoma, while certainly charming in his own way, was nothing compared to the greatest host in all of Tokyo. Lady Gozen's interest in the newcomer would be nothing compared to her need to maintain appearances. Consequently, Delic presumed, without him beside her, Lady Gozen would not appear nearly as influential as she would hope to. If he offered to go, then surely there was a chance at making her change her mind on this.

Within a mere half a second, Delic began to stand. "I don't mind attending to the floor while you play, my lady."

His smile was peaceful, but the way his heart hammered revealed only to him the gamble he was taking.

"No, no. You sit." The young possessive widow grabbed Delic and forced him back down. The host found himself almost hard-pressed to resist sighing out of relief.

"Ryoma-kun can have his break, though."

Only to switch to a need to sigh out of exasperation not a second later. Lady Gozen smirked — however, her wishes and dismissal were clear. As a result, Ryoma could only gracefully bow towards her, thanking the lady for her time and promising to return, before giving up his seat.

With that, in one night, Nakura was able to walk up to the pedestal overlooking the crowd.

And, once again, Delic noted that Nakura enjoyed looking down at others more than at his client, a very bad manner for any host as he could recently attest to.

But Nakura smirked and faced Lady Gozen once more.

"So, how may I be of service?"

Delic groaned inwardly. Already Nakura was making all the amateurish mistakes of a new host. After all, a host should never ask how to entertain the client. He should know how to start entertaining  _immediately._

"Lady Gozen, you're just teasing him with your attentions. He is still fairly new at this, after all. You are going to make him nervous." Delic interrupted, trying to smooth it over by playing up Nakura's rookie status.

"No, it's alright. It's almost a refreshing change. Actually, what surprises me the most is that I'm surprised you switched your business from being an informant to a host….  _Nakura-san_." Lady Gozen smirked as she sipped at her wine.

Delic blinked. They knew each other.

"I am humbled and honored that Lady Gozen recognized me." Nakura bowed again.

"So then, what brings you here to my party? If you had wanted to attend, you could have simply asked."

"Ah, perhaps another time. Last time I had to attend one of your parties, you had me leave the premises in the company of some… questionable reputation. I'd rather not repeat that incident."

Delic raised an eyebrow at that. It felt like he was missing out on at least half of the conversation and he couldn't help but be curious as to what it was all really about.

Lady Gozen chuckled as she lowered her glass and leaned onto Delic as if he was her personal pillow. In return, Delic automatically shifted his arm, creating space for her and a place for him to wrap it slightly around her body so that his fingers could gently rub the bare skin of her arm in an idle manner.

"Well, then? Are you having fun gathering information at my party? Found any new victims? Or perhaps some more interesting secrets?"

"None as interesting as the secret of your late husband's poisoning."

Delic felt his heart drop at Nakura's casual mention of the forbidden topic. It had been rumored that her husband had died of unnatural causes but he, as her host, had never questioned it. All he ever knew was that his death had allowed his young and beautiful wife to inherit the company that went on to make her into who she was today and, really, that was all he ever really needed to know.

Mouth going dry, Delic quickly tried to swallow back the nerves resurfacing. The host could feel the malice and aggression filling the very air around them as his client glared daggers at Nakura.

"Oh? Is that what they say?"

Nakura smiled innocently back. "Words are like the wind, my lady. They blow to and fro but they are harmless without any evidence. The clean-up was professionally done and history is always written by the winners of war. After all, whoever wins the war must always be the hero as that's what the world wants to see, no? Aren't you enjoying your victory, Lady Gozen? I'm sure many here don't even remember the little ambitious girl who had came to Tokyo from Sendai with only her wits and couple hundred yen."

Nakura smirked as he stood up, looking down at Lady Gozen as she quivered with fury.

"Don't worry, Lady Gozen. You are a god amongst mortals, surely fate is on your side while you live." Nakura waved off as he stepped back onto the floor, his voice fading into the loud music and the crowd.

"After all, hell is but a warm place to stay for eternity, if you believe in that sort of thing."

Delic practically wanted to smash his own face into the nearby wall after that. His only saving grace was the mere fact that his face was part of his charm. But, the fact of the matter was that Lady Gozen was lividly angry and it was up to  _him_  to unruffle her feathers now before Ryoma could return. He would have to talk to Nakura later about this, but for now his client, as always, was his priority.

* * *

It took far longer than Delic would have liked for Lady Gozen to calm down after that. By the time Ryoma had joined them, she was skittish and in a far better mood with enough wine to soften some of her sharper comments.

At the return of Ryoma, the woman practically threw herself at him, her elbow accidentally hitting the glass of watered down wine Delic had been working through. Although the brush had been gentle, given the woman's inebriated state, the blond figured he could get away with mimicking a spill from her behavior.

Lady Gozen's voice turned almost shrill thanks to her embarrassment and displeasure at witnessing the red saturate the pure white of Delic's suit.

Letting go of Ryoma, she returned to Delic's arms, trying to sop it up off of his jacket and pants with her napkin to no avail. Laughing it off, Delic distracted her with a kiss to her cheek, his lips sliding down towards her ear to whisper a question — if she would like to come to the back to help him change? Almost instantly the panic vanished from her expression and she giggled like she had earlier, the woman lightly tapping him and promising to help him later tonight. In exchange, though, he was allowed to stand and leave, the host heading off the stage to move down towards where the back rooms were and where he kept his spare suit.

However, as he made his way through the crowd (his jacket already taken off and folded over his arm so as to better hide the stains) he couldn't help but risk a quick glance around. Almost immediately he was able to locate Nakura, the man standing off a little from where the majority of the attendees had gathered to talk to another gentleman.

The man wasn't a host, judging from his attire, but Delic could not say with whom he may had come. Pausing for a moment Delic tried to gauge the situation, noticing that for once Nakura didn't seem to be smiling. But perhaps, Delic told himself, that person was the real reason for Nakura's attendance. Head tilting to the side, the blond stared before realizing he had lingered too long. He knew the lady would be expecting his return, and if he wasted time now he would not be able to stop by to speak with Nakura before his return. Reluctantly, Delic turned away to continue towards the backroom's door.

But the feeling that something wasn't right still remained within him.

Almost as soon as he'd reached the door, Delic paused once again to glance back. But this time neither Nakura nor the man remained where they had been before. Not yet feeling panicked despite the worsening of the feeling in his gut, Delic glanced around some more - his hand on the door's handle - while he tried to locate them once again.

"Something wrong?"

The bouncer that was stationed outside of the doorway suddenly broke into Delic's thoughts. Jumping slightly in surprise Delic looked towards him before immediately laughing. "No, I am only looking for someone who might be the same height as me to lend me pants," he lied. Without really thinking about it, the host moved back into the room - still wearing his wine stained clothes - to locate the missing informant. Starting first at where he last saw them, the blond walked swiftly before quickly observing his surroundings.

Chandeliers.

Tables and booths.

A few nearby couples.

A curtain.

The bar.

Wait-

Suddenly Delic whirled towards the nearby curtain. Chiding himself for having forgotten the reason for its existence, the blond brushed the fabric aside so that he could step out onto a wide balcony.

There he finally found them, his eyes widening as he witnessed the man from earlier had his hands on Nakura's waist only to move quickly lower and grope at the young informant's rear. His back was turned towards the host as the much older man persisted through Nakura's struggles to prevent the drunken kiss the inebriated man was attempting to steal by covering his mouth with his own hand. What really made the host see red, though, was the face Nakura made, cringing in disgust only to helplessly allow the man's hand to freely roam over his body, the molester attempting yet more kisses on the informant's neck. Feeling a flash of anger, Delic moved quickly forward to grab the guy by the shoulder, yanking him back with an unprecedented strength that sent him nearly flying into the balcony's cement. The entire foundation shook at the man's landing, making it seem like either a miracle or a testament to Delic's control that it did not break under them.

Nakura didn't hide his surprise at the sudden interception. However, he didn't run over to Delic's side. Instead, he stepped forward in front of the host to intervene, "W-wait! It's… a misunderstanding."

Then the informant turned to his molester.

"It's a misunderstanding… isn't it?" Nakura insisted, heavily accenting it out for the other man to play along.

"Y-yes." The man, who seemed to be in his late 40's, got up, staggering. It seemed that the fall had knocked the wind out of him. He didn't even have much energy to grow angry, though his fists balled up as he glared at Delic. His face clearly said, 'How dare a mere host attack him?' But then he too quickly forced a smile. "It's a misunderstanding."

Delic wasn't buying it. His eyebrows furrowed and he hissed, "If you want me to believe that, then you'd better leave, sir. Now, before I call the security."

The man growled as he staggered forward, obviously in pain from the light concussion he'd just received. He glared at the host who stood his ground, Delic's one hand carefully wrapping around his 'kouhai's' waist protectively as a senpai would, as one would perceive as thus.

The older man grit his teeth before pointing his nose upward in a disdainful manner and hurriedly left.

Delic felt the young informant's shoulders sag and his entire body relax against him.

Within seconds, the host whirled onto Nakura, trapping him against the balcony once more, forcing the informant to stare at his angry eyes.

"Who was that? And why would you go so far as to protect someone who was trying to kiss you just now?" Delic's anger was livid. Before Nakura could even protest, the host added further, "I thought those kisses were important to you. Or can I interpret this to mean it would be okay for me to kiss you - right now?"

Nakura shuddered as he stared into those eyes with a stricken expression. When he lowered his gaze and fumbled, "I…." and did not add any further, Delic started to lean closer, his lips mere seconds away from-

"W-wait! I… I'm sorry! Stop!" Nakura covered Delic's mouth with his hands before he could lean further. "I… I was trying to protect you, you idiot! I didn't… want you getting in trouble. I had it under control."

"If that was under control to you, I'd hate to see what he'd have tried when it isn't under your control." Delic voice was muffled against Nakura's hand before he was finally letting out a small sigh. Hand reaching up, the blond took Nakura's hand off of his mouth so that he could hold it loosely as he brought his forehead down to rest against Nakura's.

"Well then, mind explaining what all is going on with you tonight?" Delic asked. "Although I have pretty much figured out why you insisted attending as a host rather than as one of Lady Gozens guests." His brow quirked, eyes focusing in on Nakura's as the anger slowly ebbed away. "Were you here just to torture her or were you here to pick up a molesting boyfriend?"

Nakura remained quiet, his eyes wavering hesitantly, almost in disbelief at Delic's words. The host could see those eyes brighten and turn misty briefly, only further confusing Delic.

Then the informant smiled softly.

Not the kind of smile that Delic had seen Nakura show to Lady Gozen or even that night when he told the story he said wasn't a allegory. It wasn't even the kind of smile Delic saw when the informant was looking outside his window that he had thought was genuine.

It was kind of a smile that melted someone's heart softly like the warm sun on a wintery morning.

Then Nakura wrapped his arms around Delic's neck and hugged him.

"Delic-san… is a really kind person, isn't he?"

Delic remained frozen as Nakura held him close.

_Don't show me that kind of expression, sweetheart…_

…  _else I'll turn into one of the wolves that had just attacked you..._

Feeling guilt settle into his stomach at the thought, Delic kept his face carefully guarded when Nakura pulled away to face Delic again to reply to the host. "You were right. He came to me forcefully and started sexually harassing me… saying something along the lines of how we hosts are pillow boys, anyway. Then he dragged me here, telling me I should just bend over and take it. It seemed that his wife or girlfriend cheated on him and he wanted to take it out on any of the hosts… I just got unlucky. Normally I'd have nicked him with my knife but… I didn't want you in trouble."

Delic searched the informant's eyes, trying to see if any of it was a lie. Search as he might, though, it all seemed true. But still, a part of him believed that 'Nakura' was wearing a mask and part of him wondered if this smile was also a lie.

"There is protocol in these cases, informant-san," Delic sighed. "Just signal a waiter and put your glass upside down upon their tray and they will fetch security."

"Ah… I see. I didn't realize-" Nakura started to say but Delic interrupted with a serious face.

"Hosts can be raped too, Informant-san."

Nakura gazed back into that serious face and solemnly nodded. "I'll be careful."

Delic stared for a moment, wishing that smile would return, as his eyes searched Nakura's face once more. But it was gone like snow on a warm day, already melted away.

Once he had received Nakura's confirmation at his understanding, though, a grin slowly broke out on Delic's face once more. Letting go of the informant's hand, he reached down to idly pat along Nakura's pants as if looking for something. "Besides that, you  _do_  know there is a no weapons policy here, don't you Informant-san? Even hosts are patted down upon entry, how did you sneak one in here?"

Nakura squealed at the seemingly inappropriate pat down and slapped the host's hand away. "I got it, I got it! I'll throw it away or give it to security, so stop patting me!"

Delic couldn't help but laugh at the way Nakura reacted to his touch. He knew Nakura would do neither of those things, but it was still amusing that Nakura at least thought he could lie about it. Letting his hand fall, Delic finally let out a small sigh of relief. Although he had been nervous with the way Nakura had acted around Lady Gozen, that was nothing compared to the anxiety he had felt these last ten minutes. But now, as he watched Nakura flush gently at his touches and squirm to try and get away, the blond felt calmer - more relieved.

For some reason he felt as though these moments would be something he'd want to remember.

Lifting up a hand Delic rubbed his thumb against Nakura's cheek. Fuchsia met scarlet as he gazed briefly into Nakura's eyes before he allowed his head to fall so that he could press his lips close to Nakura's ear.

"I'm glad you are okay."

It was a whispered confession that probably caught Nakura off guard, judging by the way he jolted under Delic. But the blond did not mind, nor did he wish to linger here any longer. He did have work to get back to, after all. Letting out another small chuckle, the blond finally pulled away so as to lead Nakura back in to the party. As he watched the informant mingle his way back in with the crowd easily - the devil flashing yet another charming smile - Delic couldn't help himself as he thought, 'Who is this chameleon?' Which one of these sides that he had been shown was the real 'Nakura-san'? The one that grew flustered whenever Delic teased him with intimacy? Or the one who enjoyed goading others into anger like he did with Lady Gozen? Which of these masks were real and which a fake? Was the one that trembled upon him each time Delic kissed his finger the real Nakura? Or was that just another mask to seduce the host? Was the one that the older man had tried to force himself on the real Nakura? Or was all that just a simple facade, including the one standing before him now with this soft smile so as to trick everyone around him?

No matter, Delic thought. In the end, he planned to peel each mask off of him, one by one, until he found the true Nakura-san underneath.

He always won every game, after all, and he would be sure to win this one.

But as he returned to Lady Gozen's side with a new suit, he couldn't help but think to himself, if that smile was real, then 'Nakura-san' couldn't be as bad a person as he often tried to portray — but rather was someone else entirely.

* * *

" _How many did you sleep with today?"_

" _None, Shizu-chan."_

_There was a sickening crunch as the fist created a crater right next to the teenager's head._

" _You're lying."_

_Izaya stared up at his golden eyes filled with uncontrollable rage._

" _You're lying, you fucking flea and you know it! NOW TELL ME HOW MANY!"_

" _..."_

_And Izaya knew that no matter what he said, Shizuo would never believe him. Even if he were to tell him the truth, Shizuo would still think he was lying._

_And it hurt him deeply, cutting into his heart sharper than a knife, the pain ripping Izaya into shreds, far deeper than Shizuo would ever know._

_So he smirked in that condescending manner, hiding away that deep wound to cut right back at Shizuo's heart._

" _Wouldn't you like to know, Shizu-chan?"_

* * *

Izaya didn't like it.

The whole evening felt like it had become a disaster. Although he had tried to be careful, he had been swept up into Delic's pace again. The host didn't even realize how most of what he'd done which really affected the informant was unconscious on his part. His words, while sweet and clever, were nothing more than idle praise to Izaya. It was the blond's actions that often trapped him.

_You're lying._

How many times had Izaya heard those words?

While it was understandable that clients of his in the past had tried to claim he was a liar, it was only ever a certain blond who had been capable of hurting him with it.

But just like that, Delic had proven, yet again, how stark the differences were between him and his cousin. That was why, when Delic stopped being angry and believed his words without question, Izaya couldn't help but stare at him in disbelief.

Although it was Delic, it was still, to Izaya, Shizuo's face that was accepting him.

He knew it wasn't Shizuo. He knew in his mind that this was Delic, but his heart couldn't quite stop itself from reacting to the sight and sound of Shizuo accepting him. Of Shizuo  _believing_  him. The informant knew this could happen, which was why he had wanted to avoid Delic at all costs, but now it couldn't be helped.

Now it was too late.

"I still love you, stupid Shizu-chan…." Izaya murmured softly, with his arms folded to form a makeshift pillow as he rested against one of the hosting tables. The party was over, and while most of the guests were gone, some of the hosts still lingered… all of them far too drunk to leave just yet. Izaya too knew that he had far too much alcohol in him and if someone were to take advantage of him now, the informant would be hard-pressed to defend himself.

Why did it even matter anymore? Izaya sighed. It wasn't like Shizuo would believe him even if he spelled it out to him. That he was the one who had stolen his first kiss, his virginity… and his heart all in one fell swoop. It felt pointless to even guard himself so much when he knew Shizuo would never come back to him now. Pointless and stupid.

But he still couldn't let go of this love. He remembered far too vividly how badly Shizuo's fingertips had burned into his skin, the way Shizuo's wet lips had assaulted his own until he felt breathless and dizzy, the way those sharp teeth would bite and mark every inch of him that the blond could reach, and the way Shizuo's voice engraved itself within his memory. He couldn't forget Shizuo even now and it had left him ruined.

Everyone else's touch disgusted him.

Everyone else's touch felt  _wrong._

If it was not Shizuo touching him, then nobody else could.

And perhaps it was due to his intoxication that Izaya let his mind wander down memory lane now, the informant falling back into the past he wished he could fix but knew he could not. Mistake after mistake had piled up between him and Shizuo to the point of no return and Izaya was old enough to accept them.

Except the host's face continued to trigger these memories Izaya wished he could forget.

He wanted to go home already, but he knew that Delic would want some sort of payment tonight.

He groaned inwardly. He didn't look forward to that, whatever it was that the host had in mind.

Izaya had messed up a lot today. He had goaded Lady Gozen which was something he shouldn't have done - he knew. But he couldn't help wanting to destroy the pedestal she stood on and watch her fall, as was really his main hobby, or so he told himself.

It was  _NOT_  because she had been all over Shizuo's lookalike.

No, certainly not!

Izaya furrowed deeper into his arms. He fucked up so royally, even Delic had to save his ass… all because he was hesitant to rip a hole into that disgusting man's chest with his knife. And then to be off guard and grow relieved in front of him enough to lower his facade...

It was definitely not the great Orihara Izaya's day. He had never been so off guard in a long time.

… maybe he shouldn't have drunk so much. Even if the clients had insisted...

Resisting the urge to groan aloud, Izaya allowed his head to roll slightly to the side so that he could find a nearby clock. It was approaching 1 am which meant that the establishment would be closing soon, but Delic was still missing. The blond had vanished at some point with Lady Gozen, the two running off to do things that made Izaya's stomach churn.

He hoped it was because he was put off of sex with others and not because he hated the idea of Shizuo's face kissing that woman.

Pushing up, Izaya finally let out a sigh before pulling out one of his many cell phones. He had already gathered most of the information he had needed, but he still had time before he needed to report to Shiki. Besides that, Delic had made Izaya promise to spend the rest of the night with him as payment. As eager as he was to call a taxi, he had to wait.

Luckily for him, it wasn't too much longer before Delic finally reappeared. Lady Gozen was missing from his side for the first time in hours and Izaya instantly felt himself relax. The host was still wearing his suit properly and his hair didn't appear to be out of order. Although he knew it was a far stretch to believe that Delic honestly hadn't done anything with the woman in the backrooms, it at least made him feel a little better.

"Sorry to keep you waiting, Informant-san."

Delic's smile was as bright as always as he made his leisurely way towards Izaya. Although Izaya was sure by now Delic knew Nakura was not his real name, he still did not yet want to tell him what it was, no matter how much the blond insisted on calling him by his title instead. Not that it would matter eventually, surely Lady Gozen at least would be able to provide Delic with his real name soon enough.

"Were you able to enjoy yourself playing host?"

"I can see the merit in it, but it's not my thing." Izaya stood up at the question, his expression carefully guarded until he suddenly swayed at the immediate rush of his blood leaving his brain. However, before he could fall, he felt Delic's arms catch him and quickly pull him close.

"Sorry… guess I had too much to drink."

The informant reached up with one hand, palm moving to press against his temple as he resisted yet another urge to sigh. He was fairly sure Shizuo would have just let him fall. "You're supposed to ask the waiters to water your drinks down." The blond chuckled into Izaya's ear as he helped to straighten Izaya up. This time, though, his arm lingered, remaining wrapped around Izaya's hips just in case. "How do you think I'm able to drink so much every night without falling all over the place come morning?"

"Mmm… magic pills? Maybe some blessings from a fairy godmother?" Izaya joked lightly. He felt comfortable in Delic's arms and remained there for now. "So? Where to?" he sighed, knowing that he wouldn't be looking forward to it.

Delic's grin broadened at the question before he was reaching up with his free hand to undo his tie. "It's a surprise." The blond explained as he handed the fabric over to Izaya. "Put this over your eyes for me."

"... You know…" Izaya frowned as he took the fabric, playing with it instead. "I'm intoxicated enough… I don't think I can walk straight if you cover my eyes…" The blindfold made Izaya very suspicious. He seriously did not like this idea.

"Do you not trust me?" Delic asked, his expression falling slightly as if he wondered if he was worse than the man who had tried to force himself on Izaya earlier. "I'll make sure you don't fall."

"... Don't carry me." Izaya warned before he carefully wrapped the fabric around his eyes, cheating just enough so he could see his feet at least.

"Alright. Ready."

Izaya was led away from the party to a waiting taxi. It made the informant even more nervous that he was being taken away to some place farther, but he tried to remain calm. He heard Delic tell the driver, "Go to this place, please," as he handed the driver a business card, then felt the blond leaning back to sit beside him. "Don't look so nervous, Informant-san. I promise you'll enjoy this."

Izaya sighed that little exasperated sigh he tended to give to Delic. "How do you even know I'd enjoy it?" Really, number one host or not, Delic shouldn't know any private information about him to know his interest or hobbies.

"Call it a gut feeling."

Delic's reply was as ambiguous as the kind Shizuo used to give. He could almost imagine that same grin on Delic's face as though he had won already when the game hadn't even started.

Izaya couldn't help but smirk a bit at Delic's confidence, his smile softening towards the end when he imagined Shizuo grinning back years ago.

"Alright. If you fail, though… you owe me."

Never mind that this was suppose to be 'Delic's' payment. Delic chuckled at that but remained quiet, as though he did not want to say anymore concerning the matter in case Izaya managed to weasel any information out of him.

Luckily, it was a shorter ride than Izaya had expected and soon they were out of the cab. Delic took Izaya's hand and carefully led him up towards the buildings doors. Izaya tried to make out where they were, but it was harder with just trying to see the floors.

When he did finally step onto the tiled floors, the clerk began to lead them further in. He heard some music and he found himself relieved that they were not heading towards a love hotel. … hopefully. As the three of them finally came to a stop, Izaya could hear Delic whispering something to the clerk before finally a door closed behind them. A few moments later and the tie was finally coming undone.

"It's not filled with people, but I figured after this evening we could use a little break from others."

"..." Izaya's expression warmed up upon realization that they had come to a karaoke room. He couldn't help but smile.

"You really wanted to monopolize me, didn't you? Even taking me away from your rose garden window this time." He gave Delic a sly look.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Delic spoke innocently as he grabbed the remote and pulled down Izaya to sit next to him.

"Sit, sit. Let's sing some songs. Are you familiar with the songs? You have been to Karaoke before, I imagine?"

"Would you believe me if I said I used to go to karaoke with bunch of girls almost every day for awhile as a hobby? With empty suitcases?"

Delic looked confused at such a mystic and rather suspicious reply. But Izaya just smiled back.

"No worries. I've been to karaoke before. Though I don't often sing when I do."

"Well we're both going to sing this time," Delic decided as he started to flip through the books.

"Any songs you'd like to recommend?" Izaya picked up the book too and randomly flipped through.

Delic started punching in numbers and queueing up songs as he also ordered few snacks and beverages on the screen.

"I like all of them."

Delic's reply was open, not giving Izaya any clue as to what he might like to hear the informant attempt to sing.

"Hmmm…. I only know kid's anime opening songs, you know. Like Doraemon and Hanamaru Kindergarten." Izaya giggled. "Then that sounds like our first song." Delic laughed back before mashing a couple of buttons so that Hanamaru Kindergarten came up on the screen.

"I'm going first?" Izaya laughed as he picked up his mic and blew it, testing as the adorable sounding instrumental started. He started to singing in that ridiculously cute voice just like how the opening song's original singer sang, except now with his high tenor. Delic's eyes seemed to brighten instantly the moment that Izaya started playing along. Most girls that came to a karaoke room with him were either too shy to sing first or were just expecting a little something more. Happily, the host leaned back, enjoying the view of Izaya's hips swaying slightly to keep up with the beat while he continued. He seemed more than familiar with the song, even slowing down at the right moment and getting quieter at certain lines before singing more loudly and proudly in the cute voice. When the song finally ended, Delic was grinning ear to ear and even applauding lightly if only to cheer Izaya on for more.

"Alright, you're next." Izaya brushed off Delic's praise as he handed Delic the microphone. He wasn't really embarrassed having to sing such a ridiculous song, but he was glad his turn was over. Groaning, Delic took the mic from Izaya and leaned forward to start looking through the songs. Izaya knew that normally Delic would probably pick something romantic. Singing was a talent that most hosts possessed as it went into their entertaining arsenal. Although Izaya had never witnessed any of Delic's performances, he had heard rumor of how it helped the host to become as popular as he was. But even as he thought that was what Delic would pick, the raven found he didn't mind it when Delic finally began to punch in the numbers.

Sitting down, Izaya looked up at Delic whose face was still practically shining in excitement. But before the music could even start, Delic was turning away from the screen and instead facing Izaya. A moment later and one arm was falling to rest on the wall beside Izaya's head.

" _Out of the tree of life, I just picked me a plum_

_You came along and everything started to hum_

_Still it's a real good bet, the best is yet to come"_

The music blared out, jazz filling the room around them. But Delic didn't seem to even flinch as he continued in English, perfectly in time and in tune with the music.

" _The best is yet to come, and baby won't it be fine_

_The best is yet to come, come the day you're mine"_

Izaya couldn't help but grin as Delic put on a bit of a show for him. Leaning back, the blond finally removed his jacket, the sight of which almost proved how he was finally 'off the job' despite how he was obviously still using the charms he had refined as a host against the informant.

" _We've only tasted the wine_

_We're gonna drain that cup dry"_

With his jacket off, Delic was sitting down once more, the mic still held close to his mouth before he grabbed Izaya with his free hand. In one swift movement, he had the informant in his lap. Grin playing on his lips, Delic passed the mic to Izaya, having the informant hold it for him so that the host was free to gently trace his fingers down Izaya's side as the music got softer. Izaya would normally be offended at being forced to sit on the host's lap again, but he couldn't help shuddering instead as Delic's charming voice and hypnotizing eyes started to work its way into the informant's body and mind.

" _Wait till you're locked in my embrace_

_Wait till I hold you near_

_Wait till you see that sunshine place_

_There ain't nothin like it here."_

When the music finally came to a stop Delic's arms were around Izaya's waist. Expression still appearing brightened in some indiscernible happiness, the blond leaned up, pressing the mic against Izaya's lips due to the sudden proximity of their bodies before his head was ducking down to kiss the mic between them as if by doing so he was kissing Izaya himself.

Izaya could feel his cheeks burn at Delic's action. But rather than continue on with that train of thought ,the blond moved back again not a moment later and gave Izaya a cheesy grin.

"No applause?"

Izaya chuckled before suddenly doing something he himself did not understand.

He leaned forward and lightly kissed Delic's temple.

"Not bad," Izaya congratulated and gave him a smile as if he was talking to a cute puppy who just finished a complicated trick. He was just about to add to that when the door opened with the waiter carrying a tray of their food and drinks. Izaya hastily got up from Delic's lap, much to the host's disappointment he was sure.

He grabbed the tray from the waiter who looked a bit embarrassed to see the men in such compromising positions. Izaya then lightly waved him off so that the two could return to their privacy. After that, Izaya sat next to the host instead of back on his lap, promptly stuffing his face so he didn't have to sing as much.

Irregardless of how he behaved, though, Izaya thoroughly enjoyed himself. Delic truly was a perfect host even off the job, singing all the upbeat songs with his sensuous voice, before Izaya followed it up with some of his own favorites, such as ' _Subarashii Hibi_ '. Izaya had originally thought that Delic would ask for more risque requests, but seeing that Delic just wanted to sing and dance, he relaxed completely. This man truly was very talented at making his partner relax.

But after an hour or so, Izaya couldn't help but start to feel tired despite the energy. He did have a long day, a lot of alcohol, and now his stomach was warm and full. He started to nod off towards the end of one of Delic's songs until finally his head slipped and rested on the host's shoulder. For his part, Izaya would probably feel lucky later that Delic was and would always be a gentleman after that. Although he couldn't see the smile on Delic's face, the blond appeared more than happy with this change of events.

After all.

While asleep, Izaya could not guard his expressions.

Switching the karaoke machine to a slower, gentler song, the blond moved his arm just enough so that he could pull 'Nakura' closer up against him.

He knew he would have to awaken the slumbering informant soon so as to take him home.

But for now, Delic saw no reason to rush things along.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's Note: In celebration of Durarara! season 2 airing today, here have chapter 3! With more than 8.5k words! Yay for Durarara! Hope you guys enjoy the fic!


	4. Chapter 4

_"Alice:How long is forever?_

_White Rabbit:Sometimes, just one second."_

― Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland -

* * *

_"So, you want to do it?"_

_The question caught Shizuo off guard. Shocked, his hands tightened on Izaya's hips, holding the male still even as those eyes glinted teasingly back at him. Seeming to like the blond's surprise Izaya reached down, pulling out a rather large packet of condoms out of his pocket to place between his lips with an almost coy expression as he pressed up closer against Shizuo's body._

_"Why the fuck do you have that?" Shizuo growled, his expression darkening in disbelief at the change of pace. But Izaya didn't seem to mind his apparent disdain, instead only grinning wider as his free hand reached back down to pull out a small bottle of lube next. Gently he waved the bottle in front of Shizuo's face before he was pulling the condom's back out to speak._

_"Why do you think?"_

_Izaya had known he was playing a dangerous game. He was betting everything he had done up to this point on Shizuo's reaction; all the work he had put in to get him and Shizuo at least this close was on the line._

_But he had wanted to see._

_Had_ needed _to see,_

_If Shizuo could trust that he was the only one Izaya really wanted._

_And when Shizuo's eyes glared in anger, Izaya knew._

_Shizuo had failed to believe in him. Or rather, he succeeded in believing the worst in him instead._

_And it tasted bitter in his mouth._

* * *

Sitting in the back seat of a taxi, Izaya let out an uncharacteristic heavy sigh as he remembered the mistakes of his youth. He stepped out of his taxi, taking in the crisp cold night air, and stood in front of a luxurious hotel's restaurant, rated five stars by food connoisseurs around the world. He was to meet Delic tonight for another exchange of information in return for... entertainment, he supposed. He wasn't looking forward to it as usual. Seeing Delic's face continuously reminded him of his failures with Shizuo back in their high school days.

"Do you have a reservation?" the young man in a suit and tie at the front asked, breaking the informant out of his thoughts.

"It should be under the name 'Delic'." Izaya calmly replied. Delic had no work tonight so he had asked the informant to meet him at this high class restaurant instead for an elegant evening dinner for two.

"Right this way sir." The man gestured to see if Izaya wanted his coat taken in, a gesture to which the informant declined, before he was led to the VIP table. The restaurant was very ornate and classy with soft music playing. There was a light chatter among the guests who were all dressed like the bureaucrats they were, making Izaya slightly stand out on his fur coat. But Izaya was used to this, he did live in Shinjuku after all.

Delic was sitting at the table but when Izaya approached, he stood to greet him. Almost immediately he shooed the server away so that he could hold the chair out for the informant instead.

"Do you feel the most at ease when wearing that jacket, informant-san? We're in-doors you know." the host smiled teasingly.

"Perhaps I wanted you to take it off of me." Izaya played along, knowing Delic would like that.

Delic chuckled as his fingers reached out to lightly grip Izaya's coat before slowly peeling it off.

"It doesn't matter what you wear, I'll want to take it all off eventually."

Izaya could feel his cheeks lightly burn at that. He thought he was prepared mentally for these provocative words but when spoken with that face, Izaya couldn't help but imagine another blond saying it instead.

"I hope you don't mind that I already ordered some wine. The vintage is well renowned for it's produce that year so…"

As Delic sat down, the server was there, quietly showing the wine bottle's label before pouring a sample for the informant. Izaya sipped it for the taste and nodded so the server could pour some more.

"I'm glad I could finally see you like this. Off the job, that is." Delic smiled as he watched Izaya sip his drink instead of checking the menu.

"You just want me away from your window." Izaya pointed out again as he now held the menu so he can avoid feeling Delic's hot gaze on him.

"This window is bigger I believe" Delic laughed as he gestured to the window to the side of them that overlooked the city. "I couldn't possibly deny you that pleasure when it's the one thing you look forward to when we meet."

"Well…." Izaya turned to face the other side instead where he could see all the guests enjoying their meal.

"The view this way I believe… is more to my liking." Izaya smirked mysteriously, causing Delic to look a bit confused. The host had picked an amazing view this time for the informant but Orihara Izaya looked genuinely disinterested.

"Whatever makes you happy, Informant-san." The blond finally shrugged it off before he was reaching for his own glass of wine to sip. However, once he realized that the informant was distracted due to his watching everyone else  _but him_ , Delic tried to snap his attention back to him.

"What would you like for an appetizer? Their lobster bisque is pretty exquisite and I'm quite partial to their scallops too." Delic smiled his very best.

"Ahh…" Izaya blinked, a bit annoyed at the interruption as he was watching a certain couple talk in whispers. Luckily for Delic though, Izaya didn't fight it as he looked down at the menu once more.

"Both sound fine."

"Do you enjoy seafood, Informant-san?" Delic asked, trying to learn a bit more about him.

Izaya smiled. "I like any food that has the personality of the chef."

Delic tilted his head at such an unusual comment before he chuckled. "Even if they are prepared horribly?"

"Well, those are interesting too in their own way. But one can learn a lot about the person who prepared the food if you take the time to notice it. Freshly made entrees are the best kind… so I can't say I much like canned food. Ah, I'm not partial to overly sweet sugary food either though, since you seem to be keen on learning what I like."

"So, no strawberries with cream? Even with a glass of champagne?" Delic teased once more.

"I take it you get those a lot at your club for the ladies?" Izaya lightly jested.

"It's one of our club's specialities." Delic admitted as the waiter came back. The host ordered the appetizers first then their meal once Izaya had figured out what he wanted for his main course.

"That and..." Delic added once the waiter took their orders and left. "It is one of the best desserts out there for eating off of a lover's fingers."

Izaya sighed as he was growing accustomed to veiled provocative comments. "Didn't we already play that game before?"

"It got interrupted." Delic winked.

"Not interested." Izaya did not want to reveal so much personal information if possible.

"Of course. There are plenty of other games we can play instead." Delic remained neutral. "For example…" The blond looked to the side at the couple that Izaya had been watching.

"What's their story?"

Izaya raised his eyebrows. "Story?"

"Their story." Delic smiled innocently back at Izaya but did not yet offer an explanation on the game.

"For instance..."Delic's voice dropped as he leaned forward - his eyes glinting with the mischievousness that Izaya was just now beginning to recognize. "He is a successful businessman and she is trying to get drunk enough to get through what is going to be happening later." Delic's grin widened. "He likes a lot of weird stuff. Once he had her on her knees using her breasts to get him off."

Izaya could feel heat rise up to his cheeks. He sipped at the chilled alcohol to cool him down but it only burned his cheeks even more. He lightly coughed.

Of course Delic would find a way to make the game dirty.

"Your turn~. What's their story?" After getting the reaction he wanted Delic smiled as he leaned back in his chair.

"I had a totally different guess… that the woman or the man… or both of them are married. But not to each other. And they are cheating on their respective spouse partly out of boredom, partly out of loneliness but mostly out of some mid-life crisis as they now want a new type of excitement in their lives." Izaya lightly rubbed his heated cheek with the back of one hand.

"Boo~ Unoriginal." Delic pouted. "You're suppose to spice it up, informant-san."

"I deal with the truth you know," Izaya shrugged.

"In that case I'll just need to find a more interesting couple. How about them?" Delic lifted his chin to direct Izaya's attention to a couple somewhat behind them. The man looked much older than the female partner he had, the relationship looking borderline pedophillic.

"Hmm… the girl is actually a minor, just wearing more makeup to look older. The man is her best friend's dad she's trying to hook up with to earn some extra pocket money. He, however, is thinking of getting rid of her in the Tokyo Bay before his wife finds out." Izaya looked back at Delic and smirked, "Is that spicier enough for you? Or did you want the racy details of their intercourse at night?"

"No need. I could provide those details for you. She probably gives him really good head, I think she's also a swallower. He probably enjoys the power and thrill he gets from fucking her mouth." Delic supplied the reply right away and that only made Izaya sigh in exhaustion.

Luckily for the informant though, the appetizers arrived right then. They were each given a plate with lobster meat in the center before the bisque was then poured on top.

Delic waited for Izaya to have a taste first.

"How is it?"

"Exquisite." Izaya nodded. "The chef is particular about the exact amount of butter and cream being used, it's pretty good."

"Informant-san… I can't tell if you're avoiding my question or you just don't like to talk about yourself." Delic chuckled a bit as he sipped his wine.

"Ah but I did tell you about myself. You're not reading into the right places." Izaya smirked.

"Fair enough." Delic raised his hands in defeat but he continued to smile. He hasn't given up it seemed. True, he didn't like to talk about himself, but by always talking about others, Delic should be able to figure out that Izaya has an abnormal interest in the humans around him - beyond it just being a hobby or his just being a workaholic. But Izaya knew that the host was also extraordinarily keen on observing others and picking up on even the smallest details to make sure he could please his client. He was sure that Delic was slowly cornering him, finding out more about him even as Izaya avoided answering about himself.

After that though the rest of the meal went by rather pleasantly with light conversation. Delic asked a few more questions about what Izaya thought of the food and the informant answered in a way which talked about the person who prepared it rather than the food itself. It was a very strange conversation, Delic thought as he didn't quite understand why Izaya didn't actually talk only about the food but instead always associated it with humans. But he was catching on fairly fast as Izaya had thought he would, the blond finally beginning to pick up pieces about the informant as the evening went on and the elaborate game they were playing only made Delic even more attracted to this man. By the time dessert came he was even insisting that Izaya have a second glass of wine, well aware that he wasn't going to be able to resist having the informant for his own tonight.

A thought which made Izaya's heart stutter a sigh when their check finally came.

* * *

Later on the informant found himself rubbing at his head as he sat on the bed within a beautiful suite with a gorgeous view. At the very least it wasn't one of those cheap love hotels, Izaya thought to himself, as he had been expecting. The place was certainly upscale and seemed to fit the mood that Delic had been trying to set throughout the evening. Izaya could even feel the wine still coursing through his veins, warming him up in an almost exciting way as his eyes moved from the window back towards his 'companion' for the night.  
"Did you want to shower first?" Delic asked delicately as he carefully took Izaya's coat and hung it for him like always.

Izaya bit at his lower lip. "No, you can go first." Before he smiled feebly up at the blond. "I think I need a bit more time."

Delic nodded at that, unquestioning of the informant's reluctance, and went in first. Once he was alone Izaya finally relaxed a little, just enough so that he could lay out on the bed and stare up at the unfamiliar ceiling in an effort to try and calm his pounding heart.

It didn't work.

When Delic eventually came out - still wet and wearing only a bathrobe - Izaya did his best to avoid seeing him. Without saying anything he rushed inside the bathroom and closed the door behind him.

Unlike Delic, Izaya took his time cleaning himself. The bathroom was rather spacious and luxuriously decorated but Izaya took no notice; he had other things on his mind. It wasn't as if it was his first time having sex but it was first time doing anything intimate with someone he wasn't in love with.

"Haha…" Izaya chuckled to himself as the warm water dripped down his face from his wet hair. Was he really in love with Shizuo?

Was Shizuo ever in love with him?

Perhaps it was just them being fools. A couple of foolish teenagers who thought the world was theirs.

Regardless Izaya was truly selling his body for information and his heart wavered at the thought. Perhaps he could still turn back now…

But just as this thought crossed his mind there was a small knock on the door.

"Informant-san… you didn't drown on me did you?"

"I… I'll be out in a minute." Izaya called back as he turned off the shower.

It wasn't even a fuck. They weren't going to go all the way. Izaya kept telling himself that he had done a lot worse for information. Something as simple as a physical exchange like this was a cheap payment compared to the other prices he had paid, yet still a part of his heart lingered on another blond with piercing angry brown eyes that always saw straight through his lies.

'Just once, let me lie to myself, Shizu-chan,' Izaya thought to himself. He wanted to lie to himself and think that this was okay; that he had already let Shizuo go a long time ago. It wasn't as if they would ever get together again anyway so why was he holding himself back? It was silly and Izaya knew it.

Delic was waiting when Izaya finally opened the bathroom door, the blond sitting on the bed's edge facing the door as the raven stepped out wearing only the hotel's bathrobe.

"I was worried, you know." Delic looked concerned as he got up to help steady Izaya's feet, just in case the wine and the hot shower had made his legs weak. "You were in there for so long I thought you might have fainted."

"Ever a courteous gentleman." Izaya laughed, trying not to look as nervous as he felt when he was guided to sit down on the bed.

"Well, I can be a beast in bed if you'd prefer that," Delic winked, the words only making Izaya chuckle and lightly shake his head. As a host, he was trying to make his partner relax, Izaya knew, but the word 'beast' made Izaya think of someone else.

"Alright. How do you want me?" Izaya asked more directly as he looked up at Delic through his lashes.

"Mmm…" Delic smiled at that, one arm reaching out to carefully wrap around Izaya's back so that he could support the raven as he gently lowered him down onto the bed. Izaya looked up at those fuschia eyes once he was settled down, his heart starting to beat faster anxiously. However, Delic still did not answer him as instead the blond wordlessly held the front fold of Izaya's robe. Eyes glancing up, their gazes met briefly before slowly Delic began to open the material up, revealing the informant's pale body beneath with an almost curious expression upon his face.

"Beautiful."

The blond's expression lit up, his eyes taking the image in carefully as though he were wanting to remember how it felt when all of his wishes came true. In return though Izaya felt himself drawing back, the gaze too intense and making him feel more and more embarrassed until Delic suddenly leaned closer in. Izaya flinched at the gesture and closed his eyes when Delic's face drew too close to his own but rather than feeling the kiss on his lips that the raven was expecting, instead he only felt a soft kiss to his forehead.

"Don't be afraid, gorgeous. I won't do anything you wouldn't want and I'll stop any time you ask me to."

Izaya shook his head at that, his expression firm despite the way he continued to physically pull away. "No, keep going." The raven remembered he had messed up last time and he hated the thought of breaking his contract without proper payment again.

Or so he kept telling himself.

Izaya grit his teeth and flinched again as he felt Delic's feather soft kiss on his cheek then his chin, before they began to rain down on his neck. He shivered, the wine giving him a light, buzzing headache and dizziness as he felt Delic's weight forcing the bed to sink deeper when the host moved to kneel on top. The raven took a sharp intake of breath when he felt a fingertip lightly brush against his waist until slowly the hand slipped under his bathrobe.

"No? Not here?" Delic asked, his voice thick and husky next to Izaya's ear as if the small breath Izaya gave was enough to make him pause and reassess if Izaya was okay with this.

"It's… fine. Keep going." Izaya shuddered. Delic had barely touched him and yet Izaya felt drunk with ecstasy. When it was the other blond…. when it was  _Shizuo,_ he would just roughly grab Izaya and bite him, mark him as his, and sharply sheathe his cock inside the screaming teen without bothering to ask for consent. Shizuo never knew how much that had hurt Izaya, since he had never known much about lube or stretching, and Izaya had never told him.

The raven let out a shuddering sigh as he tried to force himself away from his memories.

"I want this." Izaya lied, his arms reaching up so that he could wrap them around Delic's neck to pull him back down. As long as his facade remained strong Delic wouldn't learn more than what he needed to. As long as he remained strong he could forget what he didn't want to remember.

But still Delic looked down worriedly at him, the blond's expression unreadable for a brief moment before he was slowly smiling. Moving his hand back out of Izaya's robes he instead slid it up across the male's exposed stomach to his chest. "You are a liar, Informant-san." Still smiling Delic moved his head to the spot between Izaya's neck and shoulder. There the blond latched on with teeth and lips to start aggressively sucking, earning another sharp intake from the informant that this time seemed tinged more in pleasure than in shock. To accompany it, Delic's fingers began to circle around one of Izaya's nipples, not touching the nub but toying almost as they traced the areola until Izaya's back began to arch up and his nipple hardened from a need to be rubbed. Breathing growing heavy, Izaya felt his mind began to cloud as Delic finally pulled his lips away from his neck to move down towards his collarbone. There the blond began to suck again, earning a stifled groan from Izaya as, at the same moment, his fingers finally flicked across his nipple and began to more firmly rub the perked up nub.

Izaya had never received foreplay to such an extent before. Shizuo had only ever bit him and that was as far as his experience with 'foreplay' had gone in the past. He shivered with each touch and lick, his body confused about the new sensations and unable to react properly. Still though, despite how good it felt, Izaya refused to outright moan - the male even gritting his teeth so that no sound escaped.

Delic could take his body, but the moans at least he could save for Shizuo's ears alone. Yet, somehow this refusal to make a sound appealed to Delic, or rather, it became his own private challenge. His fingers continued flicking Izaya's nipple, teasingly slow, while he finished sucking along his collarbone until a nice, darkened bruise could be seen.

It was the host's first time marking someone since he had been a teenager. Sleeping with women who were married had it's drawbacks for that reason. He couldn't mark them or else their husbands would know. Nor could he very well allow himself to be marked as he never slept with the same woman twice in a row. It was never fun to be fucking someone who was jealous of his bruises.

Pulling his head back now though, Delic looked down at his handiwork with a vague sense of curiosity. He had forgotten the way it looked when someone bore his bites. For now he didn't think he would leave a lot on Izaya but he still enjoyed the fact that he was able to mark up the one person who kept his distance from him.

Licking at his lips, the blond glanced back up towards Izaya's tensed up expression. He still needed to relax though, otherwise this whole thing would just be one bad experience (And Delic never left a client with a bad experience). Leaning down, the host lightly kissed the fresh bruise before he was sliding towards Izaya's unclaimed nipple. There he breathed a hot breath against the neglected nub, watching the way Izaya's chest swelled and his legs squirmed under him before he was dragging his tongue against it. Izaya jolted at the sudden wetness, his eyes opening wide, before he was suddenly arching at a harsh angle as Delic began to suck and play with the nipple while his other hand continued to palm and rub the opposite.

It was a pleasure that Izaya had never felt before, a sensitivity unknown even to himself as he squirmed and writhed and fought down the moans he so desperately wanted to let out. But Delic was unmerciful to the assault, his tongue practiced and lips just as skilled as he sucked and played to his hearts content until finally precum began to squirt out of Izaya's cock. He could feel it growing wetter and wetter, the shaft hard with the lavish attention on his chest and now begging to be touched to no avail. He lifted his hips up, desperate for some friction, to see if he can rub himself against Delic's thigh but the blond only pushed his hips back down with his free hand. "Not yet." Delic breathed out, Izaya's nipple growing cold from the saliva and air that hit it when he pulled his lips away. With no choice, Izaya reached up to cover his own mouth, holding down any sounds he wanted to make as Delic switched to his other nipple - this time teething at it and nibbling the hardened nub. Izaya's mind was blanking out, a heavy white blanket of pleasure settling over himself as his hips unconsciously fought against Delic's hold, struggling in desperation to get any friction on his desperately leaking cock.

It felt good.

It felt good.

It felt good. It felt good.  _It felt good…!_

Izaya's teeth suddenly bit down into his own hand, his hips jolting forward as his cock erupted. Thick cum squirted out across his lower stomach, covering him with his own sticky release as Delic continued to lick and suck until Izaya was finally able to come down from the high.

If Izaya felt dirty, he also felt too good to realize it.

Without a word, Delic moved down. His tongue started to lick up the cum covering him, cleaning Izaya up and sampling the taste with a practiced ease. Although the bitterness would have made him cringe when he was younger now the blond seemed to like the flavor - or at least the flavor of Izaya - as he swallowed the thick cum.

"You haven't cum in awhile, have you?"

Delic asked as he used his fingers to swipe up the rest of it and started to lick those as well. "It's thick, don't you even masturbate Informant-san?" Smirking, Delic leaned forward once his fingers were clean to bite and nibble at Izaya's ear. "God, you're delicious." Carefully he trailed his tongue up behind Izaya's ear to reach the red tip and started nibbling there as well.

"I...I'm n-not." Izaya managed to unclench his teeth enough to speak, shame mingling with the afterglow of pleasure as Delic continued to bite as if he were tasting him.

"Have you ever tasted your own cum?" Delic asked, his eyebrows going up as if curious before he was moving back to see Izaya's face. "Try it and I'm sure you'll agree with me." With that Delic moved to gather what remained of Izaya's cum on his fingers and held them up to Izaya's lips.

"..." Wordlessly Izaya let out a shuddering sigh before opening his mouth to obediently lick those cum covered fingers. He remembered Shizuo used to love watching his humiliated face. His eyes flickered and he cringed slightly as he licked up his own thick cum and swallowed. Then he went back for more, swallowing the finger whole and sucking at it. It almost surprised Delic not only by such a lewd act but because it meant that Izaya was obviously indeed experienced in doing this despite that shy blush on his cheek.

The blond leaned forward, watching the way Izaya's expression changed to a more timid look even as his mouth continued to suck and lick at his fingers. Despite how forward he had been it almost made Delic a little uncomfortable. Although he enjoyed the little show it was apparent that Izaya didn't like it. Without a word before the informant could finish Delic was pulling his fingers back. Izaya's mouth hung open, clearly not done, as the blond smiled.

"I decided that only I need to taste this. It seems to taste better to me than you." Still smiling the blond leaned down to bury his head into Izaya's neck and groaned. His own cock was still really hard but he wasn't sure how much Izaya was willing to do yet. He had been hoping for a chance to fuck those delicious milky white thighs but he wasn't going to do anything Izaya was uncomfortable with. Instead the blond reached down to grab at his own cock and with his face still buried in Izaya's neck began to stroke himself.

"Stay still for a moment."

Delic took in a deep breathe, giving Izaya the feeling he was breathing the informant in, as he began to tease and play with his own cock. It made Izaya's mouth run dry, especially when Delic's breathing began to get heavier. "Just this, is enough." The blond tried to explain between his panting but the thought made Izaya frown.

This...wasn't fair.

Delic was letting him off easy again.

He had failed once again to hide his own emotions. He had let Delic's touches and words get to him. Already he could feel his pride crumbling from his own failures than from anything else as Delic continued to try and finish himself off.

This time he wasn't going to just let this happen.

Delic wasn't going to win again this time.

Heart pounding in his own chest, Izaya shifted despite Delic's request for him to stay still. The blond groaned, his hand which had been on Izaya's hip tightening briefly before that too let go so Izaya can move. Looking up through heated and slightly pained eyes due to how hard he was, Delic seemed like he was going to ask a question only for Izaya to beat him to the answer.

Face steeled, Izaya pushed Delic back, making the blond sit before he was moving up between the host's legs. Surprise registered on Delic's face, this time managing to ask Izaya if something was wrong only to suddenly stiffen when Izaya got a hand on his cock. Fuchsia eyes going wide, Delic watched half in anticipation, half in uncertainty as Izaya moved in closer to finally drag his tongue up the blond's hard cock.

"Nngh..!" Delic groaned then sighed in relief as Izaya's mouth started to suck on his testes. He mouthed them inside and rolled them with his tongue rather skillfully. It was then that Delic realized, 'he had done this before...' which only further confirmed that the informant's previous lover was indeed… a man.

A man who must have done pretty horrible things to him, Delic thought, his brows furrowed despite his growing pleasure as he watched the informant now lick his shaft and use his hand to touch and roll his testes.

He must have been…rough and dominating since the informant didn't seem to enjoy doing these things.

But Delic did not stop him as the informant looked determined to please him. He couldn't help but smile at such dedication and so the host leaned back and shivered, enjoying the service he didn't receive often since women wanted him to please them instead of vice versa. It was a more than welcome change in pace.

Then, once he felt Delic moving back, Izaya glanced up to see that the blond had relaxed before he swallowed the shaft whole. Again he cringed at the taste but he did not stop. He started to bob his head up and down, watching Delic to see where he was sensitive at as he licked a vein. As he had thought, Delic was most sensitive around the base and the tip of the head as Izaya flattened his tongue and licked it. That earned him a moan and Delic's hand reached out to lightly brush back Izaya's bangs so he could see him better. Izaya hooded his eyes up at him then before he swallowed and took the blond back in deeper. Delic's cock was huge. But Izaya was used to overly large sizes as Shizuo's cock barely fit inside his mouth as a teen. It had been a while but he closed his eyes and tried something he had not done in years.

He slacked his jaw and slowly forced the head of the cock deeper and deeper into his throat. As long as Delic didn't move, Izaya should be able to rub the head of the cock with the back of his throat.

"Shit…!" Delic cursed in reflex when Izaya deep throated him, as the host did not expect that at all. His fingers twisted into Izaya's hair as he gazed down. This man! He was full of unexpected surprises! He almost wanted to ask where he had learned that move but he didn't. He knew it wasn't information the informant would provide and most of all, it probably wasn't something Delic would want to know.

Regardless, despite his prude act, the informant was indeed skilled and not unused to sex and that thrilled Delic. There were so many sides of this man that he had yet to find out and everyone of them kept Delic coming back for more..

"That feels heavenly." Delic groaned as he barely held back his orgasm. The informant was sucking him so well, he loved watching that arrogant mouth humbly suck his cock.

"Nngh…!" Delic gasped when his orgasm started to approach. He lightly patted Izaya's hair, trying to warn him before it was too late. "I-Informant-san… let me… pull out! I'm… about to…!" But the raven didn't listen. In fact, he continued to bob his head even faster, ignoring Delic's pleas for him to stop. Delic closed his eyes and shuddered. This was too good. This man was too good at knowing exactly how he liked it!

"Aaah!" The host cried out as Izaya refused to budge and sucked on his cock when Delic came hard, releasing all that pent up frustration that had been building since the moment they had met.

"D-don't! S-swallow!" Delic managed to groan as he came, his hips still moving in and out of that delicious mouth sucking him dry. He shivered as his vision faltered, watching the informant's blushing face who looked up at him a bit surprised. But he didn't swallow and Delic was glad.

Once Izaya was done, Delic quickly pulled out without bothering to rest for his own afterglow. He grabbed the tissue box and hurriedly pulled out a few to wipe the informant's cum-covered lips.

"Spit it out, it's okay." Delic said with a gentle smile as he held the tissue in front of the informant.

Izaya stared at him in disbelief at first before he did so, spitting out the load into Delic's palm. He was used to swallowing. Shizuo always wanted him to choke on his cum.

It wasn't that Delic had a different kink. He must have known. Somewhere along their interchange, the host had realized he must hate blowjobs and swallowing cum.

Unknown to Izaya, he had exposed himself more to Delic than his words ever had through this one night.

Once Izaya had spit it all out, Delic cleaned up his lips with a fresh clean tissue as he kissed the informant's forehead.

"That's better." Delic grinned as he drew back, letting out a small huff of air when he sat back down onto the bed after tossing the tissues away. "Would you like me to ask for a toothbrush from the front desk?"

Izaya wiped his mouth silently and nodded. Delic helped Izaya back into his bathrobe before he leaned over to call the front desk.

Overall, the experience wasn't that bad, Izaya thought to himself. He never had to do anything he hated, everything was done only when he was comfortable with it and most of all, he was in control the entire time. He didn't feel dirty and instead it rather felt sort of nice to be taken care of and pampered.

Delic finished his phone call then wrapped his arms around the informant, pulling him into a hug while laying in bed.

"Let me hold you like this a bit before they come, Informant-san…" Delic mumbled happily as he cuddled up close to the raven.

And instead of fighting it as he had once done, Izaya curled towards the blond and closed his eyes -his earlier nervousness all gone now when he felt extremely relaxed and satisfied.

It wasn't bad, Izaya told himself. Perhaps he could even get used to it.

And perhaps one day, he would be able to forget another blond's warmth in time.

* * *

Delic took a deep drag of his cigarette in the cold air around him as he stepped out of the hotel entrance. The night was still young and the informant had fallen asleep in bed. He must have been quite tired… but for the host, he needed more than just one round. Since he had the room for the night it seemed fine to let Izaya get his sleep. The blond made a habit of never waking up beside the people he slept with anyways.

While digging through his pocket to find his cellphone as he wondered who he should call Delic found himself suddenly pausing as he saw a familiar blond in the streets. The host smirked. It had been awhile since he had seen his cousin, perhaps catching up might be more fun than another quick fuck to satisfy his needs.

"Yo, Shizuo! Long time no see!" Delic called out as he approached him. "How is Kasuka lately? Still earning those billion yen?"

Shizuo turned and frowned. "Er… it's…"

"Delic. Your cousin!" the host sighed. "You used to tell me all your problems back in our school days, at least remember my name once in awhile."

"Well, you've changed your name like five times a year since then." Shizuo scoffed. Delic laughed easily at that as he scratched the back of his head. "Hahaha, that's true. Well, I've been sticking with the name Delic more now, so try to remember that. I'm glad you at least remembered I had changed it."

"Ah. Got it. How's your brothers doing?" Shizuo changed the subject to which Delic shrugged. "Dunno. I haven't gone back home in awhile so…"

"At least call your parents to let them know you're alive." Shizuo scowled, his eyebrows furrowing again as if he was annoyed by the fact that Delic was being a bad son. Delic noticed.

"Had a bad day or something?"

"Something like that. I've been smelling the goddamn flea everywhere and it's been irritating me." Shizuo growled as he dug in his pockets for his cigarette to get rid of his incredible urge to break or punch something. Since he already had his packet out Delic handed him one of his instead before he held the lighter up for him too.

"Flea? Oh, that er… kid you dated in high school?" Delic frowned briefly as he started to recount his memories from when Shizuo used to rant and rave about his boyfriend. Delic didn't even understand why Shizuo even bothered going out with a boy he hated so much but clearly Shizuo was still deeply in love with him or else he wouldn't be so fixated on him. Love was strange like that. But once Delic started skipping school and stopped going home, he got too busy to listen to Shizuo's love problems as he himself had his own predicaments to deal with, and he never got to hear how the relationship ended.

"I remember you used to tell me how much you hated him but you still slept with him all the same, right?" Delic spoke jokingly. Actually, he had no idea if Shizuo fucked him or not but he knew it would get a response from his cousin.

And sure enough, Shizuo gave him a glare that could kill. Delic only smiled, as he was used to his cousin's death glares. He was so easy to read.

"There's nothing wrong with it if you did so don't look so put off." Pausing, the host took in a deep breath of his own cigarette before exhaling slowly out. Since Shizuo seemed so annoyed he probably needed to change the subject. On days like this Shizuo either needed to listen to others or find a way to express himself better. For now Delic decided the latter was probably best. . "You know, today I had one of my clients open up to me so I'm in a good mood. He's kind of like you in that he doesn't really open up to others. He lets you get close only to start hissing if you overstep yourself, kind of like a stray cat. It's kind of adorable actually, he's all pouty and secretive, refusing to let anyone get close. But he has all these scars and wounds from his battles in the alley, I can't help but want to protect him a little. I thought he would never open up to me but I'm grateful that he trusted me enough to, in more ways than one now." Delic winked as Shizuo puffed at his now lit cigarette.

"That's disgusting. You still sleep around with anyone and everyone?" Shizuo shook his head after he pulled out the cigarette Delic gave him from his lips to speak.

"Not just anyone and everyone. Besides, you slept with your...flea was it? You can't judge me if you sleep with someone you didn't care for too."

"Well, I only slept with one, not multiple at once. You even fuck married women."

Delic shrugged not denying it. He laid his hand on Shizuo's shoulder and drew him closer, grinning with his cigarette still in his mouth.

"Since I'm in a great mood, you can tell me all about your problems with this flea of yours. Just like the old days. I'll buy drinks. It'll be on me."

"I don't like your taste in alcohol." Shizuo scoffed but Delic wasn't buying that.

"I never said I'm buying just for myself. I know a cake shop that's open pretty late. You like those fancy strawberry ice cream parfait with pocky sticks right? We'll check out there while you unload your problems just like the good old days and I'll get some milk or something."

Shizuo didn't express it loudly but Delic did notice the hint of his ears perking up and the way his eyes looked just a bit interested in the offer. He was hooked and Delic knew it.

"Meanwhile, in exchange you'll let me tell you about my little stray cat I picked up. He's just so fucking cute, you'd want to take him home too if you met him." Delic's fuschia eyes brightened as he couldn't help but brag about Izaya. Shizuo couldn't help but groan in reply at that. However, he didn't seem to mind listening to Delic's prattle. He was getting a free cake and ice cream out of this after all.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's note: Guys~ we are not telling you what the end pairing will be. I'm sorry but we hope you can still enjoy the fanfic despite the suspense :3 Thank you always for reviews and reading!


	5. Chapter 5

_**"** the saddest thing is to be_

_a minute to someone,_

_when you've made them your eternity._ " - by Sanober Khan

* * *

The first kiss had been an accident.

Shizuo had gotten too close, his fist still swinging in an effort to slam it with all the power he could muster into Izaya. Young and reckless the two high schoolers were out in the middle of ikebukuro, the only witness of their exchange a flickering street lamp hovering a few feet over them. To this day Izaya still doesn't know what it was Shizuo had tripped over but the result had been cataclysmic for them both.

For Izaya it had been the final straw that snapped and caused all of his resistance against his feelings to shatter.

For Shizuo it had been enough of a shock that he was left in a stupor so intense that Izaya had managed to get away long before the blond could even realize he was alone.

The second kiss, however, had been...more complex.

But it had been enough to change  _everything_.

Then, after their third, then fourth… Shizuo began to lose count on how many times their kisses led to something more than he had thought he would ever do with another person.

Just like  _now_.

Hot breath slid down the nape of Izaya's neck, grunts vibrating against his shoulders as the raven clenched up when Shizuo pressed his hard cock right up against his ass. There was only heat and sweat between them, their words scattered into staccatoed syllables interlaced with baritoned grunts and keening cries. Some of it was practiced on Izaya's end, each vocalization perfectly dramatized with a theatrical flare that even a professional couldn't match, while the rest were ripped from his throat forcibly by a teenaged monster. In turn though the raven's heart pounded wildly, his hands clutching desperately onto the hard brick of a random alleyway in front of him with such strength that his fingers were turning white. In exchange, calloused hands slid beneath his red uniform shirt with a roughness against Izaya's skin that left him breathless. They slid across his hips, up towards a slender waist where fingers suddenly clutched down with a bruising strength when the cock pressed up inside of Izaya suddenly pulsed.

Commanded by sheer instinct, Shizuo didn't even try to rationalize his actions. If he thought it was weird that he was so deeply entangled with his sworn enemy he didn't show it. Instead, he was too focused on taking and making that which he couldn't control his own. His breath fell in harsh pants, the blond high schooler's expression almost dazed when he pushed up and Izaya suddenly cried out and tightened up. Although Izaya's black pants had fallen to the cement, Shizuo's pants still rested just barely upon his hips - the fabric pushed far enough down so that he could fuck the louse senseless in front of him.

It was almost like the same primal urge that made him chase the louse to the very edge of the city was the same one commanding his body now.

Thinking and questioning anything that revolved around Izaya was pointless.

To stop Izaya from getting what he wanted, Shizuo was going to take what  _he_  wanted instead.

And now he had found something he wanted more than the sensation of his fist hitting the louse's face.

"Shizu-chan…. _Shizu-chan_...!"

He didn't reply, teeth instead sinking into Izaya's shoulder from over his uniform until skin broke and the metallic taste of blood began to seep through the fabric and into his mouth. Izaya's moan encouraged him, his hips sucking Shizuo in deep with every bone shattering slam of the blond's cock. There were other bruises and cuts all over them, some from their earlier fighting and other's from their haste to get their clothes off fast enough. But Izaya seemed to love it, his whimpering moans begging for more abuse when Shizuo's hand began to slide higher to rub and pinch a nipple that was already sore from the constant rub of his shirt and the wall.

"Harder…. fuck me harder…!" The smaller raven encouraged as if the bruises were adorned medals, the pain his hard earned award. Only Izaya never seemed to be afraid of him and only Izaya seemed to embrace the dark monstrous side that Shizuo struggled to repress.

It was bewildering.

It was confusing.

It was hot as  _fuck_.

Shizuo growled, the sound reverberating deep in his chest. "Stop making those fucking sounds, louse. You sound like a whore." His breath fell as harshly as his words, the sensations sending hard shudders down Izaya's spine when Shizuo brushed up against his prostate.

"You sure know ho- _aaaah_ ….to r-ruin the mood, Shizu-chan." Izaya groaned between his breath as he gazed back at Shizuo. He was just like an animal.

"Besides, I know you like th- _nnnngh_!" The little raven's voice came out smooth, an amused smirk pressed thinly upon his lips when the hand under his shirt suddenly slipped out to wrap tightly around his throat. Shizuo forced Izaya's head back, the angle painful as he began to thrust harder, faster. Growls slipped through the blond's clenched teeth, his expression deeply flushed as he started to give the louse what he wanted. He was just like an animal, the bleached monster wild and dangerous.

Yet it was what sent Izaya's consciousness spiraling in pleasure as the intense heat began to build up between them until with a hoarse cry Izaya was cumming first. The release splattered across the wall in front of him at the same moment that his muscles tightened painfully upon Shizuo's cock. The blond cussed, his hips driving the hard shaft in without any finesse as he took advantage of the sudden tightness to force his own orgasm as well until he finally came in thick spurts inside of Izaya. Groaning, the blond's body slumped, his face burying into the shorter boy's shoulder as his hips continued rocking until he was sure he had gotten everything out. Then the blond took a moment, struggling to catch his breath, before he was letting his hands fall back down to Izaya's hips.

"Shit…." Shizuo cussed under his breath, the situation finally catching up with him and making the flush on his face look more embarrassed than aroused. The word drove a laugh from Izaya's lips even as his head continued spinning from the intense orgasm.

If there was one thing the raven took pleasure in, it was the fact that only he was able to drag the monster out of Shizuo.

"You tricked me again."

Shizuo muttered the words darkly under his breath, looking displeased as he pulled his cock out slowly. Cum was already dripping down Izaya's thighs and it briefly made the blond feel bad until he remembered this was the little shit  _flea_.

"If I remember right it was your dick inside me. How could I trick you into doing that?"

Shizuo scowled, "Hell if I know," before he was stepping backwards until his body hit the opposite wall. Hands fumbling for a moment he stuffed himself back into his pants before he was sliding down with a loud sigh. Across from him Izaya was trying to clean himself up the best he could, at least getting himself decent enough that he could pull his own black pants back up as well.

"At this point we've done it so much I don't think it's very fair that you think I'm tricking you. Unless you're really that stupid that you fall for the same thing over and over, Shizu-chan." Izaya sighed as well, his head rolling on his neck to work the kinks out before he was placing his hands on his hips and staring down at the other teenager.

"I am stupid and it's the only thing that makes sense." Shizuo huffed back, eyes glaring for a moment before relaxing again as he jabbed a thumb towards the corner of the alley in the direction that he lived.

"Need a shower?"

Izaya grinned.

Several minutes later the two were leaving the alley. This time Shizuo's flustered face matched Izaya's though as the raven held tightly onto the blond, the raven's ass too sore for him to even try walking so soon after the harsh fucking.

As the young high schooler leaned onto the taller blond for support, Shizuo wrapped one arm around that thin waist to give him the support he wanted. He could smell the stench of the sweat from the flea, the stench that he hated.

But, for the moment, Shizuo never wanted to let him go from his side.

* * *

The bitterness of the cigarette burned his lungs before the smoke puffed out lazily from the debt collector's mouth, the older male still in his bartender suit as he laid sprawled out upon his bed. He had already kicked off his shoes near his door before he had wobbled over to his bedroom where he could drop onto his bed in exhaustion. Upon landing the blond had immediately yanked on his bowtie with one hand while his other rummaged through his pockets for his last pack of the day, lighting it for that addicting flavor he could not let go no matter how disgusting, bitter and unhealthy it was.

Just like the memory of a certain flea that would not let him go.

"Ugh…" Shizuo groaned as he scratched his head in frustration. The cigarette didn't help much but he did not know what else he could do to relieve that pent up stuffiness that suffocated him. That black inky muck that made it hard for him to breathe.

All of his past mistakes continued to hammer into his chest, reminding him again and again of every blunder he had made.

He was so young and inexperienced.

And Izaya…. he had been too proud.

They were just too inexperienced and fell in love too early. Too easily… Too…

Shizuo let out another sigh as the cigarette ash built up at the tip. He watched the hazy smoke spiral up in the air while he remembered a past he'd rather forget.

_"Shizu-chan, your kiss tastes like ash. Do you have to smoke?"_

Shizuo chuckled at that memory as a teenaged Izaya cringed his nose after one of their kisses back then. Back when the kisses still tasted sweet. Back when Izaya's lips were still soft and warm.

The blond would never admit it, but Izaya was cute back when they were younger. He liked his smiles when they were genuine. And Izaya smiled more genuinely back then than now.

"You know flea, you're the reason why I smoke still… you stress me the fuck out more then the entire world out there…." The current Shizuo spoke to no one in particular as he looked out the window with the grey sky, the pitter patter of rain knocking on his glass.

Noticing how much ash had built up on the tip of his cigarette, Shizuo sat up a bit to tap it against his ash tray. It was already pretty full. He should throw it out soon, but not right now.

Right now, he just… wanted to relax and try to forget it all.

That damn … Delic, or Delio or whatever he called himself now. Talking to him was a bad choice. For the entirety of their time together all he did was talk about this new partner of his and how cute they were. It was so annoying. In hindsight Shizuo was almost impressed he didn't get mad after the first hour. Although, maybe if he had the memories that were rushing in like waves now wouldn't be bothering him as much as they were.

Like the time they shared an umbrella on a rainy day like this while they walked home together. It was one of those rare times that Shizuo wasn't chasing Izaya down and he remembered Kadota looked a bit surprised but did not say anything. He remembered feeling his cheeks burning hot, despite Izaya casually playing it off.

He also remembered the warmth of Izaya's arm as he linked theirs together before taking him away.

And that led to Shizuo remembering how warm it felt to hold him while lying in bed together. Times like those he had wished that sleeping didn't feel like a blink of a second. Back then he had wished he could feel those hours as they just laid in each other's arms, not fighting for once. He remembered Izaya's warm breath on his neck, the soft and relaxed breathing and the heartbeat of another.

And Shizuo remembered how fast that heartbeat could drum, especially when the blond laced their fingers together right after they both climaxed together. And that time when Izaya whispered something that sounded like, "I love you," but when Shizuo's eyes widened and he had asked him to say it one more time, Izaya had grinned teasingly, with a finger to Shizuo's lips, before asking"what did you think you heard, Shizu-chan?" That led to the blond having to stammer what he had thought he had heard while Izaya continued to deny it like the damn flea he was.

Shizuo could remember everything that happened between them.

The good and the bad.

The times that had seemed so precious…

And the times that made Shizuo remember why he had wanted it to end.

Truth be told, the two of them had never been official.

Heiwajima Shizuo had never asked Izaya out even after everything they had gone through.

There were many chances to. There were many times in which Shizuo could have just said, "Hey, what are we? Are we going out?" or "Izaya, do you want to be my boyfriend?" But every time Izaya's dark crimson eyes were on him and the moment was just right…. Shizuo backed away. He was too embarrassed, too nervous to speak the words, and truthfully a part of him was too scared to. Even as Izaya would look up with what Shizuo had thought were wanting eyes, waiting for Shizuo to speak those words, the blond would just back away.

And just like that the moment would fade away.

But he had had himself convinced, that they were fine the way they were. Whatever they were was more than Shizuo had ever thought he would have with another and the knowledge that if he asked for more Izaya could very well refuse him made the blond decide that they were better off that way.

So Shizuo had never asked him out.

Remembering the fears of his past the debt collector let out a deep sigh along with the last puff of smoke, the haze lingering like a bad memory. Honestly, The past was the past. It wasn't something Shizuo could change and he didn't really want to. Even though he had made mistakes, in the end he was better off never being more than what he was to Izaya. After all, it was Izaya who had ruined it all. Whatever Shizuo had  _thought_  they were had been all inside of his head.

Izaya never really gave a fuck about him, after all.

He was just someone for the leech to fuck around with.

One of many that the guy was stringing along back then.

Inhaling sharply, a large amount of nicotine dripped into Shizuo's throat, causing him to sit up so as to be able to cough when he pulled the stick from his lips.

Anger resonated from his stiffened body, his gaze sharp and furious as he crushed the still burning stick within the palm of his hand.

Back then the flea was probably fucking the entire town behind Shizuo's back, all the while laughing at Shizuo's virginity and innocence when he wasn't looking.

Shizuo had wanted to believe back then that those smiles in his memory really were genuine. He had wanted to believe that at one point Izaya did care for him even if it wasn't anything strong.

But Shizuo wasn't a foolish teenager anymore. And he knew that reality was harsh. There were too many slipped up moments, too many accidental admittances from Izaya that had told Shizuo he wasn't the only one in the raven's bed at night. Like the time Izaya had condoms prepared and when Shizuo asked why he had so many, the fucking flea just winked and said, 'what do you think, Shizu-chan?' Or the time when the flea had been carrying lube around in his pocket. That time when Shizuo had asked about it the louse had flat out lied. But by then Shizuo already knew the truth.

Remembering all this, the debt collector rubbed wearily at his tired face with his empty hand, the male's skin feeling rough beneath his touch before he threw the cigarette into the nearby ash tray so that he could start unbuttoning his shirt.

Stupid.

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

He had been so stupid both back then and even now.

Delic's excitement had made him regress.

For a moment he had begun to feel sorry for himself, had begun to imagine again that there had been something between him and Izaya.

The bitterness and regret for his idiocy began to spread through him like a thick tar that could ignite with the littlest flame.

Stupid.

_Stupid!_

Izaya was nothing to him.

Had always been nothing to him.

Would always be nothing to him.

The flea was a disgusting bug.

A cheater.

A manipulator.

A god _damn_  louse who deserved to get stepped on repeatedly.

With his shirt undone, the blond moved to his closet to carefully remove the fabric, not wanting to wrinkle it even in his anger due to the thoughtfulness of his brother to get it for him.

Tomorrow would be another day. Another miserable day.

One day Shizuo hoped he would be cured of his addiction. Not just to his cigarettes but… also to his past hopes and dreams of a genuine love for a monster like him.

For now though, Shizuo pulled his sleep wear on and turned off the lights, hoping for a dreamless sleep in his empty bed.

A sleep where he didn't have to remember the times that made him once feel hopeful.

A sleep where he could forget about any and all desire that lingered for a normal life with someone that could love him as much as he loved them.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's Notes:
> 
> Ruka: Oh by the way~ I had hoped someone would notice and comment/review about Izaya singing "Subarashi no Hibi" Ahahaha... I hope one of you guys noticed it anyway! Here is the long awaited, "Shizuo's side of the story". It's not everything but I hope it solves some of the 'mysteries' :3
> 
> Amee: Thank you everyone for being so patient with this fic's slow updates! The blame's all on me for this chapter taking so long to get out but I promise to try and make the next one quicker. Enjoy!


	6. Chapter 6

**"** _Tears are words the mouth can't say nor can the heart bare."_  - Joshua Wisenbaker

* * *

When tomorrow came, Shizuo found his day to be just as terrible as his night had been. It was like the days before Vorona had started worked with them, days when work had been barely tolerable. But ever since Vorona had been hired the intense rage he'd often feel on the job had begun to appear less and less frequently during the day. Somehow between her, Tom, and himself, the three of them had begun to fall into a steady pattern that worked well between them. Tom would try and talk to the clients, try to convince them to hand the money over before anything violent could occur, and when that didn't work Vorona would intervene. Since the girl could control herself with far more ease than Shizuo could, most jobs would come to an end by her hand long before Shizuo would need to become involved. It was nice being able to depend on her like that. But sometimes Vorona didn't intercede in time or sometimes the client would do something to purposefully anger Shizuo. When that happened, nothing Tom could say would quell the rage that washed over Shizuo.

And today it seemed like everything the clients tried to plead was only incentive for Shizuo to see red.

Sensing that something seemed to be amiss after the fourth body went flying, Tom had them break for lunch early, going so far as to offer to pay for his subordinates meals when the three of them arrived at the fast food restaurant, if only to give Shizuo a chance to calm down from the last fight.

"Did you get enough sleep last night, Shizuo?"

Shizuo's lips pursed at the question, his eyes avoidant as he fixed his gaze on his drink.

"My cousin kept me out late."

It wasn't exactly a lie but it was close enough to the truth that Tom wouldn't question it.

"According to the National Institute of Health, adult males of senpai's age should be getting at least seven hours of sleep. Otherwise, a lack of sleep can diminish your health and affect your alertness throughout the day. Further studies by the Journal of Neuroscience have been demonstrating that lack of sleep could go so far as to destroy brain cells, senpai." Vorona spoke with clarity as she repeated from memory her recent readings.

"Really? It can destroy brain cells?" Shizuo blinked in surprise. That sounded pretty serious.

"Researchers have discovered fairly recently that prolonging the wakefulness in their test animals by a few hours led to the animals irreversibly damaging a particular type of brain cell called the locus ceruleus neuron." Despite the alarming topic, Vorona spoke calmly as if she was reading a textbook.

"Is that a bad thing to damage?" Shizuo's eyebrows furrowed in slight concern. He didn't quite get all the difficult vocabulary but it sounded very impressive.

"They are the cells that help us to remain awake and alert during the day"

Tom intervened then before Vorona can start sounding like an encyclopedia."That sounds bad, Shizuo. Make sure you go to bed early today."

Shizuo nodded grimly at Tom's advice, unaware of how peculiar that conversation probably sounded to anyone listening in. Although Vorona's way of speaking was more formal than he was used to the blond did enjoy her company. She was smart and he liked that. Not to mention she wasn't showing off how much she knew, it was just a matter of fact for her. To make things better she didn't even mind him having so many questions when he didn't understand something.

Much different from a certain flea that continued to nag at him in the back of his mind.

"I'm going to the restroom, let me know if they call our number and I'll help carry the food over." said Tom as he stood up.

Looking up at his superior who was now standing on the other side of their table, Shizuo gave a short nod before moving out of the way and sitting beside Vorona instead. Even though it was still somewhat early for lunch, the place had had a long line when the trio came in. As a result they were having to wait for their food near the back of the restaurant where the last available table had been.

"How many hours of sleep did you say I am supposed to get then?" Continuing the conversation, Shizuo turned to face Vorona who was now staring out the window beside her before Shizuo's question drew her attention back to him. Fingers gripping her cup loosely, the girl looked curiously at Shizuo for a second before finally answering. "Seven to Eight hours, approximately at least."

"Seven?! That'd mean we'd have to sleep as soon as we get off work."

"Affirmative. Perhaps dinner should be prepared before leaving in the morning?"

It was relaxing being able to talk with Vorona and Tom. Neither of them ever said things that angered Shizuo nor did they seem to mind that they were speaking to someone that most tended to avoid at all costs. They didn't judge him, didn't pick on him, and best of all, didn't lie to him.

The type of strong trust and respect that Shizuo had for his coworkers was rare nowadays.

Which was probably why now that they were away from clients, Shizuo could feel the tension and unease in him slowly melting away.

"I don't cook much though. Normally I just heat something up or order out."

"That could also be attributing to senpai's moodiness. A healthy diet and accurate amount of sleep could significantly improve a person's temperament."

Frowning at the realization that his lifestyle probably wasn't the healthiest, Shizuo paused to look down before suddenly smiling as he glanced back up towards Vorona's eyes. "No wonder my brother's always worried." At Vorona's prodding now Shizuo began telling her about the last time Kasuka had come for a visit, his expression more at ease than it had been all day at the memory. It wasn't until he heard Tom calling him to come help carry the food did he finally stop, pausing long enough to ruffle Vorona's hair as he stood before tucking some strands behind her ear with a smile.

"I'll be right back."

Feeling far more better than he had all day, Shizuo turned away from Vorona and the window she sat beside just in time to miss the sight of a certain informant running around the corner of the building.

* * *

Deep down, Orihara Izaya knew it was a bad idea. Meeting Shiki was a normal routine for him, however, Shiki had had an emergency phone call during the middle of it. As a result, instead of dropping off the informant at their usual spot, he had to drop off Izaya where they were at so that the executive of Awakusu could head over to the scene right away.

And where they were at was right in the heart of Ikebukuro.

The very same area where Izaya knew that a certain guard dog was probably working at this time.

But not wanting to appear perturbed, Orihara Izaya bravely waved off his ride as one of the executives of the yakuza grimly turned to his cellphone to scold the subordinates without so much as another glance towards his main information broker.

Letting out a deep sigh, Izaya glanced up at the spiraling buildings towering over him. Ah, Ikebukuro. It was always nice to be back home despite the lingering worry.

Shinjuku was nice and all but it was Ikebukuro that was always the center of the chaos he loved to watch over.

Looking around to survey the area, Izaya made sure that a certain debt collecting trio weren't around before he headed towards a coffee shop he liked. Perhaps he could squeeze in some time to watch humans mingle and interact in a nice corner with a delicious cup of coffee before Shizuo could chase him out...

However, it was just as Orihara had turned the corner to walk down the street towards the coffee shop that he spotted the guard dog. At first, Izaya froze on the spot as he recognized the familiar blond in his bartender outfit sitting by a window in a fast food restaurant before quickly ducking back behind the corner where he had come from. He didn't think Shizuo's nose was that good to be able to penetrate through the windows, given how the idiot always said how much Izaya 'reeked', but one never knew with Shizu-chan. The beast has a sixth sense for these things…

When the information broker peeked around the corner to make sure Shizuo hadn't noticed him, Izaya gradually became more aware of the situation. Shizuo was smiling softly as he chatted and laughed along with his mostly expressionless Russian kouhai. Where their boss was Izaya didn't have a clue but a suspicious feeling in his gut told him that that didn't matter. Before he knew it, the informant's face had hardened as he watched the ungrateful woman take that rare smile for granted. How dare she?!  _He_  had  _never_  smiled like that towards  _Izaya_  at all during his high school life, even when they had actually  _dated!_  Izaya could feel his chest tighten up and his heart squeeze so painfully that he couldn't breathe. His entire body ached like something was eating him up from the inside and slowly killing him . It was cancer. Shizuo was his cancer, a disease and addiction that no matter how many times Izaya had tried to cut off, it would grow back. And it would grow back stronger.

Izaya was seeing red as Shizuo chuckled about something before the informant could feel as if his heart was tearing and bleeding inside of him. How come…. Shizuo had never smiled and laughed with him like that back then? What was it that they had done wrong?

Plenty…. he knew. Izaya knew deep inside that in the end… it was all his fault. If only he had been more truthful. If only he wasn't so scared of failure and rejection. If only he had opened up a bit more…. done less 'testing' to see if Shizuo would believe in him first so Izaya wouldn't have to get hurt by trusting him first.

But trust didn't work that way. When Izaya did not trust Shizuo, of course Shizuo had no reason to trust him back. And without that firm foundation, their relationship was doomed from the start.

But even though Izaya understood it logically in his head, it didn't matter. His heart didn't follow. It never did, always beating a different tune from his head. If only he knew how to cut off his heart, he would suffer less so.

And as Izaya stood there, frozen on the spot as if Earth had stopped moving and time had immortalized, he watched helpless as the love of his life leaned over and caressed the Russian woman's lock of hair behind her ear. Those fingers… had once brushed back his  _own_  raven-dark hair. Just as softly. Whispering fleeting words into his ears for him and him only.

Now those fingers were betraying him.

Izaya didn't know what he saw afterwards.

He didn't remember what he did next.

The world turned dark as the white noise faded away into the distance. There was no more humans on this planet, all of his love for them draining out into a whirlpool of abyssal darkness until nothingness took over.

There was nothing but emptiness and a hollowness in his chest where his heart had been cut away.

Knowing that Shizuo's smile wasn't his wasn't the worst part.

It was knowing the fact that Shizuo had moved on, had left  _him behind_ , that struck the core of Izaya's heart. That he could truly no longer go back to those happier days despite all the heart wrenching grievances he had to endure for years.

When all hope faded away, only then did Izaya realize that he stood drowning in a sea with no air to breathe.

Where did it all began? When did it all end?

Was there a chance to begin with, or were they just doomed from the start?

By the time Izaya's eyes regained their focus, he wasn't where he had last stood.

He had walked all the way to the other side of the city but he didn't remember doing so.

"May I help you…. sir?"

One of the younger hosts who stood by the door asked. He looked pensive, as if he was ready to kick him out as their establishment was for women only and this loitering man was obviously out of place.

"Ah… ummm…" it was as if the informant had forgotten how to speak, as the words didn't form naturally. Did he need help? Why was he here?

"Oh, he's with Delic." Another host intervened when he recognized the informant. He walked over in an apologetic voice, "Sorry sir but Delic-san is currently busy helping the floor…. his appointment can be made for a later time but…"

Izaya's eyes wandered towards the center where he could see Delic mingle with his coworkers as they celebrated an occasion with the ladies.

Did he… come to see him? Why would he?

Izaya frowned to himself. This was ridiculous. He wasn't one of those women who bought pity.

"I must have mistaken the time. Sorry." Izaya turned to leave when he heard a familiar voice call out, "Ah! Wait."

He turned to see another Shizuo with pink shades and a smile he had longed for from a man in a bartender suit rather than white.

"I can take him. It's rare for him to come so early during the day."

Delic's smile radiated at Izaya, giving no sign of his recognizing anything being amiss with the informant. But he knew. They both knew.

If the informant was going to visit him he would always at least text Delic before.

However, with the hollow still aching in Izaya's chest, there was something welcoming and warm to the host's presence. Perhaps that had been why he had wound up here, as if drawn by the sun. With no other alternatives Izaya followed Delic quietly and numbly down the wall, barely listening to whatever small talk the host used to break the silence until they reached his private room. Then, once there, Izaya sat down onto the plush leather seat and felt his whole body succumb to the pain.

Delic in the meanwhile, had stopped talking now that they were out of the view of others. Without a word he pulled out a stronger bottle of liquor for these occasions, a 25 year old scotch hidden behind one of the drawers and one glass, filling it as much as he could without spilling before making his way to the informant.

Worry gnawed at him.

If the fact that 'Nakura-san' had showed up without previous word wasn't enough alarm, the informant looking as if he was dead inside was.

His face was pale and his eyes stared blankly into the distance as if that once animated and passionate man had shelled himself deep inside in a cocoon to try to protect what fragile heart he had left.

For once emotions were playing unhindered across the informant's unmasked face but Delic found it impossible to read.

Only one thing was certain though..

Delic had seen that kind of expression before among his clients who were so heartbroken, they were beyond tears.

The host gritted his teeth and his eyes grew determined. Whoever it was the informant still ached for would pay for the damage he had done.

"Drink."

Sitting down beside the informant, Delic offered him the glass while his free arm wrapped around the young raven's waist. However, given the broker's shocked state it became apparent he couldn't hold the glass let alone lift it to his lips. Frown gracing his handsome features, Delic held the glass for him, letting the informant slowly take in a mouthful before setting it down.

There never were any words a person could say in these kinds of situations.

Were it anyone else Delic might have tried,  _"He isn't worth it."_  or _"You deserve to be treated better than this."_ or even  _"If he can't realize how brilliant you are then forget about him."_  could have worked.

But for the informant, he couldn't. He  _wouldn't._  His heart wouldn't allow him to say such unfeeling things.

Because just as the informant ached, so did Delic. He didn't like it. He didn't like realizing that for the informant, he felt something more than his normal host-client relationship. However, it was too late. This information broker that he had once casually contacted out of pure curiosity had grown in importance to him. And now this little stray cat he had picked up made Delic feel an affection that he would have normally avoided so that Delic could not just abandon him.

Not now.

Not like this.

"Informant-san, would you like a distraction?"

The informant dumbly turned his face to stare at Delic's concerned fuchsia eyes, knowing that they weren't the honeyed colored eyes he wished for.

"Yes, that'd be… nice." the informant lowered his gaze as he invited Delic. A distraction would work just fine right now.

"I don't know any other ways to make you feel better… or forget about your current pain, informant-san, besides what I am best at." Delic offered as he gathered the informant into his lap.

"Izaya. My name is Orihara Izaya." the informant finally said his name as he sadly looked down to gaze into Delic's as if he was about to break apart any second. There was a moment when shock registered within Delic's expression, his hands tightening briefly upon Izaya's hips at the sound of his name.

Somehow, finding out the mysterious informant's name under these circumstances felt….wrong.

Forcing a smile to remain on his face Delic continued, pushing Izaya further if only to ascertain the depth into which Izaya had broken apart. "In that case, Orihara Izaya-san, can I hold you?" Arms wrapping around Izaya's waist, Delic pulled Izaya closer, using physical touch to try and heal an emotional wound as he always did. However still Izaya continued to shock him when all he received in return was a nod.

"Yeah, it's fine." Izaya closed his eyes as if he was willing to accept anything.

"May I… kiss you?" Delic asked carefully, seeing exactly how far he could go as he kissed the informant's throat.

"... yeah. I don't care anymore." Izaya chuckled softly to himself. "I don't even know why I thought it even mattered."

Delic's heart sank and for a brief moment his eyes closed as his face remained hidden within Izaya's throat. Despite the hurt he tried to share with Izaya to lessen the man's pain, a anger swelled up within him. Unknowingly he understood then why he had been so keen on taking the informant for his own. There had been something sacred in the way Izaya had tried to fight his attentions. And now that the other had been so betrayed that he felt it perhaps necessary to throw away that which had been sacred, it felt as though Delic was losing a part of Izaya that the host had grown to appreciate.

He hadn't been like the host's other clients.

He had still seen something as small as a kiss as a sacred bond between two people.

Lifting his head from Izaya's neck, Delic brought his lips to hover over Izaya's. Although Izaya tensed up in his arms he did not fight to push Delic away or to deny him what the blond sought.

It only made Delic more bitter that someone had broken him.

"No, Orihara-san. A kiss should be a gift from someone you care about. It is far too important to waste on me."

It physically pained Delic to pull away. Izaya was willing, waiting, and he couldn't do it. Not now. Not like this.

Restraining a groan, Delic shifted their bodies to lay Izaya down upon his couch. He could see the surprised look on the raven's face which only served to make the blond more frustrated at himself for refusing such an ample opportunity. Leaning forward, Delic took the glass of scotch off of the table and quickly downed the rest of it as if by doing so he was seeking some kind of strength to restrain himself. Then, once he set the glass back down, Delic moved so that he was sitting by Izaya's head.

Delic had taken advantage of people before. Plenty of times. It was how he had managed to rise to the position he was in today. He wasn't proud of alot of the things he did but they had been necessary and he had tricked himself into believing that the end justified the means.

Even so.

The thought of holding Izaya and taking him for his own when he pined for someone else left a foul taste in the host's mouth.

"I won't watch."

Delic murmured, one hand moving to cover Izaya's eyes while the other began to massage and caress Izaya's hair.

"So, just this once, let it hurt, Orihara Izaya."

Though the host could not see, Izaya's eyes had briefly widened before they closed. The informant was grateful. And in his gratitude, he poured his heart out as he broke down instantly, his body curling up to turn and face towards Delic's stomach as he became unable to hold in the pain any longer. And, in return, the host held him close even as those tears drenched the front of his suit, all the while pretending as though he could not see, feel, nor hear the grief spilling out of Izaya as he hummed a quiet and slow tune under his breath.

He would take it away.

Gods help him he will take this man's pain away.

He will make Izaya forget whoever did this to him and in return, he would be there for him. It didn't matter why. It didn't matter how long it took. He vowed then and there that he would protect this stray that he had grown so attached to. This man who obviously was deeply hurt unfairly and unjustly by someone undeserving of him.

Gently Delic allowed the informant the chance to let it all out, locked in their little rose garden safe from the eyes of the world. It felt like hours later when Izaya had finally finished crying, his eyes swollen shut from all the tears, before the informant began to drift asleep in Delic's arms due to the exhaustion he felt from pouring out years' worth of bottled emotions.

Yet, even as Izaya fell asleep, Delic continued to hold him protectively - giving him the warm support that Izaya had never had before, all the while still humming his broken song.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's note: We hope you guys enjoyed the chapter! Writing Vorona made us nervous WE LOVE HER SO MUCH SO WE HOPE WE DID HER JUSTICE' I also hope our readers don't hate Vorona ;_; We both love Vorona and normally we don't want to use her as 'that girl that gets in between our yaoi ship' trope but we needed a reason for the plot sadly ahaha. (either that or we add an OC) We've had fair number of people blaming Shizuo or Izaya and we hope our chapters sort of explain that it was technically both their fault aha.


	7. Chapter 7

 

 

_If we must part forever,_

_Give me but one kind word to think upon,_

_And please myself with, while my heart's breaking. - by Thomas Otway_

* * *

The night sky glittered with the neon street lights of Ikebukuro, the fake fluorescent strong enough to block out the stars as their light fell upon the earth from millions of miles away. The host let out a deep sigh, the smoke from his cigarette fluttering upon his breath. No matter how much he smoked, the nicotine did not help him calm down this time though for in truth, Delic was pissed.

No.

He was beyond pissed.

That proud 'informant' had been so willing to give himself so cheaply to anyone, even to a host like him. And that had angered Delic deeply.

It probably sounded hypocritical and Delic at least knew as much. Ever since he had been a teenager the host had slept around with whoever was convenient for that night. But he was someone who had been born and bred into a world with a different set of values when it came to love and lust. For him, such a thing as love and the need to protect and save oneself for that love was a ridiculous notion. He had grown to believe that love was like a dream, pleasant yet all too fleeting with the risk of turning into a nightmare when one least expected it. For him, love was a useless waste of time that could only lead to one's downfall so he had never bothered to confront it before. Yet lust, the joining of one's body with another, however temporarily, was another matter entirely. It had been a safe sanctuary where he could experience the joys, the passions, that were often credited to love with none of the risks. Even better, in regards to lust, he was free to take that passion and pleasure wherever he could find it. He was free to experience the best part of 'love' without actually being in love, a notion that suited tokyo's number one host. Women, men, he could have anyone he wanted and come morning he could leave without so much as a good-bye. He expected nothing from his lovers and they in return expected nothing from him.

It was a life he had grown used to, a life that suited the freedom loving blond.

But it was not a life suited to that informant.

Unlike Delic, Izaya had been faithful. He had risked the pain of 'love' and held onto it in the hopes that one day the pleasure would return. But, even after such immense loyalty, this stranger had broken that man's spirit so much so that the informant had lost all self respect to care anymore about what happened to him and his body.

And the informant was willing to …. he was willing to….

"Fuck." Delic spit out the cigarette and stomped on it. He let out another sigh as he walked away from his work towards the main roads. He had just finished up work for the night. Since the informant…, Orihara Izaya as he said his name was, had come during mid-day, Delic bad spent all of his free time with him. But when his break was over, Delic had to reluctantly wake up the sleepy informant and help him into a taxi. He had asked if he could come visit afterwards but Izaya forbid him from it. The entire night was sour for him, yet Delic had done his best to entertain his regulars with his usual smile and care.

"I haven't seen you angry since that one time you got yelled by Tsugaru for coming home late."

Delic turned to the voice to see Shizuo, holding a bag of groceries with one hand, as the other rubbed the back of his head awkwardly. Shizuo had seen Delic walk out of the corner and initially had wanted to ignore him but, he just couldn't when he realized that his cousin looked abnormally pissed. Ever since Delic had 'moved out' (although it was closer to being kicked out by his own parents, at the time the feelings on his leaving had been mutual) he had seemed happier. Delic's parents and his older brother, Tsugaru, were more strict and traditional which had collided with Delic's free spirit. And their youngest, Tsukishima, was an obedient kid, opposite of Delic.

"Ah… is this the way you take to go home?" Delic turned to look at the street sign as if to assess if it had been repaired recently or if it was the same one that had always been there. He had been running into Shizuo more often than not lately.

"Not really. We just finished trying to get back money from a tenant who was in this area." Shizuo shrugged in reply. Glancing back down, Delic was about to ask what Shizuo had in that bag before deciding against it. It seemed to be mostly instant noodles. And he wasn't like his older brother who would have gotten onto Shizuo about eating better.

"So what's messing you up this time? I'll listen." Shizuo half muttered under his breath, his hand finally falling from his head to slip into his pocket. "Since you did last time. Sort of." Although it had been mostly Delic prattling about some new cat or a guy or someone, it did make Shizuo feel better and he knew Delic had been doing his best to cheer Shizuo up.

Delic looked a bit surprised at first, but grinned as he wrapped one arm around Shizuo's shoulder. "Well, Well. I didn't know you had it in you to be so generous to someone like me, Shizuo, That's quite chivalrous of you."

"I'm just trying to return the favor, don't get so close," Shizuo growled but Delic just chuckled lightly. He was used to Shizuo's retorts because Delic understood that Shizuo didn't mean any harm. Shizuo said them mostly because he was embarrassed.

"So, remember that cat I told you about before?" Delic asked as he leaned against the wall next to the alley.

"Yeah, some stray you picked up or something. Had an abusive owner or something?" Shizuo dug around for his cigarettes as he knew this would take a while. He held the packet up so Delic could take one as well, figuring the male looked stressed enough to need another even if he already did smell like cigarette smoke. Delic thanked him and took one before holding it up to his lips.

"You do realize I wasn't talking about a real cat right?" Delic almost frowned as Shizuo gave him a sarcastic smirk that said volumes. It wasn't every day that Shizuo could tease Delic on a topic. Rolling his eyes as his cousin fumbled for the lighter, Delic whipped out his own from his pocket, a expensive looking zippo which had been a gift from one of his clients and lit it up for him. They both leaned forward towards the light, their faces mirroring one another as the fire flickered in between them. Almost in perfect time, the two took a deep breath for a puff of nicotine, the relaxing feeling of the stimulant flooding through their system slowly.

"So what happened to your cat this time? Thought you took care of it." Shizuo leaned back against the wall, his other hand in his pocket as the grocery bag dangled on his wrist while the other held the cigarette against his lips.

"Well, I was planning to. But the ex struck first. Not sure how, but he hurt him badly." Delic muttered as he scowled into the distance. He looked very serious, Shizuo thought to himself. Then again, Delic had never taken it lightly when any women or his clients were hurt by their husbands or boyfriends, even back in high school. It was part of why he had risen so fast as Tokyo's number one host, although Shizuo didn't know that. Mostly because of his own lack of involvement in the underworld and due to Delic not wishing to share the plight of other's lives. However, the women who visited him, the ones who had been regulars ever since his beginning days, were often some of the more mistreated of the upperclass. They had used the host as their means of escape from the reality of their loveless or listless lives and while most other hosts had merely comforted them, Delic had been different. He had given them options. Had given them ideas, and a means to create a new reality for their lives outside of the host's room.

And sometimes, in the more extreme cases, he had even given them a place to hide when they showed up wearing sunglasses and heavy makeup to hide the bruises and cuts.

"How badly?" Shizuo questioned, slight concern in his voice, but didn't ask any further as Delic replied with a simple, "Bad enough." The dark look he wore said everything.

"Love is a cruel mistress," Delic sighed as he rubbed his forehead. "She leaves you in constant pain, with a heartache that can only be numbed for a time before reminding you of the cruelty that is her existence." How many times had he seen situations like this before? How many clients had come to him, wanting to forget but unable to leave their worries behind them? Love, what was the point in love? All it ever did was hurt those involved. Women, men, love did not discriminate. If it is love that causes a man like Orihara Izaya to break, Delic wanted nothing to do with it. Yet, just like always he couldn't abandon the broken heart. Somehow, even more than usual, Delic wanted to numb Izaya's pain. Typically his way of healing was through physical means. If he could reach out and touch the other person, hold them and remind them of their worth, that had often been enough. But he couldn't bring himself to perform the usual 'therapy' to Izaya. It was a rare occasion when Delic ran into such a case, but the helplessness he felt now was more than he had ever felt before.

More than any other Delic wanted to save Izaya. To stitch him back together and set him free from this painful love.

But, the impossibility of it was an even crueler reality as he recalled the way Izaya had cried for so long that day.

"If you talk like that, it's no wonder the guy can't move on then." Shizuo scoffed.

Delic's vibrant and slightly pained gaze snapped towards Shizuo, a scowl on his own face before Shizuo held up his hand as if to tell Delic to calm down.

How ironic that it was Shizuo telling someone to calm down, Delic thought bitterly.

"You want him to move on, don't you? Telling him being in love is stupid isn't going to help any."

Delic paused at that, recognizing that Shizuo was in a way right about that. Recognizing the cruelty of love took time and constant exposure to it's pain.

"What do you suggest then?"

Turning so that it was his shoulder leaning against the wall, Delic faced Shizuo with a curious expression.

"I don't know. Date him, I guess?  _Casually_." Shizuo amended at the slightly aghast look Delic gave him. "That's what normal people do when they try to move on from other people, right?" Shizuo wouldn't know. After all, he had only ever dated Izaya and moving on had been...well, he hadn't ever considered the possibility of dating other people. For him there really was no one else who would be able to look past Shizuo's strength. "Take him to do….whatever couples do…. err… like movies or going out I guess? To get his mind off of the ex." Actually, Shizuo wasn't sure what couples did. He himself never really dated. Izaya didn't really count after all and he had only seen Kasuka go out a couple of times.

"Shizuo, that sounds pointless." Delic raised up an eyebrow that said 'really Shizuo?' "I'm a host, remember? I'm not a good rebound date." Sighing, Delic rubbed at his tensed up forehead, feeling like he was probably getting wrinkles from thinking so hard, before taking in a long and slow drag from his cigarette. "Even if I did do it, I'd want it to be more special. Different. Something extraordinary enough to distract him from….whatever damage his ex had caused."

"Hmmm…." Shizuo got quiet at that, the two of them standing in silence for several minutes as they began to think deeply about it. Sure, Delic could do his usual thing, the roses, the nice restaurants, and perhaps even the usual attention that Delic always showed Izaya but, really, if he was going to break his 'no dating' stance to help Izaya, the host wanted to give more than that. Something truly special. It wouldn't heal the wound of course, Delic knew that he wasn't important enough in Izaya's mind to ever replace whatever damage Izaya had in his heart. But just for those few hours, he wanted Izaya to be 'happy.' Happy enough that afterwards, Izaya wouldn't feel so lost and abandoned. But he didn't know much about the informant named Orihara Izaya to truly know what brought him 'happiness'. Watching over the crowd only did so much.

On his end, Shizuo too thought deeply about what couples did to see if he could come up with something as well. But since he had never had a 'normal' date with Izaya, he had no idea at all…other than what he had seen in movies.

Shizuo tried to close his eyes and think deeper. What did he and Izaya do together often? Other then fucking….

…

…..

…... Shit.

They really did fuck around a lot now that he thought about it. Granted it was all Izaya's fault, always causing trouble and teasing him, forcing Shizuo to get angry enough to chase after him… then when he'd catch up with Izaya, the flea would usually kiss him as an 'reward' and one thing would always lead to another…

"That manipulative flea…" Shizuo muttered to himself.

"What was that?" Delic looked up from his deep thought.

"Ah, no. It's nothing." Shizuo waved it off. Then he remembered. "Ah." Shizuo turned to face his cousin. "There is… one thing."

"What is it?" Delic looked at him curiously.

"Well there was one time… when our class went camping in the woods. We had a log cabin rented out and had a large bonfire going and we had to do all this teamwork stuff…"

"Ah, yeah. Our school did those too. Like going into the dark cave with your partner to get something from the cave for test of courage, right? Those were fun." Delic smiled.

"Yeah… well the flea and I… well, one time it was just us two…." Shizuo looked up to scowl as Delic grinned widely. "Don't think dirty thoughts, you shithead. It wasn't like that."

"Of course not~" The host grinned even wider. Shizuo almost threw his bag of groceries at his face but he remembered that that was his dinner for the week.

"A-anyways. So that one time we were alone together we…" Shizuo's vein popped as Delic's grin grew ear to ear. "Stop that or I'm going to punch your fucking face." Delic chuckled and waved at him to continue. He tried to cover his mouth but Shizuo could clearly see that Delic's eyes were still grinning with naughty thoughts.

Shizuo shook his head. "Anyway! Like I said, it was just us two and we were looking at the stars. You know, it's kind of hard to see stars here and I've never seen the stars so clearly. I think the flea was nervous cuz the bastard wouldn't stop talking. So I told him to shut up and held his hand."

"..."

Shizuo stopped talking then as if the story was done, but, figuring there had to be more, Delic waited and waited…and waited. Until the host asked hesitantly, "...and then?"

"And then what?" Shizuo frowned.

"And then what happened?"

"That's it."

"That's it?! How is that special?" Delic looked confounded. "That was it? Really? You didn't kiss him or fuck him? You just held hands all night?"

"Y-yeah. Well like I said, we watched the stars. It was our first time seeing them and it was sort of nice…." Shizuo mumbled to himself, regretting that he told his story. Delic continued to look at him in disbelief.

"I can't believe it. That's all you did? Hold hands? Really? That was it? You just looked at stars and held hands, Wow, I can't believe you two….That's so sweet and innocent, it makes me feel like some dirty old man" Delic shook his head. Then he peeked up to ask, "...you aren't a virgin are you? I thought you fucked him at least once."

"Shut the hell up Delic before I beat your ass!" Shizuo's hand wrapped up tight into a fist as he growled. But his face had turned red and Delic couldn't help but find that cute.

"Didn't you find it boring though?" Delic chuckled half to himself as he changed the subject back to the date to help Shizuo calm down. In return Shizuo just grumbled as he shrugged. "No… I didn't find it boring."

"Wow, so you two sat there for hours and did nothing but hold hands? Didn't he look bored?" Delic couldn't help but be in disbelief. This whole thing sounded bizarre.

"I don't know… I didn't look at him," Shizuo replied with a shrug.

"Wait, what?"

"I didn't look at him. We were too embarrassed so... we didn't look at each other." Shizuo remembered how Izaya's cold hands had warmed up in his and how nice it had felt..

"So we just both quietly stared at the stars instead. Then after a little while the flea started telling me stories. How this one star is a star crossed lover and can only meet the other once a year, things like that. It was nice listening to him tell me stories."

"Huh…." Delic tilted his head as he tried to imagine not doing anything with Izaya. It was hard…. that informant was adorable and sexy in his own way…. it was all Delic could do to not jump the informant and ravish him to see that shy face contort with need and desires. Delic smiled softly at his cousin then he shook his head again.

"In some ways, you two really are alike."

"Haa?" Shizuo's eyes twitched in irritation at Delic's vague answer.

"You and my cat. You two are pretty innocent in some ways. It's kind of refreshing." Delic chuckled. Since he was always surrounded by women who were either cheating on their husbands or were being cheated on, it was nice to meet a few who were faithful to their loved ones. The host sighed and looked up at the hazy sky with no stars in sight.

"Stars huh…." Delic thought about it. "Alright, thanks Shizuo. This was pretty insightful," Delic leaned over and patted Shizuo on his shoulder. "It gave me an idea anyway."

"The camp was pretty far from here though. At least several hours on the bus…if you wanted to see the stars," Shizuo wasn't sure how it could be helpful, but he still tried to offer to tell him the location. Delic smiled as he pulled Shizuo out of the alley and back to the bustling main streets with neon lights.

"Don't worry, I got a different idea."

* * *

Izaya frowned as Delic walked in the front door of his office with a large bouquet of roses. He didn't even question how Delic had found his office. He had told him his real name few days ago after all, it wasn't too hard to look him up. What made him really irritated about it though was that Delic had now trespassed into his territory. Izaya liked to keep his personal life separate from business…and having Delic come to his office was crossing that line.

"You can't come in just any time you want, Delic-san. I'm pretty busy and you need to make an appointment…" Izaya gave Namie a side-glance since she let him in. Delic just smiled.

"But I did make an appointment. I asked your lovely secretary for your time tonight."

Izaya glared at Namie who just shrugged as she packed her bags to leave. "You weren't doing anything today anyway." Izaya rolled his eyes. He could already guess that Namie must have been bribed somehow. Izaya groaned as Namie said her goodbyes and left before the informant even had the time to click open his schedule. Sure enough, it was filled in for an appointment on his calendar, but it didn't say who the client was.

"Alright, fine. Guess I have to go along," Izaya sighed as he got up, his eyes still sharp and angry. Delic continued to smile at that as he placed the roses into a vase and watered it. Seeing the angry informant told him that Izaya had recovered from that time and that was a good sign.

Izaya didn't bother getting dressed up though. Instead he grabbed his usual fur coat and walked over to Delic. "The usual dinner?"

"Not quite… though we can go eat dinner first if you'd like. It's a bit early for dinner but… I have a feeling you don't eat enough. Did you skip lunch?" Delic asked delicately as he noticed the half finished cup of coffee by Izaya's desk. It was a hunch but…

Sure enough, Izaya looked sideways as he shrugged, "I sort of had something. I could eat."

"That won't do, informant-san," Delic called him out of habit as he wrapped his arms around Izaya. He knew the informant's real name but it didn't quite roll on his tongue right. Not yet. Despite how happy the host was to know his name. It was as if, Delic didn't quite 'earn' the right to know this cat's real name and it made him feel like he cheated in a game.

Feeling Delic's arms wrapping around him, Izaya looked annoyed which in turn only made the host grin even more. The informant was really back to his usual self, at least on the surface. Even if it was probably too early to be fully healed, at least the informant was strong enough today to put on a facade and it relieved Delic.

"Am I allowed to receive my kiss now?" Delic asked, his voice low and husky as he leaned forward. Izaya froze up in the host's arms. True he had consented a few days ago but that was then. Izaya looked as if he wanted to take back his words now, but he hesitated.

"You're too adorable when you get defenseless like that." The host smiled as he brought Izaya close so he could kiss his forehead. "Don't worry, I won't kiss you on the lips, our contract is still intact."

"Well… so what is it that you're here for if not that? If you made an appointment, I hope it's not just to take me out… my time is valuable you know." Izaya lightly chuckled, trying to change the subject.

"You mean I can't?" Delic feigned surprise. Izaya's vein popped.

"I'm not a host or a gigolo. You can't buy my time and body, Delic-san. I'm an informant. Are you here to gain information on someone?"

"Yes." Delic smiled.

Izaya groaned as if he anticipated Delic's next answer. "Please don't say you're-"

"You." Delic grinned as he leaned forward. "I'm here to gain information on you, Informant-san." Delic lightly caressed Izaya's cheek and watched the informant flush. He was so beautiful.

"My personal information isn't for sale," Izaya bristled like an irritated cat.

"Well, let me at least take you out for dinner. You know I won't be taking a no for an answer and I know you don't have anything going on for the rest of the day. Just this once, let me take you on a date. Besides… I think you need dinner." Delic gave Izaya some space as he loosened his arms around the informant but gently led him towards the door still. Izaya sighed as if he had a headache, but didn't fight it as Delic led him outside to the taxi.

"So, may I call you Izaya-san or should we keep it to Orihara-san?" Delic asked once they were in the taxi.

"Whatever you want," Izaya shrugged as he looked out the window again. He was already regretting what he did a few days ago. Not just about giving the host his real name but also the fact that he had cried in front of him. He had never shown such a vulnerable self to anyone else before. Not even to Shizuo. Just thinking back on it made his cheeks warm with shame and anger. He had known he would need to see Delic again eventually, but he had been avoiding it in order to keep from experiencing this shame again. But now that he was forced to see him so much earlier than he had anticipated was taking a toll on Izaya's disposition. Somehow knowing this, Delic gave him space, at least while they were inside the taxi.

"Then, Izaya-san." Delic decided. It was right in between intimate and formal. "I guess Izaya-kun, would be too early huh?"

He could see Izaya's back stiffen up and he chuckled, thinking his joke went through. The host had no idea what kind of effect the name 'Izaya-kun' had on him, especially with a certain debt collector's face, but it was amusing to assume that he just didn't like the intimacy the name implied. Settling back, Delic allowed silence to wash over them as Izaya continued to stare stubbornly out of the window until they arrived.

The dinner was at an elegant sushi restaurant inside a five star hotel. Delic's etiquette was exquisite as always, as he was the perfect host, with the exception of a few dirty comments sprinkled here and there. But at this point, Izaya expected them.

After their early dinner, Delic took him to a coffee cafe and sat by the windows. The host didn't initiate many conversations and mostly left the informant to himself as Izaya enjoyed looking out the window to observe his beloved humans. It was almost weird that Delic wasn't actively trying to have all of his attention but it was nice and relaxing for Izaya who was doing everything he enjoyed, but with the company of Delic. A few times Izaya could see that the host looked as if he wanted to reach out and touch him when he thought Izaya's attention was somewhere else. There was a nervous twitch of the host's hand that was barely noticeable, as if the non physical touch was almost painful, and he was doing his best to endure and for that Izaya was grateful.

However, unable to keep silent for long, Izaya stood up suddenly. Before Delic could protest or respond, Izaya crossed over to sit next to the host instead of sitting across from him, much to Delic's surprise and delight. Smiling softly, the blond placed his head on Izaya's shoulder and closed his eyes to enjoy the warmth of Izaya a bit as the informant continued to look out the window, his fingers casually brushing away a few strands of blond here and there.

It was calming and peaceful just to feel each other's warmth and share each other.

It wasn't until a couple hours had passed in this way did Delic finally stir. Curiously, Izaya looked over towards him to figure out what was going on as Delic stood up. After stretching slightly, Delic extended his hand towards Izaya as if to help him up as well. "There's one more place I'd like us to go to." It was a simple explanation that offered no actual information in regards to Delic's plans, but for some odd reason Izaya felt trusting enough to allow it.

"What else is there to do?" The informant asked as he took Delic's hand and allowed him to pull Izaya up. Once on his feet, Izaya was hard pressed to fight down a grin as he realized it took all of Delic's self control to not wrap his arms around him right then.

"You'll see." Delic's hand fell down, fingers brushing against Izaya's before he had to consciously resist grabbing it as he turned to walk out of the cafe. After making sure everything was paid for, Izaya followed after him to find that the blond had already hailed down a taxi.

"Lets go."

Once inside the taxi Delic started to pull his tie off. Sighing, Izaya stared at the host with an incredulous expression as he held the article of clothing out with a grin. "One last time." Delic promised as Izaya silently accepted it when the blond reached up to tie the thin article around his eyes to make sure the raven wouldn't see where it was they were headed.

"I'm starting to worry about where you are taking me." Clicking his tongue in annoyance, Izaya sat back as Delic gave the driver whispered directions.

"What kind of date would I be if I didn't let you feel the thrill of a little danger?" Izaya heard the blond chuckle as he leaned back into the seat to wait for their arrival.

"Do you blindfold all your dates or am I just special?" Izaya asked sarcastically only to roll his eyes at Delic's answer, "Normally not until we get to the bedroom."

The ride was shorter than Izaya had expected. Delic seemed to have had all this already mapped out so that he was sure no time was wasted. When they arrived at wherever it was they were going, the blond was quick to help izaya out of the cab, not taking the blindfold off of the raven even once they were inside of a building. Straining his hearing, the raven tried to listen for other people to get some clue as to where they were but what chatter he could hear all blurred together until finally all voices were cut off as a door closed behind them.

"Can I take this off yet?"

Impatient, Delic reached up towards the tie only for Delic's hand to stop him. "Two more minutes." the blond's voice could be heard moving away from Izaya as he leaned over something. A few seconds passed until suddenly what little light Izaya could see through the cloth vanished. A moment later and Delic was moving Izaya to get a good view as slowly the tie came undone from around his head.

At first, Izaya could not see anything despite the cloth being removed. It was pitch black dark save for a neon exit sign in the far corner.

"Where are-" Izaya started to ask before the words were caught in his voice in a gasp.

Suddenly the dark skies were lit up with brilliant stars and galaxies, the sparkling Milky Way shooting across above.

"Delic?" Izaya asked in wonder before he couldn't help but smile. "Really? A planetarium?"

"It's the closest I could get to the real thing." Delic started to explain in a sheepish voice, but the host froze as he noticed the informant's eyes well up and tears began to suddenly roll down his cheeks.

"Izaya-san?"

"I…Haha, sorry. I don't know what came over me," Izaya apologized as he quickly wiped his face with the back of his sleeves but Delic was already holding what appeared to be a handkerchief out towards him. Quickly Izaya took the fabric from him and began to try and dry up the tears, not wanting to think about the broken promises from his past.

But, despite Izaya's quick dismissal, the host knew instantly why the informant was touched. It wasn't because of him. It couldn't be. Delic knew right away that Izaya was thinking of someone else, not him. The realization of this caused Delic to feel a strange tinge of pain in his heart that he refused to believe was jealousy, but - rather than fixating upon this bizarre emotion - the forever perfect host, Delic held Izaya's hand and led him to a seat where the informant could see the center of the universe.

"I'm glad you like the place enough to be so moved," Delic teased as he played the moment off. He knew the proud informant probably wouldn't have liked being dwelled on concerning his sudden burst of emotions once more.

"Guess I can't say now that I find stars rather boring?" Izaya relaxed into the leather seats and chuckled to himself. He was showing a lot of embarrassing moments to this host, but at least Delic knew enough to not take advantage of it. It was because of this Izaya could relax even if the host saw several of these shameful moments and why Delic was such a perfect host.

"Not unless you want to tell me that the tears are because you adore my touch so much." Delic joked as he sat down in the seat beside Izaya before changing the subject for Izaya.

"So, if I'm correct," Delic looked back at the swirls of synthetic stars in the sky, "Tanabata is celebrated because of those two people lingering in the sky." Delic's fingers intertwined with Izaya's. "Because Orihime and Hikoboshi up there," the host pointed at the two stars that gleamed brightly, "couldn't help but fall in love and neglect their duties. Orihime's father was furious at her behavior and separated them." The host shook his head, "and I believe Orihime cried at this until the Magpies came to make bridge so that they can see each other on top of the Milky Way river." Delic chuckled, "One of those, 'love will find a way' stories, right?"

"Actually, the Chinese Star Festival is different from the Japanese one." Izaya was intently looking up at the sky with a small smile. "It's a similar story but in that version…" And so with just that the informant started to explain the differentiation between the Japanese version alongside the Chinese and the Korean. Afterwards Izaya started to talk about the constellations and their stories all over the world, from the Greek's mythology, the Romans, the Norse, the Egyptians and even to some obscure theologies and others that Delic couldn't quite follow along with, but since he enjoyed the sound of the informant's voice he chose not to stop him. Delic always knew that the informant was well knowledgable but it was almost as if the informant had studied so much when it came to lore that he could have gotten a doctorate degree in ancient mysteries.

"You really know a lot of mythology, Izaya-san," Delic couldn't help but chuckle. "I feel like a child talking to a professor."

"I happen to have a particular interest in mythologies, especially in immortalities." Izaya leaned his head on the host' shoulder as he spoke. He could feel Delic's hand caressing small circles on his. "It's interesting to see what lengths the powerful men in history have done to defeat death. I found them to be fascinating."

"Do you find death fascinating, Izaya-san?"

"No." Izaya closed his eyes. "I find life to be most fascinating. The struggles of mankind and how much they hold onto life, clinging onto it desperately before Death eventually takes them over…It's an intriguing concept."

"Do you wish to live forever?" Delic asked curiously. "Even if every day is painful?"

"Do you?" Izaya turned it around and asked.

"Not really. I chose my lifestyle knowing it would lead to my downfall. To fight for it to be otherwise would be foolish in my case." Delic replied heavily.

"I...would fight until the bitter end," Izaya sighed softly, finally giving Delic his answer now that Delic had given his. "No matter how painful life is, I won't give up so easily."

Delic didn't ask anymore as Izaya enjoyed the warmth of his company. Part of him knew that Izaya's answer wasn't simply about life and death but he was partially speaking of his ex. And Delic felt a bit frustrated but relieved that it meant that Izaya won't continue to be broken. He would fight back.

Even though he knew they did not have the room rented for long, Delic did not have it in him to let go of Izaya's hand.

For now, he wished to stay like this for as long as he could.

* * *

Shizuo didn't know why he was so nervous. The young high schooler had been with Izaya before when no one else was around. But, somehow, this moment felt different as the two of them waited beneath the stars. Izaya seemed to be feeling it too as the male prattled on beside him, their gazes never meeting as the seconds ticked by. He couldn't really understand what Izaya was saying, something about their classmates and how funny their faces were when Shizuo had snapped that tree in half as he tried to get Izaya out of it, but he really didn't want to think about it anyway since his anger embarrassed Shizuo. The only good thing about it was that it at least worked in getting Izaya down. After that the two of them had run off and it was Shizuo's assumption that no one wanted to risk a broken arm or two in order to come and stop their 'fight' that allowed them their privacy since, once they were a safe distance away, Izaya had immediately stopped - a subtly sweet grin on his face that made Shizuo's heart freeze briefly in a love-struck panic. Without really knowing what was going on, the blond had approached Izaya then in a much more calm state before following behind him to sit against a tree as they caught their breath.

"I think that girl who sits in front of you in class is getting ready to ask for her seat to be changed." Izaya chuckled lowly, his words making Shizuo scowl before he elbowed the teen slightly.

"It's your fault anyway, shitty flea." Sighing, the blond let his body fall down slightly, his shoulder brushing against Izaya's briefly. "Your ankle okay? You seemed to land on it pretty hard." Voice going softer, Shizuo looked down Izaya's outstretched legs towards the ankle in question.

"Wh-what? Of course I'm fine, who do you think I am?" the smaller boy scoffed with a flush on his face. When Izaya replied, his voice had seemed to have gone higher, nervousness laced in it as he quickly dismissed Shizuo's concern as unnecessary.

"By the way, Shizu-chan. I noticed that our English teacher is probably going out with our History teacher, have you noticed them exchange eye contact?" After that Izaya changed the subject quickly, going back to their classmates, a few gossips and some of the things he had observed them doing that day. Shizuo tuned it out for the most part, his amber eyes gazing up through the leaves towards the sky until he felt Izaya's hand brush against his. Curiously, the blond looked down towards them, noticing that Izaya had quickly moved his hand to his lap after that as if it the brush was an accident, although his words hadn't stuttered. Sighing slightly, Shizuo straightened back up, his hand reaching out to take Izaya's in his own while he turned his body slightly away so that Izaya could not see his pink tinged face as the blond laced their fingers together.

"Shut up, Izaya."

Shizuo could almost hear the way Izaya's mouth snapped closed, those beautiful crimson eyes widening briefly as the male's hand went limp in the blond's own. Shizuo fiercely looked back at the sky just so he could be sure that Izaya wouldn't see his face as the blond looked up towards the stars.

They had been 'dating' for several weeks now, but it was actually very rare for the two of them to be alone. At school, Shinra was always hanging around and their classmates were everywhere, while at home Izaya had his sisters to take care of and Shizuo had his brother. Plus it wasn't really like the two of them were open about….'this' enough to warrant telling other people to leave them alone. As it were, most people feared allowing the two to be alone in the same room, which was kind of understandable.

But…..at least this much was nice.

Slowly Izaya's hand began to close around Shizuo's, his hold as cold as the night air around them. It made Shizuo hold on tighter, as if by doing so he thought he'd be able to warm the young teen completely up. Minutes passed in silence then until finally Izaya's soft voice broke through.

"You know Shizu-chan?" Izaya's voice cut the cold night air's quiet save for the chirping sound in the grass. "That's Orihime, the star that's shining brightly to the left." Shizuo looked in the direction Izaya pointed. "And that star across the Milky Way is Hikoboshi."

"Oh, that's the... story I heard when I was a kid. They can't meet right?"

"Only once a year on a clear day. When it rains, the magpies can't form a bridge, and they will have to wait another year to meet again."

"That's pretty sad."

"...Yeah. That's pretty sad isn't it? Even though they love each other, they can't meet no matter what because there's a river separating them."

"I think that Hikoboshi guy should just build a real bridge." Shizuo huffed and Izaya laughed.

"He's a cow herder. He doesn't know how to build bridges. And Orihime is a weaver. She only knows how to make clothes."

"Well, I'd probably just knock down a tree or something to use as a bridge."

"...you would?"

Shizuo dared not to turn his head to see if Izaya was staring at him. He couldn't meet him in the eye even if Izaya was.

"Yeah...I would. I'd do anything to build that bridge across the river if I loved someone and couldn't meet them at any time I wanted."

"..."

Izaya did not say anything to that, even if the story went, that Orihime had cried until the magpies came to help, which negated that Hikoboshi ever really needed to build a bridge. Or that Orihime's father had forbidden her to meet him except once a year. That all didn't matter to Shizuo, and Izaya knew that. He could feel his heart squeeze tightly and painfully and he didn't understand why anymore than he could understand the happiness welling up inside of him.

"Yeah...you would." Izaya simply said.

Shizuo remained quiet at that, his hand still holding tightly onto Izaya's as he stared up at the two stars in question. The quiet of the forest surrounding them returned, enveloping them in a soft atmosphere as the two of them mulled over the situation before Shizuo finally spoke again.

"He probably thinks about her alot."

Unconsciously, Shizuo's thumb rubbed lightly against the back of Izaya's hand, a type of sadness swelling inside of his heart as he realized how painful it must be. Even if he did say he'd build a bridge, there was still the days that Shizuo would have to go without seeing the one he loved in between.

Without seeing Izaya.

It felt...lonely to think about.

It felt unbearably lonely.

Shizuo squeezed Izaya's hand again, this time noticing that it had grown warmer. Although he still refused to look at the raven he could hear the way Izaya drew his legs up to his chest, his head falling to hide in between his knees as he slowly returned Shizuo's squeeze.

Feeling his face grow hotter Shizuo kept his eyes fixed stubbornly upon Orihime, before finally whispering under his breath.

"Thanks."

Izaya probably didn't know what Shizuo was thanking him, even the blond barely knew if he was thanking him for the story or if it was for something else. Something more personal. Something that Shizuo hated to talk or think about it, but that Izaya understood best of all.

Yet, it lingered between them even as the night continued around them, leaving the two behind in their private world, until the feeling of Izaya's hand loosening told Shizuo he was growing drowsy. Without a word the blond finally scooted close again, using their joined hands to pull Izaya in who readily allowed his head to fall onto Shizuo's shoulder with a soft sigh. In turn, Shizuo let his head fall gently on top of Izaya's, the blond not exactly sleepy but willing to do anything so as to feel a little closer to the other male. At the touch, Izaya nuzzled in closer, their joined hands moving to rest in Shizuo's lap as both their hearts began to beat in a rapid, familiar pattern. Faces red, both males still refused to look at each other as the cold night drifted on, threatening them with the upcoming morning when they'd have to separate just like the two star crossed lovers, Orihime and Hikoboshi.

But at least, until then, their own worlds could stand still in the palm of each other's hand.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's Note: Sorry for the delay, but as always thank you for staying with us and we hope you enjoyed this chapter! Thank you again for all the reviews as well! We really love reading them! We hope that you guys enjoyed the irony of Delic and Shizuo's exchange ahaha and that this chapter will make many of you agonize over the bittersweet moments and who Izaya will end up with 'eventually'. Until then, enjoy the journey with us. If this story makes you flip flop between ships, we're doing our job right fufu.


	8. Chapter 8

_Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured. -_  Mark Twain

* * *

"RAAAAAAAGHHHHHHHH!"

A loud cry echoed through the otherwise normal Ikebukuro streets. The sound was like that of a monster's roar, it's echo lingering in the air until a loud CRASH abruptly cut it off. Across the street a wall caved in with no warning, brick and mortar falling and nearly landing on the otherwise uninjured head of a man so deep in debt that the cost of his upcoming hospital bills for his broken body will seem like pennies in comparison. The sight, while understandably unusual to most normal Tokyo citizens, did not seem to phase those passing by however. In fact, rather than running from the scene, a good number of people paused instead to whip out their cell phones - the devices zooming in on a blond clad in a bartender suit who stood with a heaving chest in the direction the now unconscious man had flown from.

Gossip erupted as everyone's eyes watched the way the tendons within the blond's neck bulged, his hands clenched into shaking fists as a tanned male stood caressing his forehead beside the bartender. Chest heaving from exertion, the angry male remained frozen despite the sudden attention in the position he had assumed upon throwing the broken man with wild eyes and a nose curled in disgust.

But it wasn't out of disgust for what the man had said nor was the face caused by the situation the debt collecting team had walked into. Rather, the disgust one Heiwajima Shizuo felt was for no one but himself.

It was a disgust for the curse of his own strength that everyone else only saw as a blessing.

Upon feeling a hand upon his shoulder blade, Shizuo finally straightened back up. The anger that had been coursing through him almost dissipated completely as he turned to face the petite blonde female that traveled now with him and his employer. Shame and disgust coursed through him, Shizuo's displeasure at his lack of control apparent as he pushed his sunglasses up and avoided her gaze.

"..."

The apology Shizuo couldn't quite speak hung between them before Tom sighed and began to usher the blonde duo away from the scene. Thankfully no one had recorded Shizuo's actual throw so there would be no charges pressed against him, but it was always best to not linger when this happened. Feeling his stomach churn, Shizuo slowed his own speed down so that both Tom and Vorona could walk in front of him, the male feeling so distraught that he couldn't bring himself to be near them for the time being.

It had been a really long day.

Actually, it had been a rather long life. And while some days were better for Shizuo than others, it had seemed as though lately the noticeable lack of a certain flea that often plagued him had made the last few days somewhat better than usual.

It was just  _today._

Today, something didn't feel right.

Something heavy seemed to sit in the very air of Ikebukuro, the stench infiltrating the city with a stink so toxic that the scowl upon the blond's face was beginning to become a permanent fixture.

"...something stinks…"

Neither Tom nor Vorona replied to Shizuo's observation. He hadn't really expected them to anyways. It seemed that there were some things he could smell that no one else ever really could. Still, it'd be nice if Tom would at least take them to a client that was further away from the stench rather than closer to it. After all, Shizuo hadn't been sleeping well lately and the lack of it when combined with the smell was driving him positively wild.

"Fucking stinks…."

Just as the words left his mouth, the sight of a young man further up the street caused Shizuo's vision to tunnel. The trio had stopped at a crosswalk and neither Vorona nor Tom seemed aware of the quickly brewing violence behind them. Heart pounding in his ears, Shizuo pushed past them if only to confirm his sights while cars honked around him.

"IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII-"

A fur-lined jacket disappeared behind a building.

"ZAAAAAAAAAA-"

Led by a head of unruly black hair.

"YAAAAAAAAAA!"

And dark red eyes that could match the blood boiling in Shizuo's very veins.

The way that Shizuo grabbed the 'do not cross' sign beside him was almost unavoidable. Certainly, neither of the two with him, upon realizing what was happening, tried to stop the blond as the metal groaned under his grip before finally being ripped out of the cement at the exact same moment that Shizuo's feet dug into the ground for leverage and he pushed forward. Cars slammed on their brakes to avoid hitting him, but Shizuo didn't care as the only thing on his mind was the echo of the words  _KILLKILLKILLKILL_  as he chased after the only one he had to blame for his ruined life. Yet, despite the shout, Izaya seemed unaware of his impending death. If Shizuo had had any awareness to his own surroundings he might have noticed that Izaya himself looked equally as tired as Shizuo felt. But the only thing he was really aware of was how to catch up to Izaya before the other could escape.

Feet skidding along the sidewalk Shizuo turned the corner Izaya had just vanished around, the blond's shoulder slamming into the wall of a building before he could use the force to propel him forward towards the still oblivious informant. Red covering his vision, the steel beneath his hand began to crumple as a growl reverberated within his chest.

"Izaaayaaaa-kuuun!"

That seemed to finally do it as Izaya's head whipped around behind him. Shock and a flicker of disappointment appeared briefly upon his face before he was bolting away. Normally it was easy for the flea to escape, but today there was a lag to his reaction - the male's body appearing stiff from weariness as he rushed to find a route that could safely get him away. His savior appeared in the form of a large trash bin, Izaya quickly using parkour to propel himself towards the metal angel to pull himself up onto it's closed lid. However, before he could grab at the nearby fire escape, Shizuo was hurling the sign he had grabbed earlier so that the metal cut straight through the trash bin and crashed into the dead end on the opposite side. Although it had done little to hurt Izaya, the force of the strike on the trash bin caused it to roll forward, making Izaya lose his balance just long enough for Shizuo to grab at his ankle from over the edge.

"You've had enough warnings, louse!"

With that Shizuo was yanking Izaya back, forcing the male off of the trash bin only for Izaya to twist and free himself from Shizuo's hold moments before he landed on the hard cement.

"Ah, Shizu-chan…"

A flicker of a pocket knife caught Shizuo's vision. A moment later and the blade was held before him, keeping a safe distance between their two bodies while Izaya hastily pulled his fur-trimmed hoodie up to cover his head with his free hand. "Mind letting me off the hook today?" Even though the sight of the knife was hardly surprising, the need for Izaya to cover his neck and face did surprise Shizuo. He faltered in his reply as mocha eyes finally took in the sight of the man panting roughly, the man responsible for haunting his dreams lately.

"Tch-..."

Whatever Shizuo was going to say was cut off as the blond finally noticed a mark that the hoodie could not cover. It was a bruise, freshly made judging from the color, and not the sort left upon a person's body by a fist.

"Still being a slut as always I see."

Izaya's eyes widen briefly as his heart stopped. It had been some time since his first 'date' with Delic. However, ever since then he had been more willing to meet with the blond host and even if they had never kissed still, Izaya could no longer refute Shizuo's words considering what he was currently going to meet Delic for. Just the thought caused Shizuo's words to stab Izaya deeper than the blond knew.

However, the flinch Izaya gave at the harsh words was unnoticed by Shizuo due to the way the raven's free hand flew up to cover the mark in shame. As his anger crescendoed once more at the realization that even now, when they had long been broken up, Izaya thought he could hide the truth caused Shizuo's fist clenched. "Can't even fucking lie anymore when the truth's right there, huh?!"

Taking advantage of Izaya's lack of words Shizuo swung his hand down to try and punch the louse right in his obscured face. However, Izaya seemed to have recollected his senses then as the male ducked down, causing Shizuo's fist to crash through the wall.

A bitter smile crept onto Izaya's face then, the mask raised back up. The sight of it set Shizuo's blood boiling as the raven straightened. "My, me being a slut makes you that angry, Shizu-chan? What's this... think you can still rekindle old flames?"

Cussing under his breath, Shizuo pulled his hand back out of the wall. "Mistakes should never be fucking repeated." Shaking his hand, Shizuo moved as if to grab at Izaya's hood only for the flickblade to block him. "Just get the fuck out of Ikebukuro."

At those words Izaya's grin twisted into a frown briefly before he spread his arms wide to give the blond a loose shrug. "You know, I was just about to leave until you decided to stop me."

Shizuo's lips thinned, his eyes flashing in annoyance at the innocent facade Izaya was putting out. "Shouldn't have come back here in the first place, flea!" The breath from Izaya's sigh brushed across Shizuo's skin as the male dropped his arms.

"Shizu-chan, I have work to do and if it involves meeting people in places that you think you own, so be it." At those words Shizuo's hand almost automatically grabbed at Izaya's hoodie, yanking the male forward, while the other grabbed at Izaya's wrist to stop his flickblade from doing any damage. "Work?" The blond scoffed. "You mean you were ruining people's lives!" Without warning, the blond whirled around and threw Izaya towards the opposite alley wall. The raven crashed hard into it, the male wincing before the feeling of Shizuo's hand wrapping around his neck next alerted him to the blond's plan. Izaya barely managed to grab at it, trying to tug Shizuo's harsh grip loose even as the blond began to slowly lift him into the air to hold him pinned against the wall.

"Shizu... chan... I think you're blaming the wrong guy..."

Shizuo's answer was a simple tightening of his fingers until Izaya began to choke for air.

"Shut it, louse."

The anger Shizuo felt was natural. It was the anger of a man who both possessed over the top emotions and a heart wounded from betrayal. From the people Izaya slept around with to the many times the louse had tried to get him arrested Shizuo knew his anger was justified.

Yet...as Shizuo's fingers tightened, the brushing of his finger against the mark on Izaya's neck startled Shizuo. Even as the anger lingered memories flooded his mind, reminding him of things he'd rather forget.

Things like how hard Izaya had worked to hide the marks from him in high school.

How hard he had tried to make it seem as if Shizuo was being jealous over nothing.

And how little Izaya seemed to care both then and now when his skin was tarnished by someone other than Shizuo.

"Shizu... chan... can't... breathe…"

Izaya clawed at his hand, the male's skin going pale as oxygen escaped him. It was more than obvious that Shizuo's anger left him intent on finally finishing this fight. Yet even as he tried to do so, his hand hesitated. Despite his best intentions, his mind remained fixated upon the marking of Izaya's neck, the sight of it somehow transforming his anger over Izaya's presence into an anger aimed more towards the fact that the flea had been  _marked_  by another person other than Shizuo even after all this time. He had known that, Izaya being Izaya, the informant was probably sleeping around since they've broken up but seeing such an indisputable evidence plainly in view forced Shizuo to confirm his fears.

Feeling his lip curl, Shizuo shifted his hand so that he could see the mark better. It was small, but it was dark in a way that made it clear that someone had put forth a lot of effort to make sure it would linger on Izaya's skin for a long time. Eyes narrowing, Shizuo leaned forward towards Izaya despite the smaller male's struggles. Without even thinking about it, the blond pressed his ex-lover hard into the brick to keep Izaya from fighting as Shizuo brought his mouth down to suddenly bite  _hard_  into the marked up skin. The sudden bite caused Izaya to give a hard gasp, his head hitting hard into the brick in shock as Shizuo continued biting until the metallic taste of blood begin to drip onto his tongue. Then and only then did the blond pull back to give a harsh suck against the skin there so that a newer, darker bruise covered the previous one.

"Who was it this time?"

Shizuo pulled back completely, tongue licking crudely at the blood lingering upon his lips as he glared at Izaya.

"Or did you already forget their name?"

As he spoke Shizuo's hand loosened around Izaya's neck, his hold just firm enough to keep a now flushed Izaya off of his feet without choking him anymore.

"Hmm~ Who knows?"

It was only once he caught his breath did Izaya speak again but the sound of it only flared up Shizuo's anger. Carelessly he moved his thumb down to dig the finger into the open wound on his neck now, making sure it hurt as he spoke. "So they fucked you too hard for you to remember."

Despite the obvious pain, a harsh laugh escaped Izaya, his hands tightening their hold on Shizuo's but no longer struggling to get free as he watched Shizuo through thinly slitted eyes. "Fucked me? Ah~ So now you're thinking…-!" Izaya's words cut off as Shizuo dug his finger in again, the male shuddering from the pain of it while Shizuo growled under his breath.

"Not ' _thinking'_."

Leaning forward, Shizuo lowered Izaya some more so that their faces were even.

"I _know._ "

Izaya's smile remained firm, the sight of it still making Shizuo's nerves fray as their eyes met. "Jealous, Shizu-chan? Thought you said we were…." Izaya couldn't seem to get the final word out, unable to say the word 'over' to confirm the status of their relationship despite everything that has happened but the reason as to why didn't seem to concern Shizuo. Instead, the fact that Izaya seemed to think he was that concerned with the flea's love life was reason enough for him to tighten his hold around Izaya's neck once more.

"Like  _hell_  I would ever be jealous over you." The word 'again' lingered in the air between them as Izaya's body began to stiffen and his legs tried to kick out at the insurmountable monster. His neck felt as though it was going to be crushed under Shizuo's strength, air escaping him as his smile finally fell into an expression of uncertainty. Nails digging into Shizuo's hand, Izaya managed to mouth the words ' _Shizu….chan…._ ' as a final plea while his face began to turn blue. Hand flexing, Shizuo hesitated before finally letting go, causing Izaya to crumple to the ground with several hard coughs.

Izaya...had had his chance with Shizuo.

And the raven had fucked it up.

After all that Shizuo had done. After all that he had  _tried_  to do to make sure Izaya had been treated right back in high school.

Izaya had still felt it was okay for him to go and sleep around.

"You have three seconds to get out of Ikebukuro before I kill you"

Izaya coughed and wheezed below him, the male still struggling to catch his breath as Shizuo stared coldly down at him through violet-hued sunglasses.

Shizuo had…. thought he had been doing better. With Tom's guidance and having Vorona around to fight along side him Shizuo had been managing to leash in most of his temper problems.

Today had been the first time in a long time that Shizuo had broken some guy's back by throwing him into a wall.

And that was only because it had stunk today.

Because a certain flea felt the need to continue plaguing his city.

"Three…"

Shizuo really hated violence. But most of all he hated that violence was necessary for his very existence.

"Two…."

Yet he had always known that despite this hatred for it, since he had been a child that violence had always been within him. That he was violence in and of itself.

And it was for this reason that Shizuo had always hated himself.

"One."

He had just also always hoped to find someone who could accept this violence and maybe even love him for it.

Entrusting Izaya with that duty had been a mistake. A mistake he feared to make again.

As Izaya staggered to stand up, Shizuo's hand lurched forward to try and grab the male by his black shirt once more. "Time is up, bastard." However, perhaps the flea had sensed the hatred creeping up behind him as instead the raven wore a serious expression as he used the last of his energy to dodge Shizuo's incoming hand. Pivoting on his heel, he turned to face Shizuo with an upraised blade. Within moments the blade was pressed tight against Shizuo's neck as a warning since both knew the blade could never cut deep enough to damage the fortissimo.

"Shizu-chan. Look. Just... let me off."

Izaya's guard was lowered as he spoke, an appeal echoing within his voice as dark eyes met Shizuo's angered brown ones. Unfortunately, Shizuo's echoing growl implied the lack of sympathy the blond felt. "This isn't a warning, flea. This will be the last time you set foot into Ikebukuro."

This time, to the shock of them both, the punch connected.

The expression on Izaya's face caught Shizuo off guard but by then it was too late. Izaya's body flew down the alley to crash hard into the dead end before the male crumpled on the ground there and didn't move again. Shizuo remained frozen where he stood, his eyes obscured by the sunglasses there for a few seconds before he was finally straightening back up.

"Oi."

Shizuo's hand moved to grip the back of his neck, his head tilting to the side so that his bones cracked as he began to walk towards Izaya.

"Get up."

The gravel crunched beneath his feet, the sound disturbing as Shizuo slowly made his way down the alley.

"Fucking flea,  _get up_."

Shizuo didn't like hitting people while they were already down and Izaya was no exception. Reaching out, the blond grabbed the limp informant by the collar and swiftly lifted him back into the air. However, Izaya still didn't respond as his head hung back and his body moved easily beneath the blond's hold. Face still expressionless, Shizuo tried shaking him a couple of times before his teeth began to grind in anger at Izaya's unconscious refusal to listen.

"WAKE UP!"

Shizuo's other hand reached out to grab Izaya as well, the blond pulling his body close as confusion began to saturate the male's thoughts.

What was this?

Izaya couldn't be hurt.

Shizuo could never hurt the bastard. It was one of the highlights of their fucked up relationship now.

The louse always escaped unscathed and it was always Shizuo who was left to bear the markings of their scrapes.

"Wake up, you hear me?! Izaya!"

But Izaya didn't answer.

A cold feeling washed over Shizuo's body. Fingers going numb he dropped Izaya before stumbling towards the wall. The blood drained from Shizuo's face as the realization of what he had done began to slowly catch up with him.

The one person...he had trusted would never fall to his strength.

The one person he had thought he could never hurt…

A sickening fear began to sink into Shizuo's guts as he fell against the wall, his legs going weak as he slid down it until he was sitting. His heart pounded in his ears, the sound drowning out almost everything save for the sound of a low groan finally escaping Izaya's lips. A moment later and the raven finally began to stir much to Shizuo's relief.

"Why didn't you dodge, flea?"

Izaya moved his hands under him, his strength still obviously frail as he tried to push himself up with a groan.

"S-Shizu-chan... you really can't be reasoned with, can you."

Shizuo scowled at that but the anger he had been experiencing earlier was no longer there as he stared at the raven who was now gripping his head.

"You could have killed me you know... does it really bother you that someone actually loves me enough to mark me?"

That word….

Before Shizuo realized it he was on his feet again. Swiftly he grabbed at Izaya's shirt to pull him closer once more, causing the lower part of his stomach to become bare as the shirt crumpled under his grip. "As if anyone could ever love a bastard like you?" But it was then that Shizuo saw it.

Saw  _them._

The kissmarks.

On Izaya's lower stomach as well.

The blond stilled, his breathing shallow as he stared down at the markings. Izaya was saying something, but the blond couldn't actually hear him as everything but the markings became background noise. It took him a few seconds to actually be able to move, but even once he began to return to his surroundings the blond remained fixated on the markings. Reaching up, the blond bunched the shirt up before suddenly ripping at it so that the fabric tore open enough to reveal the rest of them.

"The hell?!" Shocked, Izaya stepped back only to find a wall blocking his escape. Hastily he grabbed at the scraps of fabric, trying to keep himself covered only to finally realize what it was that had made Shizuo so mad.

Delic's marks.

* * *

"Marks?"

Izaya looked at Delic incredulously as the host took his coat and hung it. It had only been a couple of weeks since their rather bizarre date, but perhaps out of some strange gratefulness for what Delic had tried to do for him Izaya didn't feel like avoiding the blond like he once had. Instead, upon finding an opportunity to employ Delic's services as a source of information, rather than prolonging the inevitable, Izaya found himself almost willingly appearing once again at the 'rose garden' of the number one host of Tokyo .

"Yes. Marks. I wish to mark your body as much as I want this time in exchange." The last time Delic had the chance to mark him felt really good and it wasn't as if he would ever be able to do that with his female clients. Already the host was sizing up the informant with eyes as if he was looking at a delicious forbidden fruit. Izaya sighed.

"Fine, but nowhere where it's visible."

"Aww, that's no fun, informant-san…" Delic chuckled as he took Izaya's nervous hand and kissed the underside of his wrist. "The mark is left as a proclamation to the world that you belong to someone, you know."

"I don't belong to you." Izaya pointed out bluntly. He knew exactly what marks meant. Because Shizuo had always left them on his body back then. Now his body was completely healed but…

...his heart still hadn't.

"Fair enough. No marks where it's visible." Delic smiled and held his hand up as if he was taking an oath. Izaya just rolled his eyes.

"...Deal. But how do I know when you're done?" Izaya asked a bit confused as he was led to the couch. Their previous deals ended when Delic 'came', or had orgasm which was a visible indication that their session had ended. But Izaya just couldn't see how… or what could be a signal for the ending of this session.

The host chuckled. "Oh you'll know."

Hand grabbing Izaya's, the blond lifted his informant's arm up so as to twirl him around until the raven fell down onto the plush leather cushion. Izaya let out a small huff at the gesture, eyes rolling slightly before he turned his body so that he could lay down with his feet stretching out onto Delic's lap when the blond joined him. Izaya didn't exactly know what Delic had planned but he figured he would be safer with some distance between them like this. The host didn't seem to mind, however, as he reached down to pick up one of Izaya's legs, his fuchsia eyes practically sparkling with excitement as he pulled off Izaya's shoes and socks so that he could place a chaste kiss onto the male's ankle,

"You know, it's harder to mark skin where the bones are more prominent." Delic sounded bemused as his fingers slipped up the cuff of Izaya's pants leg, making the straight leg fabric be pushed up towards Izaya's knee so that his mouth could find a more tender spot on Izaya's calf. He was gentle, at first, licking and sucking in a way that caused Izaya's skin to tingle more from a ticklish sensation than any pleasure. The host was clearly taking his time, the man acting like a connoisseur for Izaya's flesh more than anything else before finally he began to concentrate harder. The sudden aggressive sucking caused Izaya's leg to reflexively tighten up, the raven caught from pulling it away due to the grip the blond held still upon his ankle. Too ashamed to look down at him, Izaya leaned his head back so that it was against the couch, his toes curling as the feeling of the blood vessels breaking under his skin became more and more apparent until finally Delic pulled his mouth away with a lewd sucking noise. Lifting one hand, Izaya placed his arm over his arms as he felt Delic's hands wander up to touch the new bruise, his hands gentle and careful before they slid up higher to catch the button of Izaya's jeans.

Shocked, Izaya's hand flew off of his eyes to grab at the back of the couch. Lifting his head up, the raven looked down just in time to see that roguish smile upon Delic's lips before his hips were being lifted up and his pants abruptly pulled down and off. Making a noise of discontent in the back of his throat, Izaya lifted his upper body as if to try and cover himself only for Delic's gaze to catch his eyes.

"It won't be visible."

The host reminded Izaya, his voice playful as one of Izaya's legs were lifted over Delic's shoulder so that the blond could lean inwards towards the male's thighs. Anxiously, Izaya tried to squeeze them closed, his expression slightly aghast as Delic's fingers ghosted up the sides. "A deal is a deal, informant-san." Delic's eyes were bemused, the sight causing Izaya's stomach to tighten in anticipation as the blond hovered in closer to kiss and suck along Izaya's inner thighs. Eyelids hooding, Delic moved his hands to force Izaya's thighs open wider for him as he began to move along the pale skin with a determination to mark the male as much as he could.

"...! …!" Izaya swallowed his moan, tossing and turning his head until he finally just decided to bury himself against the pillow in the hopes that would help. It was just a kiss. He couldn't lose to something so simple as a kiss… no matter how good it felt or how much his body ached for it.

He wouldn't lose. He would keep himself from moaning for Delic as in his heart Izaya still believed that his moans should be for Shizuo's ears only, just like his kisses. Despite everything that has been happening between him and Delic, and despite how his heart shattered just a week ago, he still just wanted to save his moans for that one blond he wish he hated more than he loved. But the sucking made his body burn and his stomach flop as his flesh remembered the way Shizuo used to mark him.

The only difference now, was that whereas Shizuo was rough and took what he wanted of Izaya's body, right now Delic was gentle, careful. The stark difference was enough to enable Izaya to keep it together.

As the 5th bruise formed beneath his lips, Delic began to frown. He could feel the way Izaya stiffened, sense the way he struggled to keep himself from enjoying it. Every caught sound, every hitched breath, only increased the host's frustrations. Lifting his head, the blond abandoned Izaya's thighs to move to his stomach noise. As patience began to thin Delic began to work harder - his gentleness still apparent but not so much as bruises began to litter the smaller male's body. Every time the blond found a sensitive spot, Delic began to eagerly attack it. He was merciless in his attacks, causing Izaya to writhe and gasp above him but still the male refused to moan. Finally, Delic's frustrations got the better of him and with hardly a warning he was shoving Izaya's shirt up high to lick teasingly around a perked up nipple. The sensation of his wet tongue caused Izaya to still save for a shuddering, deep inhale through the raven's nose before Delic was flicking his tongue teasingly against the flushed nub.

"Are you sensitive here, Izaya-san?"

The way Delic whispered the words was like a husky, timbre. It caused Izaya's skin to crawl with excitement for the pleasure his tone promised if only the informant would let him. Mind growing a little blank, Izaya clutched the pillow he was hiding his face in harder, unable and unwilling to speak out of fear of what noise would actually come out unwillingly instead. However, rather than deter Delic this challenge only seemed to urge him on. Breathing out heatedly against the nipple, the host brought his other hand up to tease the ignored one by dragging his nail along the areola gently as he spoke.

"You like this, don't you Informant-san? This tension, the excitement of the wait? You haven't even noticed the way your legs have wrapped around my waist."

Delic chuckled at the way Izaya jolted as though he truly did only just realize that now but did not possess the power to separate himself.

"I'll make the wait worth it, beautiful."

With that Delic was wrapping his lips around Izaya's nipple and suckling hard. Izaya's body lurched, his chest bowing towards Delic as a strangled sound from his resisted moan escaped Izaya's lips. But, rather than getting distracted by the way Izaya's legs tightened around him Delic poured all of his concentration into the task at hand. With a lascivious attention he sucked, teased, licked, and sometimes even nipped at the two nipples, adoring the way Izaya's body twisted and writhed beneath him as bewildering pleasure he had not experienced in years usurped his mind. It was all Izaya could do to fight the moans back, his mind blanketing in nothing save the pleasure of his sensitive nipples being toyed with for so long. His cock grew hard, tenting in his boxer briefs and rubbing against Delic's hard stomach as the blond's free hand moved around to gently squeeze Izaya's bottom. He was taking advantage of the moment, he knew, but far be it from Delic to pass up this opportunity.

The only thing that could ruin it was the fact that still-

Almost stubbornly-

Not one moan escaped Izaya's mouth.

Feeling a bitter type of anger settle into his stomach, the blond did not let up. His entire focus was centered on Izaya's nipples until both were swollen and bruised. Then and only then did the blond finally let up as he moved next to Izaya's neck. He knew he was cutting it close now, knew Izaya would probably get mad, but still he couldn't resist as he made one final mark right where he was sure someone would be able to see it.


	9. Chapter 9

* * *

" _Every time he left, I shattered apart_." ― Rachel Higginson

* * *

"You-..."

Shizuo seemed to lack the eloquence to convey what it was he was thinking or feeling as he stared down at the markings covering Izaya's entire upper body. Instead all he seemed to possess was action as he grabbed at Izaya's hands to pin them over his head in an effort to keep the flea from hiding the markings. It began with the kiss mark on his neck and moved down like a trail. The next one was near his collarbone then another right under it leading to two bites around the areolas, the skin there was normally pink but having turned into a darker red from bruising. Whoever they were, they had lavished their attention around Izaya's obvious erogenous zones that even Shizuo could still remember. The lewd trail then continued lower and lower, a few marks lingering around Izaya's navel before several more were flowered along his hip bone. The last one was teasingly half hidden below Izaya's pants, the love trail obviously continuing down to his crotch. It took all of Shizuo's effort to not rip the pants off to see where the rest of the trail led. Of course, Shizuo had no idea how angry Izaya had gotten when Delic had marked him near his neckline or how Izaya stormed out furiously. Or that the marks actually started from bottom up but none of that mattered. Today, Delic had said he would make it up to Izaya and the informant had reluctantly agreed to meet the host.

"Who could love you?" Shizuo couldn't help but blurt out incredulously.

Izaya glared up at Shizuo, the male obviously finding offense with that question. It wasn't because Izaya was angry that Shizuo thought no one could love him, but rather it also meant that perhaps Shizuo had never loved him in the past. And that hurt deeper than anything else. The bitterness started to seep further into the informant's already blackened, sick heart.

However, it wasn't just Izaya whose heart was being tainted black. A low buzzing began to fill Shizuo's ears, the sound blocking out all logical and coherent thought as he stared at the bruises.

Someone else's bruises.

But why?

Why should he care?

He shouldn't.

He shouldn't.

He...

After all this time…..

"Everyone loves me, Shizu-chan. As they should."

Izaya's face was tinged pink, the male ashamed at being exposed in such a manner. Still he struggled to maintain his pride. He couldn't and he  _wouldn't_  let Shizuo hurt him like this. He glared daggers at Shizuo. He would hurt Shizuo first whether he meant what he actually said or not.

"The real question is, how could someone love a monster like you?" Izaya spit out his words as he turned his anger right back at him, fully knowing how much that would hurt Shizuo.

And as Izaya had wanted, the words pierced Shizuo's heart like an arrow as his hand tightened. Shizuo's heart started to thud as if someone was beating his chest. His lips parted involuntarily as he labored with each breath.

How...?

What kind of question was that?

After what had happened between them?

Izaya knew!

He knew!

And yet Izaya must have forgotten.

Forgotten in favor of spreading himself around like a whore to get other people's love.

So maybe it was up to Shizuo to remind him.

To make him remember what it was like to love a monster.

"The fuck would I know….." Shizuo murmured before his lips crashed against Izaya's, the exchange almost like another attack rather than a kiss from the sheer force of it. However, it caught Izaya off guard enough to keep him from fighting back as the male froze under him. Growling, Shizuo pushed harder against the male, his knee sliding between Izaya's legs to help keep him pinned there as the blond bit down onto Izaya's bottom lip.

"Nnngh…." Izaya shuddered at the pain of the bite and the way the knee rubbed against his groin, demanding him to feel aroused. The pain was too much, and Izaya had enough of the way Shizuo kept forcing himself into his heart. The informant didn't want it anymore, his heart was still too damaged from the last time he broke down. His heart was nowhere near its full recovery. Having Shizuo pry him open again and force him to confront his emotions was something the proud informant just wasn't prepared to face right now, so Izaya tried to push the blond debt collector away.

Shizuo pulled his head away at Izaya's pushing, however he did not relent the knee between Izaya's legs. His knee eased higher, pressing against Izaya's groin almost teasingly at first. Shizuo abruptly began to rub and rock roughly against Izaya's cock all the while preventing the male from disentangling himself from the blond with brute force.

"Aaaah…!" Izaya involuntarily cried out as sure enough, that rub alone was enough to arouse him.

' _Fuck…_ ' The informant hissed, feeling his body heat up. His nipples hardened against the cool breeze as his shirt was ripped away previously. After all these years that Shizuo didn't even bother to even care to give a fuck, …why now?!

"S-Shizu…! Let me go!" Izaya struggled, trying to free himself even if he knew that Shizuo was way stronger.

Shizuo could feel his own cock twitch at the sound of Izaya's initial moan. He could sense something stirring and awakening deep inside him, his thirst for the raven's body wouldn't be quenched so easily. It was like a tidal wave as everything came back crashing. The way Izaya had moaned for him, the way Izaya had cried his name in ecstasy and begged for more and even the way his ass felt, wrapping around his cock and sucking him sweetly….Shizuo's mouth parted slightly and he licked his lips.

"Want to know…?" Shizuo breathed softly, the ex-bartender moving his body to settle on top of Izaya's hardening flesh. His hips rocked hard and slammed against the informant before a brutal rhythmic thrust was taken up with each harsh rocking of his hips. He heard Izaya yelp and whimper as their hips met and he knew that the fucking flea remembered how good it had felt back then too. Shizuo leaned his face close again, his lips lightly brushed against Izaya's ear to whisper, "-what it's like to love a  _monster,_  flea?"

"... _Haaaaa…..Nnnnghh._.." Izaya shivered as he could practically feel his ears flame from Shizuo's dirty talk. He tried to smirk back, trying to pretend his words did not affect him as much as it did. By doing so, he hoped he could mask how much his heart wanted to run back to this blond's arms again.

"Ahh…but bestiality is illegal you know," Izaya managed a cocky answer despite his flushed cheeks and parted lips that begged for more kisses.

For a second, Shizuo considered stuffing the scraps of Izaya's shirt into that arrogant mouth.

But he resisted.

Barely.

"Since when has illegality stopped you?"

Shizuo's hips shifted, thrusting harshly and directly against Izaya's hardening cock.

"Nnnnghh…! Aah!"

Izaya shuddered again as he was crushed back against the wall forcefully. His back hurt, though his cock hardened even more from just that thrust. ' _This damn lewd body…_ ' Izaya cursed at himself. Obviously, his body wanted this by the way it ached from the lack of sexual attention it was not receiving.

With one hand still keeping Izaya pinned against the wall, Shizuo moved his head down to force his lips back onto the other male's. It was almost as though he was attempting to elicit more responses out of the raven. Searching for something to tell him that Izaya wanted this just as much as Shizuo was beginning to.

Shizuo's hips continued moving, grinding against Izaya's to seek some kind of relief. His cock grew hard as the heat began to spiral around his head. If he was thinking straight, Shizuo would have realized that there was no reason for this. He was over Izaya. Or so he should have been. But seeing someone else's marks on the flea's skin had only served to dredge up and rekindle the possessive jealousy that had plagued Shizuo all throughout his teen years.

"Mmmngh…" Izaya moaned as Shizuo began grinding harder and harder against him. His cock cried in pain yet also screamed for more as it was forcefully hardened with each thrust. Despite his arousal, Izaya refused to open his mouth, unwilling to provide Shizuo entry. Seeing this refusal, Shizuo bit down on Izaya's lip in anger. However, when the bite failed to work, Shizuo's anger turned to fury. How dare the louse refuse him!

"Fuckin' flea." And with a growl, Shizuo's free hand reached down to pinch a hard nipple, still trying to make Izaya's mouth open.

"Aaaahhh!" The pain was intolerable as Izaya let out a choked cry, his cock also following his suit. However, Izaya's pain was lost on Shizuo. Instead he seized his chance to plunge his tongue into informant's sweet mouth in order to claim Izaya as his. Shizuo's hand slid down between them as he slowed his thrusting, gripping Izaya's cock through his pants. Feeling the arousal dwindle, Shizuo growled slightly.

Not even Izaya could get a hard-on for him anymore?

No.

Shizuo realized now that Izaya's cock had shrunk from the pain.

He didn't know before.

Now that he touched it, he knew.

The very thought of Orihara Izaya succumbing to him, the one who had always been able to handle Shizuo's strength, only served to piss him off even more. Back then, Izaya loved the pain.

Back then, Izaya would beg him to go harder. Begging Shizuo to break his ass.

He was the one person who had always stood on even footing with him.

Now that Izaya was susceptible to his strength like everyone else was unacceptable to Shizuo.

"Shizu….!" Izaya tried to protest only to have his mouth shut shut with Shizuo's kiss devouring him and his tongue ravished. He tried to fight back, pushing weakly against the thrusts even as Shizuo grabbed and pumped him through his pants. Though it was like fighting against an unmoving wall, Shizuo remained unrelenting and unmerciful. Izaya's nipples grew hard and taunt again, one wanting the attention while the other was swollen from too much of it. Izaya tried to push away the forceful assailant in his mouth, wanting to bite him but knowing that would only anger this monster further. The Informant didn't want to passively allow Shizuo in, his tongue fighting back aggressively in an attempt to push the agile muscle away. Despite Izaya's continued fighting, Shizuo continued to assault him, demanding him to receive and accept him again.

' _Shizu…_.' Izaya shivered as he could feel Shizuo desperately kiss him. He could feel how much Shizuo wanted him back, or so he thought. And just as desperately, Izaya wanted to just give in and run back to this monster. Even though he knew that it would be yet another grave mistake, Izaya's broken heart continued to beat faster and faster. Squeezing tightly, so painfully that it took his breath away how much he wanted to just let it go and tell Shizuo that he still loved him and he would do anything to make things right. Little by little, Izaya's tongue reluctantly started to fight less and less, allowing Shizuo to take over and have his way with him.

And to Shizuo, the taste of Izaya was familiar and yet, foreign. Like that of a dream that had been forgotten as Shizuo's tongue darted around Izaya's mouth.

It tasted of a better time when Shizuo had been able to trust himself more.

Before all the situations in his life caused Shizuo's already horrible temper to make everything spiral out of control.

The blond slowed his tongue down a little, wanting to remember this taste, those feelings of security. More gently than before, he rubbed his tongue across the roof of Izaya's mouth before twining his tongue with the other male's muscle, all the while his hand continued to bring Izaya's cock back to it's full hardness.

By now Izaya had stopped struggling as Shizuo's kiss became less demanding. It surprised him when the tongue stopped plundering and taking everything hostage and had started to caress him almost gently like a kitten. Now the raven moaned, breathing in small stutters, closing his eyes and lightly sucking on Shizuo's tongue back, again his heart wanting to just reconnect once more. He could feel his cock finally harden with each of Shizuo's strokes and it…it felt good.

To Izaya's further surprise, Shizuo slowly dragged his tongue out, the saliva between their lips connecting them from the lengthy duration of their kiss, and placed his forehead on top of Izaya's. He began to pant harshly, face flushed red with desire as his hand continued to palm Izaya' fully hard cock, making the informant squirt precum. Shizuo briefly gazed into Izaya's stunned eyes, the painful memories kept surfacing like a bad movie. Still, Shizuo tilted his head again, nose brushing against Izaya's as he recaptured the male's lips and began to suck at his hurt bottom lip, the one he bit earlier. And without realizing it himself, Shizuo's grip on his hands loosened.

Izaya could have retorted right then as Shizuo finally let him breath. But he didn't, not yet….he wanted to be in this dream just a bit longer until he had to wake up. When Shizuo started to suck on his bleeding lower lip, his heart ached once more as if he was being stabbed by a million needles from the sweet gentleness the blond displayed.

Why now? Izaya wanted to ask as he could feel his tears well up at the corners of his eyes. Why was Shizuo  _now_  displaying to him how gentle he could be and how sweet he could taste? After they had broken up and after Izaya have decided that he could never have him back, why did this damn monster  _now_  show him the side that Izaya had dreamed of seeing and had always wished he could have for himself.

He wanted him back. Even if he knew it was a futile wish, even if he knew more than anyone that even if they got back together, they would only hurt each other once more…. Izaya couldn't help but want Shizuo back as his and his only.

"...Shizuo..." Izaya moaned that name softly with longing and desire. The name he was so scared he would breath while Delic had marked him or during all of their other sensual sessions. The name that carried all of Izaya's unrequited love and unattained affection. The name he loathed to speak and yet he always seemed to speak when in throes of passion… He missed this. He missed this...and yet…

He knew it was something he could never have.

"Heh...is this the best you can do, little monster-chan?"

Izaya's heart was too tainted black and broken. The cocky smirk was back as his mask came up once more. Perhaps if they had met few months earlier, or even weeks...before Izaya experienced his heart shattering into so many pieces that he couldn't heal properly; this would have been fine. But he had refused to experience that again. He didn't want to feel how vulnerable and helpless he had felt when he saw him with Vorona and the thought of the blond leaving him completely and forever. That still had not changed. Shizuo's sweet kisses did not mean he was trying to come back to Izaya, and the raven's logical side won this time after how many times his heart had failed him. This time, Izaya refused to be the one abandoned and in pain.

When he was younger, Shizuo had been better at reading Izaya. He had known when the male was trying to put up a barrier, a mask that hid his true emotions behind that insecure and fragile ego.

But now that he had lost that skill, the mere thought that their feelings were no longer mutual caused Shizuo's blood to boil.

The hand gripping Izaya's hands suddenly tightened once more. Shizuo ignored the little raven flinch and yelp in pain as his anger started to take control. If the fucking flea wanted a monster, he will have a monster.

But first, those marks had to go.

"Haaaahhh!" Izaya cried out as his eyes widened in pain when Shizuo suddenly bit down on his neck harshly, remarking that one that had caused it all. Licking at the wound to make sure Izaya could feel the sting, Shizuo then travelled to the one lower, right above his collarbone.

"S-Shizu…! Nnngh… wait! S-sto… _Haaahh!_!" Izaya yelped again as Shizuo bit him once more, practically sinking his teeth into him like a carnivore eating his prey. But he didn't rip him apart, just enough to leave a mark over the one Izaya's 'lover' had left.

"No! Wait..!" Izaya looked down practically frightened when Shizuo's glare was eyeing his two nipples. T-this is going to hurt!

Yet, when Izaya closed his eyes and tensed up in preparation, Shizuo happened to look up at the informant. Was he frightened? The sight caused a confused bitterness to settle deep inside the blond.

Who had frightened him?

Was it him?

Was he really becoming a true monster? Just like Izaya had always claimed him to be?

Gritting his teeth, Shizuo swallowed back his anger just a bit. It was hard. It was even harder than the day he had pulled back his punch when he had been attacked at the park by all those strangers stabbed by Saika. The rage inside ate up at him, the sickening feeling centered upon the jealousy Shizuo felt over the fact that Izaya had let someone else get close to him.

But for  _his_  sake-,

For Izaya's sake, to remind him of what he had loved about Shizuo, the blond forced the rage into a quieter burn rather than a raging flame as his grip loosened to not to crush Izaya's petite little wrists. He licked the perky nub and felt Izaya's body shiver under his tongue.

Izaya peeked open his eyes, confused when the pain didn't rain down on him, but he didn't relax just yet. Shizuo was too unpredictable and he couldn't afford not to be guarded. Still, Izaya couldn't understand the blond who started to lick his nipples more gently.

Shizuo closed his eyes so he couldn't see the baleful kiss-mark that laughed back at him and threatened to increase the severity of his rage once more. Instead he tried to concentrate on the taste, the way Izaya's nipples hardened and flexed under his tongue. He remembered how much he used to enjoy playing with them… and how much Izaya used to moan hard as he wanted more. Those times were long gone now but it was nice that some things didn't change…. especially how Izaya's nipples always reacted the same way to him.

The blond gave it a good suck, earning a small moan from the raven that he had once thought he loved, then he lightly bit the nipple and tugged. He heard a small yelp, not quite one of pain but one more of pleasure that made the debt collector smile as he let the nub go to lick it again. He could feel Izaya's chest rise and fall, how the raven was gritting his teeth in an attempt to hold back.

"You still like having your nipples sucked, flea." Shizuo noted, his eyes softening just a bit before he went back to the other neglected one to leave a mark. He knew exactly how sensitive Izaya was there and he didn't feel like hurting them, only sucking enough to leave his own marks on that already swollen areola.

"Haah! Haa-aahh! Hnnngh…!" Izaya didn't have much time to retort as Shizuo continued to nip him and remark those trails, his tongue almost apologetically licking each time. He wasn't quite as practiced as Delic had been, but there was something more enjoyable in the rough way Shizuo's mouth handled his body. It was familiar. It caused white dots of pleasure to dance across his vision and before he knew it, Izaya's body was arching up for more. Shizuo brought the male's wrists down to Izaya's back, holding him there as if he was handcuffed while his teeth and tongue made sure to leave his own trails of kiss marks on top of that beautiful skin he once loved. Shizuo remembered that feeling he had once felt for this man, a stirring in his gut and groin each time he saw the pale teen accidentally show a glimpse of those kiss marks around his collar bones back in class. Whenever the shirt slipped a bit lower, or the ones around his hip bones when the shirt moved up, each time it happened, Shizuo felt strangely proud. And if the class wasn't in session, he would have taken Izaya down right then and there for another good fuck. If he couldn't hold it in, he sometimes dragged Izaya to the bathroom or the gym storage or even the rooftop. And Shizuo could still remember how each time Izaya would writhe under him while the blond sucked on that specific area of the hipbone he was sucking now, and how Izaya would look down into his eyes, his cheeks flushed pink as he shyly moaned Shizuo's name.

Izaya….was so much cuter back then.

And now this despicable man dared to let someone else mark one of Shizuo's favorite spots…. that little protruding hipbone that never failed to make the flea hard and beg. It drove him crazy knowing someone had found the secret area, almost as much as the thought of Izaya begging someone else did. But rather than letting his anger get ahold of him again; Shizuo poured his attentions there, lasciviously suckling and nipping as Izaya writhed and moaned lewdly above him with every break of the blood vessels hidden beneath his skin.

After marking that one particular soft spot, Shizuo's deft fingers gripped the back of Izaya's pants and ripped them off, the pieces scattering around them.

Now all the marks were visible...including the love bites around Izaya's pale beautiful thighs. The inner thighs near Izaya's crotch where Shizuo had once loved sucking because Izaya had always moaned and twisted, begging him, were littered with the most marks. Izaya had always gone crazy each time Shizuo had bit him there, growing especially hard or drooling as his eyes rolled up in ecstasy. The blond swallowed hard as he felt his hand burn to know that he had just squeezed him there with his own hands as if they were defiled. Shizuo gritted his teeth at the thought of Izaya moaning and begging for more in that exact beautiful manner to someone else.

"Do you remember yet, Izaya?"

Shizuo's words were murmured lowly, the sound barely reaching Izaya's ears as he felt the blond's lips trailing along his inner thigh. A fog was settling into the informant's mind, clouding all thought save how desperately he wanted Shizuo to take him once more. Lips parting, Izaya breathed out slowly, intent on saying something, anything - if only his attention wasn't stolen from the sensation of Shizuo's tongue trailing along the edge of his briefs. Whimpering in anticipation, Izaya's hands tensed up behind him from where Shizuo still held them trapped. A moment later,the first feeling of Shizuo's lips suckling the sensitive skin appeared far away from his crotch. It seemed Shizuo planned on working his way inward as he concentrated on hiding every insulting mark on the beautiful skin of his old high school love. It was a few minutes later until he finally began to move in closer, each bite and suck eliciting more pleased sounds from Izaya's parted and panting lips. His hands ached, he wanted to hold Shizuo, to grab at the blond's head and hold him there until there was no clear patch of skin left to mark. He wanted to remember how much he loved him, loved being marked by him and loved the pride he had felt in being able to show off Shizuo's possessiveness on his skin.

It was the same sentiment Shizuo had always shared.

The blond looked up at the whimpering raven, his eyes hazy in desire as he sucked gingerly right where the head of Izaya's cock could be felt through his briefs. Shizuo could taste the prcum seeping through and the taste was more familiar than anything else at the moment. It made Shizuo pause, struggling to sort through the emotions and memories plaguing him only for the sound of Izaya's languid moan to occupy his thoughts.

Without really considering the consequences of their exchange, the blond finally let go of Izaya's hands so that he could grab at the waistband of Izaya's briefs. Instantly and without thinking, Izaya moved to grab at Shizuo's blond hair but rather than push him away he held Shizuo there as the male began to kiss and lick at the raven's testes. Moaning, Izaya held on more for his own support than anything else as Shizuo sucked one of the balls into his mouth, licking and teasing the heavy sack before pulling away again to lick at Izaya's straining cock. Shizuo's name fell like a plea from Izaya's lips, his eyes unfocused as he stared down at the one who still held a frightful grip over his heart. Smiling at the sound of it, Shizuo pushed his body up, hands moving to hold onto the wall for support as he took the tip of Izaya's cock into his mouth.

"Haaa…! Ah-!"

Izaya couldn't help the way he thrust towards Shizuo. The motion made the blond move one hand to hold Izaya's hip, keeping him steady as slowly and unsteadily the blond tried to take the other male deeper into his mouth. It had been some odd years since Shizuo had ever done something of this nature, and the lack of practice was evident as he hesitated and explored to remember the ways Izaya liked it. But the raven didn't seem to mind as his voice grew louder and his hands tightened more firmly into Shizuo's hair. Drool began to slide down the corner of his mouth, pleasure crashing over him in steady pulses as Shizuo bobbed and sucked until he thought he was going to lose it.

"Haaah… aaaahnnn…! Sh-Shizu, I c-can't….! I'm going to…!"

Izaya's voice was weak from pleasure, his eyes rolling towards the back of his head as Shizuo sped up. Without much provocation he sucked harder, tenderly licking at the head of Izaya's cock with each pull before he was pushing back down to take the cock once more into his mouth.

Unable to take it, Izaya managed to stutter out only a few more warnings before finally crumbling. With a loud, staggered moan he was cumming hard. Caught off guard, Shizuo froze as the warm, thick release filled his mouth before he was finally pulling back with a hard cough. Unconcerned for appearances, the blond quickly dodged the rest of Izaya's release so that none would get on his shirt and vest before spitting the rest out into his hand. It stained his tanned skin, the feeling of the sticky liquid a cold reminder of what he was doing and with whom he was doing it with.

But as Shizuo looked up to the flushed and heady expression Izaya wore, he found his heart stopping. Unable to resist the blond pushed back up onto his feet, fingers still dripping with cum, to bring his and Izaya's lips together.

Still dazed, Izaya was unprepared when Shizuo locked their lips together as the cum covered tongue entered inside him. Izaya groaned, the heavy taste of his own cum assaulting his mouth. He remembered how much he hated it each time Shizuo did this when they were teens... and he also remembered how much Shizuo also loved giving his cum back to him in this manner. Izaya never understood exactly what Shizuo liked about it other but as he had done before, Izaya closed his eyes and obediently swallowed the leftover cum that Shizuo pushed into his mouth. He knew that Shizuo loved it whenever Izaya obediently drank it from his mouth, an offering he had always detested but perhaps that was why Shizuo also loved it, because he knew that Izaya must hate it but would do it anyway just to please him. It was several seconds before Izaya pulled away from the kiss and even then it was merely so he could hide his shamed flushed face in Shizuo's neck as he brought one leg up to wrap around the blond's waist.

No words were spoken but the gesture was clear as to it's meaning to the blond. Without any further coaxing, Shizuo brought his cum covered hand around Izaya's body to press one finger against the male's puckered entrance. Breathing out slowly, as if he knew there was no going back from here, Shizuo took a moment to gather himself before finally pushing one slickened finger inside.

The sensation caused Izaya to stiffen, the male having gone years without anyone touching him there. And Shizuo was far from elegant as he pumped the finger quickly in and out. He still knew only the basics of stretching and by now his patience was wearing thin as his own cock screamed from how long it had been left alone to listen to Izaya's cries. It was only a few minutes before a second finger pushed into Izaya as well, then even less time was given before a third was shoved in after. Each digit brought a new tinge of pain that Izaya refused to acknowledge as he held Shizuo against him. Before he could even comprehend when the raven had been lifted off of the ground so that both legs were wrapped around Shizuo for support, Izaya's back pressed into the brick wall to keep him from falling as he whimpered and groaned with every twitch of Shizuo's fingers inside of him.

"Shizu-chan….Shizu...chan... " Izaya panted as his ass twitched and sucked on those fingers, reminding him again and again how good it would feel to have his cock inside him now. He had been yearning for this moment for years. Even if he had given himself to Delic for all sorts of debauchery, he and Delic still did not have penetrative sex and it had been years since someone's cock had entered inside his ass, last time being Shizuo himself as a teenager. Izaya moaned and gasped, breathing into Shizuo's ears with need. He had saved himself for Shizuo for years. Just for him. Even if they had broken up, still Izaya just couldn't let anyone else have him like this. He didn't want anyone else but Shizuo.

Still, it felt so bitter and it hurt his heart that Shizuo kept thinking that he was a slut and had sex with other people already. Even after they had broken up, and even if Delic had continued to sexually touch him in every possible way for foreplay, still Izaya had saved his kisses, moans and penetrative sexual intercourses for Shizuo only. And yet this brute would never know because he would think Izaya was lying to him anyway. Izaya bitterly smiled as he laced his arms around Shizuo's neck and pulled him close.

It didn't matter now. Shizuo was here and so was he. Even if it was possibly their one last fuck, Izaya didn't care. He wanted this. His body and heart desperately ached for Shizuo.

Finally, with an impatient growl Shizuo yanked the fingers out of him.

Feeling dizzy from the sudden loss of pleasure, Izaya pulled his head back to try and see Shizuo, but the blond only pushed him back harder; refusing to meet Izaya's eyes as one hand hastily undid his pants to free his hard cock. The clicking sound as the buckles fell to the cement floor sent shivers up Izaya's spine with anticipation.

A few moments later and the thick head was pressed up against Izaya's warm and stretched entrance, The familiar sensation caused Izaya to dig his nails into Shizuo's shirt before he was abruptly thrust into. There was no finesse to Shizuo's movements, only raw desire as he forced his way into Izaya's barely prepared muscles. The feeling of being spread open made Izaya cry out, pain briefly clouding his vision as his body tightened up.

"Relax, Izaya." Shizuo pulled his hips back before snapping them forward again. The sheer intensity of the heat caused white to flutter around his mocha eyes and as he spoke again, his voice was husky with lust. "Unless you like it when it hurts."

"E-Easy for you to say…you never use lube or condoms…." That still hadn't changed, Izaya half chuckled to himself. He let out a stuttering moan, trying hard to relax. As he adjusted to the pain, Izaya could clearly feel the size of Shizuo's cock stretching his muscles and penetrating his deepest parts. Shizuo's….gotten bigger. He was thicker and longer, the head of the cock slightly brushing the underside of his stomach. But the cock was still the same old demanding brat, always throbbing with that insatiable heat that Izaya loved...and no matter how big and painful it was, Izaya couldn't help but love how he could feel Shizuo's heartbeat through that cock connecting them together.

He buried his face on to the side of Shizuo's neck so he couldn't see him crying. It wasn't due to the physical pain, he could take any physical abuse Shizuo threw at him. But the way this blond continued to crush his heart was something the informant still could not handle. Perhaps he really was a masochist, wanting to feel connected with Shizuo no matter how painful it was.

"Sounds to me, hnngh…" Shizuo grunted, forcing to pause before a flash of white and intense pleasure caused him to drive his cock in deeper. "Like you already know what it's like to do it with a monster."

"Aaah..!  _Haaahh_!" Izaya cried out when Shizuo thrusted again…and again, punctuating his words with every hard shove. Izaya's toes curled and with Shizuo's hands on his hips, it was easy to give in and let Shizuo do all the work. He could feel that cock stretch his muscles again and again, forcing Izaya to make way for him just like how his tongue had done earlier. Izaya chuckled softly. Some things never change...and he almost liked that about Shizuo.

"Harder….you know I like it harder, Shizu-chan..."

Izaya whispered just like the old days, his eyes flashing as his nails dug into Shizuo's back. The demand was met with a low grunt from Shizuo as he moved Izaya's body so that it was angled better for his thrusts. As time passed, slowly Izaya began to open up and the pain became forgotten in favor of the pleasure that the raven felt at being fucked by the one his heart still belonged to. Their voices mingled, moans and groans whirling in a cacophony of noise through the alley.

After how hard Izaya had worked to restrain himself with Delic, there was something freeing in being able to be as loud, as vulgar as he wanted to be with Shizuo again. To be able to moan loudly as the pleasure flooded his systems.

"Aaah…! Aaahnngh…! Aaannn..! Haaahnn...S-Shizu... chan…Shizu-chan!"

Slowly Izaya's voice became more and more sensual. The male bucked his hips, desperately trying to meet Shizuo's thrusts with his own.

"Aaahn! Aaahnn! Yes…! Aaahnn! There…! There…! I fucking love it there!"

Izaya's voice grew louder and rough, his moans lusty as his body bounced against the wall as that cock drove into his deepest parts, penetrating the very spot he had desperately wanted for years.

It felt good.

It felt better than he could have imagined.

The pain was still there, but god it was so good…to have Shizuo ram his cock into him again and make him his. To have Shizuo bite and mark him as his. To have Shizuo sweat, grunt and growl, to have this man fuck him as if the world would end tomorrow. Izaya's legs tightly wrapped around Shizuo's waist and his forehead was wet with sweat, his body rocking between the two hard places as pleasure was sucked dry from his body. He hadn't had someone to pry him apart and release all that pent up sexual frustration in years that only Shizuo had been able to do.

For his part, Shizuo's breath began to hitch when he felt Izaya relaxing into him. That sense of wanting Izaya to remember, to know once more what it was like to love a monster still enveloped all of his senses.

He wanted….

He needed Izaya to remember.

He couldn't be alone in this. In whatever  _this_  was.

"Aahn… aannngh...Shizu-chan…" Izaya's voice grew soft, his eyes looking up at Shizuo; half in pain and half in pleasure. His heart ached but his body burned with the pleasure of the other's body against his. Without thinking he moved one hand up, moving as if to brush it against Shizuo's face only for something to stop him. Perhaps it was his own fear of rejection, his own emotional turmoil at what awaited the two of them when this was over, but whatever it was Shizuo didn't yet comprehend as his own hand moved up to grab Izaya's. Eyes wide and curious, he moved to place Izaya's hand against his cheek only to freeze as well. Both their bodies stilled as they looked into one another's face before finally Shizuo let go of Izaya's hand.

"Kiss me...Shizu-chan."

The words caught both Shizuo and Izaya by surprise. It stirred something in the blond, an emotion as dark and bitter as the anger that still lingered in his gut. Eyes closing Shizuo let his glasses cover his eyes as hatred continued to churn inside of him.

Hatred for none other than himself.

"You don't...want that..."

Who could want the kiss of a monster unless it was forced upon them?

But Shizuo's rejection was met differently to the raven. Izaya's hand tightened around Shizuo's as he realized…he was clearly rejected. Swallowing hard, and with pain clawing at his own gut as he stared at Shizuo with an barely held together expression.

' _Ah…._ ' Izaya thought to himself.

_'So I can't have that anymore.'_

The thought made Izaya's barely mended heart; shatter once more, embarrassment settling coldly in his gut before the raven was able to piece back together some of his previous facade to made light of the situation. "Not even a bite, Shizu-chan? How cruel~" Izaya chuckled as if to mask his disappointment while the truth was, Izaya's world had been ripped apart brutally, his chest forcefully clawed up and his heart torn and then stomped on. Izaya should have known not to trust his heart to Shizuo yet again, he had…and again, that trust was betrayed, leaving his heart shattering once more.

Shizuo let out a breathy noise that sounded almost like a bitter chuckle escaping his lips at that. "A bite would be better." The blond murmured, leaning in with closed eyes to rest his forehead against Izaya's. "Who kisses a monster after all?"

"What kind of monster likes missionary position?" Izaya twitched his hips, slamming them back down to remind Shizuo to move least they be trapped here for the rest of the evening. But the words more than the movement caused Shizuo to flinch.

Without realizing it, a different red other than lust filled Shizuo's face, his slight embarrassment at realizing he was reverting back to the days in which their problems were more minuscule than they are now; having temporarily overpowered his anger enough to get them into this position.

"I just…"

Shizuo blurted the words out before he could stop himself.

"Like watching you."

Sex had always been the one time that Shizuo was able to pull aside Izaya's masks.

And this time had been no different.

Even now at those words Izaya's eyes widened honestly then softened at Shizuo's sweet and gentle confession. But his crimson eyes hardened again as the fact that Shizuo still refused to kiss him remained at the forefront of his mind.

"What's this? The monster has a fetish for human voyeurism?" Izaya laughed mockingly. "Funny. Well I don't want to see your face. It's almost a cruel torture." That part was true. He hated how Shizuo looked at him. It confused his heart. It confused his hopes. His heart kept mending itself whenever Shizuo seemed to give him another chance only to be ripped apart again so easily. He was tired of being in pain emotionally.

"But you want me to kiss you?"

Embarrassed, Shizuo's words bit back, his hands tightening their hold upon Izaya's waist as he began to thrust roughly again. "Almost haaa….contradictory, isn't it?"

Distracted by the sudden thrusts, all Izaya could do was cuss silently to himself at the momentary weakness he had felt. His broken heart hurt even worse now and it felt harder to hold back the tears as Shizuo's cock tore into him.

"Only so I can spit on you, Shiz... ah!"

Shizuo could see Izaya freezing up under him at his earlier words, almost out of some kind of fear before the raven's body began to respond to his thrusts. Confused, the blonde held Izaya's hips and began to pick up speed.

He hadn't...caught Izaya had he? In a lie?

Izaya couldn't have enough feelings for him to really want that kiss...right?

Almost instantly Shizuo's mind put a barrier up, blocking out the possibility at this exchange meaning anything more than it did. He couldn't afford to make another mistake in trusting that Izaya actually loved him. Not when this flea could blackmail him easily and break him apart for amusement.

Shizuo's hips snapped back and forth automatically as the blond allowed his body to become numb to all but the feelings of pleasure that continually crashed over him with each thrust. He couldn't allow thoughts such as Izaya still liking him to derail the blond. At this moment Shizuo would have gladly taken the lies over the truth.

"Aaahn! Aaahn…! F-fuck, Shizu! Aaaah! Haaah! Nnngh…!"

Izaya shuddered as his body was forcefully rocked back and forth and his ass pummeled. He raised his arms to hide his face as Shizuo rode him hard. It was as if a train was wrecking his body as his back was scratched up hard against the rough surfaces of the wall behind him. Writhing and shuddering, the male was unable to think save for the blinding pleasure that refused anything else less than complete submission to ecstasy.

"Aaahnngh! Aaahnn..! Haaa… I…! S-Shizu… I…!"

All too soon, Izaya felt his climax building up and within seconds the raven was crying out loudly as his body stiffened, muscles clamping around Shizuo's cock as he came hard between them.

Shizuo's own beastly growls echoed slightly through the alley as his head fell forward and he rammed as hard and as deep as he can into Izaya's frail body. His own frame shook, sweat mingling upon his face and chest - causing his blond hair and clothes alike to uncomfortably stick to him.

But its not upon this feeling that Shizuo focuses on. No, instead all he can focus on is that familiar sensation. The way Izaya's muscles fought against his cock and yet succumb to his strength. The way Izaya's body writhed under him, causing Shizuo to want to drive in faster, wanting to push the raven so hard that he could very well break the male. He wanted to imprint his mark inside and out of this flea and remind him once more, he was ' _his_ ' forever.

When his orgasm finally swept over him, all Shizuo could do was allow himself to be carried over into the transcendental feeling. To allow his cum to once more fill that bottom as much as it can before leaking out onto pale thighs now covered in his own saliva and bitemarks.

It was almost painful how right everything felt in that moment. As if the universe was restored to its rightful position for that specific moment. As if Shizuo's body had missed it, had missed him, but had had that longing for Izaya drowned out by the voice of jealousy and hatred that had become Shizuo's sole guiding force in this bizarre relationship of theirs.

Shuddering, it was then that Shizuo froze as a cold, realization began to wash across him.

Before he had even realized it, the blond had regressed.

Heart clenching, Shizuo quickly pulled out of Izaya, letting the male find his own balance as Shizuo hastily and none too gently peeled the raven off of him.

He needed to go.

He needed to get away from Izaya again or else he risked making the same mistakes he had made in high school.

He could see that now.

And, truth be told, Shizuo was done dealing with the pain of being near the raven.

As he pulled up his pants Shizuo tugged a cigarette out of his front pocket before turning away.

It was time to go.

Without a word to Izaya, Shizuo stumbled away, leaving the male there to his own thoughts and emotions as the blond lit his cigarette with shaking hands.

The sight of Shizuo moving away from him, however, cracked something in Izaya. Without warning the raven started laughing, the sound loud within the quiet of the alley and causing Shizuo's feet to pause. Turning around Shizuo fixed a glare upon the chuckling informant whose shaking legs didn't seem able to hold him up for much longer. However, not knowing what to say, Shizuo simply made a low sound of annoyance before quickly turning his back to retreat the way they had come from - Izaya's near maniacal laugh haunting him every step of the way.

It wasn't until Shizuo was well out of sight did Izaya finally calm down, the raven finally letting himself fall to sit upon the dirty ground. He laid there for awhile, too tired to move or even care as he stared in the direction Shizuo had left from until all his tears had dried. Then and only then did the informant finally turn to assess the damage to his clothes. His shirt and pants appeared to be ruined and even if he zipped his jacket up it wouldn't be enough to cover him on the trek home. Even if he waited until nightfall the streetlights would highlight how bare the male was as he tried to hurry back home.

Sighing, Izaya leaned his head back to look up at the sky, his heart numb from all the pain it had endured in such a short time. The question as to what to do now still lingered and every moment spent idle here only increased his chances of being found and possibly raped or mugged. The idea of going home in this manner didn't particularly appeal to him either which left him with only the question of if there was someone to call.

He thought of calling Namie, but he knew he'd regret letting her see him like this. The same went for Kida or even Saki.

Taking out his phone, Izaya scrolled idly through the list, trying to assess if there was anyone he could allow to see him like this who wouldn't laugh or blackmail him over it.

In the end, there was only one person.

With another heavy sighed, he called Delic.


	10. Chapter 10

 

 _"Love has two faces, one makes you alive and the other destroys you..."_ ―  Nourhan Mamdouh

 

* * *

 

The sound of the shower from the other side of the door sickened the host's heart. It swept like a disease, the water not cleansing the occupant, but instead spreading the dark feelings continually over him. Unable to bear hearing it any longer, Delic sighed and got up from the informant's bed. Staring at the door didn't solve anything after all.

Izaya had already told him where to find the first aid kit and Delic had grabbed it from the bathroom before the informant had stepped inside. He rummaged through it to see what was available. It was well stocked. Either Izaya had a very competent secretary or he must get hurt pretty often. Or it could be both, considering how the informant consistently flirted with dangerous and sensitive information and clients it would make sense. Still, Delic ran his fingers through his blond hair and sighed. He had no idea what he was supposed to do when Izaya got out. Calling for a doctor probably would have been better, but Izaya had said no. He had honestly planned to go home by himself just like that, but Delic wouldn't have any of it. He called for the taxi and helped him home instead.

Delic had been perplexed when he had received Izaya's text message that day in the middle of work. It had read, [Delic, I have a favor to ask you. Can you buy me any spare pants my size, and bring it to the alley between these two addresses?]

It wasn't like Orihara Izaya to ask for favors lightly. The first time was when Izaya had wanted to go to Lady Gozen, and...the other time was when he came to the club unannounced and broke apart. Considering that those were the only two times Izaya had ever asked for favors since Delic had met him face to face he was definitely worried when he received such an unusual request. It didn't even say when he needed them, but Delic requested for an emergency break from his boss saying he would make it up later somehow. He had then bought some black pants similar to the ones Izaya usually wore, the blond somehow deducing his size simply by his constant observation of Izaya's body. After that, with an anxious heart, Delic approached the alley.

However, the number one host of Tokyo was totally unprepared for the scene he was about to witness. At first, Delic hadn't been able to see much due to the shadows of the alley, but there was the informant, sitting on the floor and leaning against the corner between the wall and the dumpster - holding tightly onto his jacket and shivering.

"Izaya-san?" Delic rushed forward in disbelief before he quickly crouched to help the informant up as Izaya slowly blinked open his eyes.

"You're earlier than I thought," Izaya lightly smiled, but he pushed away Delic's helping hand. "Do you have it with you?"

"Yes...but why…?" Before Delic could finish his question, his eyes wandered below to view what he could of Izaya's bare legs from beneath the edges of the male's fur jacket. He could feel his heart sink as the worst fear settled within him and he hoped his suspicions were wrong.

But Izaya's next words only confirmed the worst.

"Can you just...leave the pants on the floor and leave?" Izaya asked tentatively.

"You know I won't do that…"

Izaya sighed, "I suppose not. Can you at least turn around?"

Delic handed the pants to Izaya. Unfortunately before he turned around the host caught sight of the wrist of the hand reaching for the pants and the terrible bruising besmirching it. Delic swallowed hard, his body frozen temporarily before he could force himself to turn around.

"Who was it?" Delic could barely contain his anger as his fist balled up.

"It's none of your business," was Izaya's short answer. Delic could hear the informant struggle to stand up before there was a clatter against the dumpster. So, Izaya's legs were weak...Delic's heart squeezed even tighter.

"Izaya!" Delic shouted, wanting to turn around and shake the stubborn and proud informant in that moment. It was the first time Delic had not used any honorifics.

"Please don't shout. I can hear just fine. You already know my job deals with all sorts of dangerous…"

"Don't lie to me. It was ' _him_ ' wasn't it?"

"..."

The silence answered Delic's question far better than Izaya's own words. It had been an assumption, one made spur of the moment from simply knowing who Izaya was but….there was no way anyone else would have been permitted to get close enough to Izaya to do this. No one else but _him_. Delic took a deep breath.

"What's his name?" The words were spoken quietly, but there had been murder dripping within his voice.

"Like I said, it's none of your- whaa!"

There was a loud clatter and that time Delic turned around just in time to catch Izaya before he dumped a trash bin on himself. It was then that the host had finally been able to take a better look at him, and Delic was beyond shocked.

Izaya's shirt had been ripped open down the middle and gave the host a clear view of all the bruises and bitemarks, some harsh enough to bleed. The raven had quickly covered himself up then and frowned.

"Don't look."

"Izaya-san, I…"

"I said, don't look!"

Delic had clenched his teeth while Izaya glared back. After few seconds, Izaya turned away and lowered his gaze. "Sorry, I should thank you. I didn't want you to get dirty and I'm pretty dirty right now-...aah? Delic-san?"

Izaya had frozen on the spot when the blond grabbed him and brought him in close for a tight embrace.

"You're not dirty, Izaya-san."

"...Well, I am right now. Physically and…"

"No, you're not dirty." Delic had spoken even more firmly to cut off Izaya from giving voice to such a terrible thought. "You're not dirty, Izaya-san."

Back then, Delic could feel Izaya's body begin to tremble a bit as the words sank in deeper. The sensation of it had caused a fresh wave of anger that was just barely held at bay thanks to the need Izaya had for company outweighing Delic's own selfish desires at revenge. Then, after a few seconds, a hand finally began to hesitantly wrap around Delic's back and finally Izaya started to hold onto him just a bit.

"You're gonna have to dry clean your suit you know…" Izaya closed his eyes and sighed, letting Delic hold his weight.

"That's alright." Delic's voice had been low, several heavy emotions coated over his tone as the blond's arms slipped further down Izaya's back so that Delic could pick him up bridal style.

"You really don't have to…" Izaya started again, but Delic had stopped him once more. "You're not a burden, Informant-san."

Once more Izaya sighed and let it go. He knew he wasn't in any condition to physically push away the host, and Delic probably would be stubborn about this anyway - being the perfect gentleman was part of who he was after all.

The taxi ride had been short after that, and Delic continued to insist on keeping his company when he helped Izaya up to his own room. Now that they were not in the dark alleyway anymore, he could see even more bruises as well as the fact that Izaya's lips were cracked with dried blood. It was all he could do to not punch a wall in anger as the realization of what Izaya had been through continued to cloud his mind.

Now here he was, waiting for Izaya to come out of that shower just so he could be bandaged up. Honestly, Delic had no idea how to prepare himself for this. He had taken off his soiled coat and rolled up his pinstriped sleeves while he waited for the informant to come out, but in the meantime all he could do was sit, reflect, and wonder. It wasn't the first time he had assisted a 'client' during one of the worst moments in their lives. He wasn't sure if it was by accident or due to something he had done in the past to secure such loyalty, but in those he attended to a certain amount of trust had grown.

The first time he had dealt with such a scenario….she had been dating the boy who did it at the time. When Delic had finally found her...words couldn't describe the grief she had suffered and would continue to suffer from that day onward. But the blond had done his best to attend to her, and to make sure the one who had caused such pain never would again.

However, this time was different. This time it wasn't just a client.

This time it was…

Delic sighed. Hands clenching into fists once more, he allowed his head to fall and buried it within his arms. Anger swelled within him like waves. Anger, worry, and resentment churned within the pit of his stomach - threatening to get rid of what little control he still possessed over himself.

But, perhaps worst of all…..the one feeling that held the others at bay and overpowered him in this moment was that of simple and utter _helplessness._  

For his part, Orihara Izaya had been taking his sweet time in the shower before he finally stepped out. He was not looking forward to this. He had calculated that Delic wouldn't leave without helping him, but even though he appreciated the gesture, it didn't mean that Izaya liked that he was going to have to show his vulnerable side like this to someone else. Not even Shizuo got to see him weak and Delic had already seen him cry once. With a deep sigh, Izaya finally cleaned himself the best he could and stepped out. He was wearing a towel up to his chest to cover as much as he could even if he knew eventually, he would have to bare himself open for the host. Still though, despite the towel Izaya felt more naked than if he had worn nothing as he stepped out of the bathroom, his hands tightly holding onto the towel around his chest. Izaya was wobbling when he leaned on the door, and Delic promptly leapt to help him steady himself. Of course the informant did not appreciate that he was being treated like a degenerate, especially given how he had, to some degree, wanted what had happened, but Izaya gritted his teeth and swallowed his pride.

Once Izaya was sitting on the bed, Delic sat next to him and quietly dragged the first aid kit closer. Delic could feel his heart breaking after realizing that one mark he had made on Izaya's neck was practically torn with a harsh bite. Izaya didn't even look up, his head hung in what had appeared to be shame to the host. Without saying a word, Delic carefully wrapped the bandage around the informant's neck and the trapezius muscle where the wound split open from the shower and bled again. Izaya flinched and hissed softly as Delic dabbed cotton swab with alcohol to clean the wound first before placing the cool pad and surgical tapes. There wasn't much Delic could do to the bruises on both of Izaya's wrists and the bandages probably didn't do much but he wrapped them anyway in the hope that Izaya wouldn't continue to use his wrists so much while typing and make them even more swollen. After Delic had done all he could do, he quietly tugged at the towel, indicating that Izaya should take it off.

Izaya bit his lower lip, obviously contemplating on whether or not he should allow Delic to see the damage, but he let the towel drop as Delic asked, his head turning to look away.

Delic inhaled sharply.

He had helped many women recover from abusive husbands, but this took the cake. The towel still covered up the informant's lower half but the bruises and bitemarks on the torso were beyond what Delic had imagined. Teeth gnashing down, the blond's hands lingered as once playful eyes glared at the markings with an anger that was quickly becoming tangible in the air around them.

"Does it hurt?"

"No." Izaya denied flatly.

"You're such a bad liar...there's no way this doesn't hurt, you know." Delic sighed as he dabbed the alcohol drenched cotton swab at one of the wounds. Izaya flinched.

"See, it does hurt."

"Well it's not a big deal. I've been through worse."

"Worse?!" Delic's voice rose sharply at that. Izaya bit this lips as he realized what he had just said.

"I-I didn't mean worse as in….never mind. I've been badly hurt before, this isn't all that much. Not all of them were...you know."

"...worse as in, other sexual assaults?" Delic blatantly answered for him as he dabbed the alcohol on another spot and watched Izaya flinch.

"...It's not what you think." Izaya looked away.

"I'm sure it's exactly what it looks like to me." Delic's eyes were filled with anger as he glared at the informant who refused to meet his gaze.

"...It's not. It's…complicated." Izaya sighed dejectedly.

Delic gritted his teeth as he finished bandaging up Izaya's chest and abdomen. Whoever did this to Izaya was obviously a jealous lover...he had gone over each and every one of Delic's love marks with brutish bites.

"The towel, Izaya-san." Delic spoke patiently next.

"..." Izaya obviously hesitated. Delic wasn't sure if this was due to the fact that Izaya had wanted privacy or that he didn't want Delic to see the more intimate wounds. However, Izaya 's fingers held onto the edge of the towel and removed it.

If Delic had thought that the marks on Izaya's chest were bad, the view of Izaya's once milky thighs made his stomach sick. A trembling thumb and index finger lightly brushed and rubbed on Izaya's inner thigh that was bruised purple in the shape of a grip. On one thigh was another bite mark now bleeding since the shower had opened up his wounds.

Who exactly was strong enough to leave such a deep imprint? To Delic, it looked too malicious, too possessive…whoever this jealous ex was.

"Don't look like that Delic-san, it's really not that bad."

Izaya's soft voice made Delic look up at the informant. He must have looked beyond concerned since the informant was trying his best to smile. "I asked for it."

"No one 'asks' to be abused, Izaya-san." Delic's shaky fingers finally start to wrap up Izaya's thighs.

"But, I did ask for it. I told him I wanted it…" Izaya didn't really want to explain himself since he didn't want Delic to know the details, but the host looked as if he was about to cry. And strangely, that stabbed at Izaya's heart with a guilt that he couldn't even explain.

"You know, all my clients who had abusive husbands and boyfriends, all said the exact same thing. That I deserve this, that I had asked for it. And that they had wanted it! But no one actually wants these things, it's always the other partner forcing their-"

"Delic-san."

"..."

Izaya's firm voice stopped Delic from his angry rant. Then the informant wrapped his arms around the host and pulled him close.

"I'm not like your other girls. It's true that for them, their boyfriends and husbands probably did trick them into thinking that they were at fault and they weren't the victim...but do I look like someone who could be so easily duped?"

Delic stared into Izaya's eyes and there was conviction there. A kind of a strength that none of his abused clients ever had.

"I'm not the victim, Delic. Possibly, I'm the one who ruined and ate him up. Like I said...I asked for it."

"...I don't... understand." Delic frowned slightly, for once believing in the possibility that perhaps there was something more than what he could see. He had just assumed that Izaya was raped once he saw the scene but...what was this informant planning?

"I didn't think you would." Izaya smiled softly as he closed his eyes and leaned his forehead against the host's.

"Then, you...planned it? Somehow? Why?" Delic had finished bandaging up Izaya by now and his arms wrapped around the informant's waist.

"Mmm...I guess….it's just complicated." Izaya sighed again as he then let Delic hold him. It was comforting to be held like this...even if it was wrong. If Delic knew that his 'ex' was Shizuo, his own cousin...who looked just like him, he probably wouldn't be doing any of this. Even if Izaya knew that, he just wanted to be spoiled a bit longer by this perfect knight. Yes, even Izaya had moments when he too just wanted to be comforted and spoiled after all.

"Explain it to me so I can understand then. I can't understand why anyone would 'want' to...go through what just happened. Unless you're a masochist." Delic laughed half heartedly at his joke.

"Mmm...maybe I am."

"Excuse me?"

"I said...maybe I am." Izaya opened his eyes as his head leaned on Delic's shoulder. "I probably don't know...any other way to show affection."

"...you're serious...aren't you…" It wasn't a question. It pained Delic's heart to know that this was probably the truth. From what he had gathered about Izaya's ex, he wasn't a good lover. Someone who didn't seem to know Izaya's sweet spots, someone who didn't take his time to give pleasure to him. Someone who had forced Izaya to give oral and even swallow when he didn't enjoy them. Someone who seemed to just crush away everything that Delic thought was precious and dear about the informant.

Which meant that Orihara Izaya probably never experienced the 'pleasure' during intercourse that was so normal to someone like Delic. All Orihara Izaya knew was the pain that came with it which eventually turned into pleasure. That realization struck Delic deeply and it hurt him physically to the core.

"Then let me show you." Delic lowered Izaya down to the bed as the informant's eyes widened. "That there are...other ways to show 'affection.'"


	11. Chapter 11

_“If love came easy, it wouldn't mean half so much.”_

― [ Beau North ](http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/14004186.Beau_North) , [ Longbourn's Songbird ](http://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/45188816)

 

* * *

  

“Delic-san...I…” Izaya swallowed as his breathing started to pick up. It wasn’t that he didn’t want it…in fact his body almost ached for it, had been craving it from Delic even despite his attachment and what had just happened with Shizuo.

But this was wrong, wasn’t it? If Delic ever found out that his ‘ex lover’ was Shizuo, he would feel betrayed or think that Izaya had used him as a substitute even if it wasn’t the case at all. Izaya saw Delic and Shizuo as separate people, it was just that it became complicated due to the fact that they were cousins and they looked like twins.

“Do you not want it?” Delic moved slightly away. Even if the informant denied that what had happened was assault, perhaps he was moving too fast considering the recent events.

“No!” Izaya hooked his arms around the host’s neck and pulled him back down. “That’s not it. It’s just…!” Izaya bit his lower lip and couldn’t finish his sentence. How could he explain that he didn’t want Delic to think that he was Shizuo’s substitute?

“I’ll be gentle.” Delic placed his forehead on Izaya’s and gazed into his eyes. He saw conflict there and inner turmoil. Something was stopping the informant from saying he wanted this and he had no idea what it was. It wasn’t that Izaya was afraid of the intimate exchange, that doesn’t seem to be the problem anymore, but the source seemed to be something deeper...and probably something also miniscule. Delic sighed and smiled, shaking his head. The informant may be complicated to read for some people and yet the man was so honest with his body language.

“And if you’re willing, I would like to show you that there’s more than one way...to show affection during sex, Izaya-san. It’s too sad that you just know ‘one’ way that only seems to leave a toll on your body.”

“Well… _nngh_ ….” Izaya shuddered as Delic lightly placed his lips on the bandaged neck, the exact area that Delic had once kissed and Shizuo had bitten off. “I just...wanted him to be possessive of me again….” Izaya admitted softly. “I wanted him to ‘want’ me again. For him to desire me...even if it meant to play up his jealousy. I just...wanted…”

Delic could hear Izaya’s voice choke up with tears just a bit as he continued to rain down light kisses on his neck, mouthing the skin where he could.

“There are other ways to show that apart from his way, Izaya-san. And, you’re attractive enough you know. Your body is naturally seductive...and desirable.”

“I don’t know about that…” Izaya choked on another laugh, before swallowing hard as he wiped a tear from his eyes to prevent it from falling. “I used to be afraid that he never truly loved me. I don’t even think he ever lusted after me either back then...so the only card I thought I could play was, if I could make him feel possessive over me when we dated. That would be enough for me. I wanted him to be possessive...I’m probably fucked up aren’t I?”

“No, I think...plenty of people would want their loved one to see them and only them. It’s natural. But….” Delic let his voice trailed off as his hands skimmed up the side of Izaya’s legs. Unconsciously, the touch sent a warmth through Izaya’s skin, tendrils of pleasure surprising him as the blond’s hands continued to move up to brush a bare patch of skin on the male’s hip. “There are better ways to show love.” Izaya’s breath caught in his throat at the look Delic flashed him. It wasn’t like the ones Shizuo used to give him. There was something insatiable there, but it wasn’t a hunger that threatened of impending pleasurable pain. Rather it was more like a promise.

A promise to make it so good the only ache Izaya would feel would be for more.

Biting down on his lip, Izaya hesitated before finally giving a small nod. Eyes squeezing closed, the raven tensed up briefly as Delic’s hand dipped lower on the male’s hip. With most of his more sensitive areas swaddled up in bandages, Izaya could only assume that this would be hard on the host - no matter how skilled he was. Delic probably needed to take his time to assess-

“Haa..!!”

Izaya’s hips lurched up as Delic’s mouth moved lower. Kissing along the male’s lower stomach, the blond had moved his hand to lift one of Izaya’s legs over his shoulder. Then, with little warning beyond another kiss, the blond began to lick and suck along the length of Izaya’s half hard cock. The sensation was what had jolted the informant and just when his hips moved up, Delic had slipped one hand beneath Izaya to help support him. Izaya covered his mouth so he couldn’t let a moan escape but it was plenty obvious that the informant’s body was melting away with pleasure. Eyes twinkling with mirth at how Izaya had fought to suppress his gasp, Delic took his time using only his mouth to work Izaya into full hardness. It was different, almost startlingly so, when compared to how Shizuo had done it. Delic’s tongue was just as good as his words implied. Continually he would coax precum from the tip, dragging out the delicious sensations of erotic pleasure before suddenly going slow again to allow Izaya a chance to regain his breath. Over and over the raven was brought to the brink of ecstasy, but rather than harshly stopping him from cumming as Shizuo might have done Delic instead softened his skills to give Izaya a chance to calm down.

It was almost maddening.

“D-Delic-san…” Izaya hadn’t noticed when his hands had moved up to grip the host’s blond hair. He couldn’t remember anything really beyond just how good it felt when Delic sucked him right th-there….shit….White clouded his mind, a haze of pleasure settling over the informant until finally Delic pulled away.

“Izaya-san...How does it feel?”

Delic’s voice was low. Or was it Shizuo’s? The timbre sounded too similar, but there was a purr within it that made Izaya remember who it was he was really with.

“You like it right here, right?” Delic’s free hand had replaced his mouth. In the haze, Izaya tried to open his eyes to see, but then the hand on his cock began to pump slowly, Delic’s thumb teasing the slit on his head in a way that made it difficult to breath. “If it feels good you should let me know.”

Sweat was beginning to cause the bandages to stick uncomfortably to Izaya’s skin. For a moment, as that voice continued to whisper in his ear, he couldn’t even remember why he had been holding back his moans. Was it so wrong not to moan? It felt good….It felt so good….

“Good...Delic-san….It f-feels  _nngh_...so good….” Izaya gasped again as drool threatened to drip from his lips. He was having a hard time holding it all in, his legs trembling with such intense pleasure. He tossed and turned a bit, panting hard, his toes curling as he tried not to come too soon. Delic’s breath washed over the skin of Izaya’s cheek before the blond’s teeth moved to gently nip at Izaya’s ear. The hand on his cock was still working the aching shaft, stroking slowly and squeezing the head with every pull. It dragged a low breath from Izaya’s lips, another moan fought down as the raven began to thrust in time with Delic’s hand.

“Wanna c-come...Delic-san.” It was hard to think. Hard to breathe. His cock ached with arousal but it felt too good. There was no pain. Only the pleasure of being attended to so devotedly, his cock worshipped religiously with each lick and sucking.

“I could help with that, if you’d like.” Delic’s voice was low and husky which only caused Izaya’s body to shudder more at that promise, his hands reaching out to hold onto something, anything that would keep him from losing what little was left of his sanity. They finally settled on the fabric of Delic’s shirt - holding him against Izaya as that hand began to speed up. Izaya’s lips ached with the need to be kissed, his heart pounded in his chest from the onslaught of desire, and his prick throbbed due to exaggerated arousal. Thinking, logic, keeping the upper hand - such things were forgotten as Izaya’s breathing quickened. His gasps grew to heavier breaths, his thrusting more frantic as Delic’s hand brought him closer and closer to the cusp.

“Delic-san...D-Delic…!” Izaya forced his eyes open, seeking the other’s face in the darkened room as his hands tightened on Delic’s shirt. He wanted to beg, he wanted to cry out. Instead all he could do was hold onto wrinkled fabric and toss his head against the pillow to drown his moan as slowly but surely the pleasure washed over him and ecstasy took over. Before he could even realize it his orgasm was upon him, hot thick cum squirting out over Delic’s hand and covering the informant’s stomach in steady, multiple spurts. His hips rocked with each wave of pleasure, his head thrown back as his body arched up until with a final soft gasp he collapsed into the blissful afterglow.

Gasping for breath, Izaya’s hand slowly loosened from Delic’s shirt. It had taken all of Izaya’s effort not to cry out with pleasure during his orgasm so for now, he laid there to catch his breath. He could hear the blond rummaging around, but for what he couldn’t tell. A moment later and the hand that had been beneath Izaya moved out so that he could pull Izaya’s other leg over his shoulder as well. Delic’s own breathing had also quickened, and Izaya could feel it against his skin as slowly the informant opened his eyes.

“I’m going to put a finger in, Izaya-san.”

Chest still heaving from the overwhelming orgasm, Izaya looked up at Delic with a fearful expression before he swallowed and steeled his face.

Even if Delic’s foreplay was better than Shizuo’s….there was no way he could make this not hurt, Izaya thought.

Head dropping back to the pillow, Izaya tensed up as he felt Delic’s finger encircle his entrance. Yet, despite Delic’s words, he did not thrust in yet. Instead he took his time there - lubing the area outside up and teasing the muscles with more promises of what was to come. As he did so, Delic’s head turned so that he could kiss the informant’s leg, not bothering to mark, but rather to distract until Izaya began to loosen up under him. It was only then did he finally push his first finger in, stopping just past the finger nail to feel and assess if the area was damaged or not after Izaya’s earlier sex. It surprised Izaya that the penetration didn’t hurt - even if it still felt uncomfortable- and even once Delic began to push the finger in deeper, there was no pain.

Moving his lips down, Delic began to kiss and suck on Izaya’s ankle, finding a nice sensitive spot there beside the bone that kept making the informant’s toes curl as the blond slowly stroked his finger along the smooth, warm walls inside of Izaya. Without realizing it, Izaya’s breath began to grow heavy again and impatience reared itself in the way he began to wiggle his hips to get the finger in deeper. Smiling against Izaya’s skin, Delic pulled the finger back before slowly pushing a second one inside. The lube made everything feel wet, and the blond took his time making sure Izaya was properly lubed and stretched to minimize the pain. It was a great relief to Delic that Izaya’s inside didn’t feel swollen or damaged. Izaya was also reacting properly with each rub and brush, it didn’t seem like he was in any pain. The informant’s face was flushed and his eyes half-lidded, it took a lot of effort for Delic to not take him right then and there. Izaya truly was very sexy and the informant seemed to not realize his own allure. Still, the host took his time and within minutes, a third finger was added and even a fourth until finally Delic pulled all of his fingers back out.

Moving his elbows back, Izaya propped himself up enough to look at Delic. The blond’s hair had become messy and his own eyes were heated with desire, but there was a restraint there that made Izaya’s heart do a small flip. Legs tightening briefly, Izaya leaned back down and grabbed the headboard as if to prepare himself for what was to come next.

But that only made Delic frown.

“Let that go.” Leaning forward, Delic used his free hand to remove Izaya’s hands from the headboard. Confused, the informant hesitated before glancing down to watch as Delic rolled a condom onto his own cock.

Ah….

If he wasn’t the same size as Shizuo, he was still large enough to hurt.

Swallowing hard, Izaya’s eyes glanced up at the headboard, clearly wanting to grab it again just so there was something he could pour his strength into when Delic finally began to fuck him. But from the glance Delic shot him it was clear the blond wasn’t going to let him so Izaya made do with gripping the pillow. After making sure the condom was secure and lubed up as well Delic finally leaned forward to tilt Izaya’s hips up. Grabbing one of Izaya’s extra pillows, the blond pushed it under the informant’s hips to help keep him elevated before he was reaching down to grab Izaya’s hands. Confused about both matters, Izaya shot Delic a look that was only answered with a grin as he squeezed the male’s hands in his.

“If you have to hold onto something, at least hold onto me.”

Delic could see Izaya’s eyes widen before lowering them subdued. The host licked his lower lip as he gazed down at the flushed informant, all bandaged up in white. It was rare to see such a cocky informant in such a vulnerable and submissive manner and he was sure that Izaya would kill him if Delic told him that he looked ravishing right now. But he did. Izaya had such an alluring body to begin with but to see him in such a state almost intensified the host’s desire. Delic never liked his partner to be in pain or hurt of course, but there was a certain appeal in knowing that not many had probably seen the usual proud informant in such a defenseless and exposed state and that was titillating for the host.

Leaning down, Delic brushed his lips against Izaya’s bandaged neck again before finally pushing his hips forward to bring his cock up against Izaya’s entrance. Fearful of the incoming pain though, Izaya tensed up again. His whole body stiffened, including the legs wrapped around Delic’s head. Recognizing this, Delic paused before he was bringing one hand down to brush against Izaya’s cock.

“Relax, Izaya-san.”

Biting at his lip, Izaya glanced up at Delic briefly as if wondering how such a thing were possible. But then Delic’s hand started moving and just remembering how good he was with it dragged a slow breath of gratitude from Izaya. Slowly, as pleasure began to flood his senses again, Izaya started to loosen up until finally Delic felt he was relaxed enough to thrust in.

And it….didn’t hurt.

Surprised, Izaya tightened up, dragging a hiss from Delic’s lips when those muscles clamped down on his cock. He was only halfway in, but it still felt better inside of Izaya than he had expected. Hand squeezing Delic’s, Izaya looked down towards his raised hips before meeting Delic’s lust-filled gaze. The blond was clearly battling with himself to keep from moving his cock inside of Izaya and before a distraction came in the way he began to rub at the head of Izaya’s cock.

“I _ahh_ ….said to relax, Izaya-san.” Delic sounded almost amused as a gasp slipped from Izaya’s lips and he was forced to lay back down. Soon Delic was able to fit the rest of himself inside, the blond’s sight wavering from the wet warmth of Izaya’s muscles, before he pulled back to begin a slow rhythm. The way the informant’s insides fit his cock like a tight glove and the velvety folds of his muscles seemed to never let go of him only made Delic want him even more now that he had a taste. Carefully he thrust inside of Izaya, taking his time to get the informant used to it before picking up speed. Rather than aiming for one spot, the blond was careful to explore - constantly thrusting in from different angles to see where Izaya liked it best before taking advantage of the best ones. Below him Izaya began to writhe, his hips rolling in time with Delic’s as he struggled valiantly to keep from moaning out. It eventually reached a point where he had to bite at his bottom lip - purposefully hurting himself just to interrupt the continual onslaught of pleasure soaking through his senses.

Until Delic brushed up against his prostate.

It wasn’t much, hardly a direct hit. But just having Delic’s thick cock nudge up against his prostate like that made Izaya white out. Gasping harshly, his body arched up as a second orgasm swept over him without warning. The sensation of it caused Delic’s hips to still as instead his hand took over stroking Izaya’s cock once more to drag every drop of pleasure out until finally Izaya went limp under him. Gasping for air, the raven felt as though he would never be able to move again as hot blinding pleasure continued to vibrate up his spine. Above him Delic was slowly pulling out, being careful not to move too fast and hurt Izaya as the male’s refractory period set in.

“Enjoyed that, Izaya-san?”

There was a pained edge to Delic’s voice that made Izaya crack his eyes back open. Sweat caused his shirt to stick to him and he kept one hand wrapped around his own as if to offset the pain of not yet coming. “What about you?” Surprised, Izaya sat up. Delic seemed to have a better endurance due to his own experiences and still had yet to come but the blond merely waved Izaya’s inquiries off. “I can take care of myself.”

Those words caused Izaya to scowl as he watched Delic peel the condom off so that he could start stroking himself. The male moved to sit on the edge of the bed, his hand working quickly as though it really was beginning to hurt that he had yet to cum. The sight made Izaya annoyed, his pride clearly on the line given that he had been unable to make Delic cum while he had already come twice. Despite how tired he felt, Izaya pushed up. Unhappily he shoved Delic’s hand away and crawled into his lap.

“I can keep going.”

Delic looked surprised at the sudden aggression, the host hesitating briefly. “It’ll hurt if you continue, Izaya-san. Don’t worry about m-” Hand moving down, Izaya roughly grabbed Delic’s cock - eliciting a groan so tinged with pleasure that the raven couldn’t help but feel a little sadistic pride in causing it.

“I said, I can keep going De-lic-san~” Grinning now, Izaya moved his hips so that he could angle Delic’s cock just right before he sank down roughly. Gasping as he was filled once more with the thick, throbbing cock, Izaya paused just long enough to grow used to it again as his hands moved to wrap around Delic’s neck.

“F-Fuck….” The small cuss from Delic filled Izaya with glee as he tightened up his muscles around the blond’s cock. “You like this, don’t you Host-san?” Amusement laced Izaya’s voice as he began to slowly bounce and roll his hips - letting Delic get a good feel of his inner muscles now that the condom was gone.

“Maybe you’re the masochist.” Izaya chuckled, his fingers toying with Delic’s hair as he began to speed up. His own cock began to react to the stimulus, growing harder and harder once more with every bounce of his hips. He couldn’t quite get the angle just right to get Delic to brush against his prostate again, but Izaya was unconcerned about that. What he enjoyed more was having the confident host unravel like this.

“Ahhh… _mnnngh_...aah….” Delic groaned deeply, his hands falling to Izaya’s hips to help the informant find a good rhythm to their fucking. It was hot. The blond had to admit it. It was fucking hot having Izaya take control like this. Arousal churned low in his gut, dripping like molten lead to fill him with pleasure on every roll of those damnable hips. It was like a chase as Izaya took control, forcing Delic to follow in pursuit. But he wasn’t prepared to lose. Not just yet.

Fingers tightening just enough to secure a grip, Delic changed the angle at which Izaya thrust  down. The difference was a small one, but it was just enough. On the next downward thrust his cock brushed up against the sensitive bundle of nerves and Izaya was caught off guard. Swiftly he buried his face in Delic’s shoulder, biting down into the cloth of the blond’s shirt to fight off the ensuing moan. Izaya’s cock throbbed between them, good and ready for another fuck as the precum smearing all over the front of Delic’s shirt with their quickening pace.. Soon Delic was meeting Izaya’s thrusts, the informant fully mounted as Delic’s hips pushed up to sink his cock in deeper until all too soon Izaya felt his orgasm hitting him. This time there wasn’t as much cum, yet it still left the informant breathless. His muscles clamped down on Delic and this time the blond completely fell apart.

Swiftly Delic turned them over, forcing Izaya to fall onto the bed with a surprised gasp as he abruptly pulled out. Shuddering, the blond barely managed before he was cumming hard - his one relief being that he at least managed to only cum on Izaya rather than in him. Strangely, it made Izaya’s orgasm feel incomplete as Shizuo had always came inside him. That throbbing cock along with the hot jets of cum filling his inside always made Izaya feel so satisfied….but he understood why Delic had pulled out. Ever the perfect gentleman, even in the throes of pleasure.

Izaya groaned as he laid there panting, trying to catch his breath. Already, Delic stopped basking in the afterglow as he got up to grab the towel, discarding his own soiled shirt on the way, and helped wipe off the cum from Izaya’s bandaged body. Izaya watched quietly and as soon as Delic was done, he pulled the host back down on the bed. Delic lightly chuckled at the cute gesture as he laid back down and pulled up the informant up against him.

“Did you want an extra body pillow, Izaya-san?” Delic joked as he kissed Izaya’s forehead.

“I was getting cold.”

“Ah, so you needed me to warm you up some more. You sure have a lewd body, Izaya-san.”

“It’s natural to get cold after sweating so hard.” Izaya pouted as he actually snuggled closer to Delic’s immense surprise and pleasure.

“Izaya-san, if you spoil me this much, I’m going to want a bit more each time…” Delic admitted as he held him a bit tighter.

“Well, maybe I don’t mind spoiling you once in awhile...I do owe you a favor back.”

“...”

Delic fell silent on that and Izaya looked up confused. “I do take it...you want to be compensated?”

“I’m just a bit surprised...I thought that ‘this’...was…”

“Well, I wanted this one.” Izaya smirked coyly. “So I didn’t think it counted...unless I should?”

“No, no! I...I’m just…” Delic quickly refuted, rather surprised. He really had thought that...Izaya was letting him have his ‘way’ with Izaya’s body as compensation but...did Izaya actually...want it? The informant was still confusing as ever despite the fact that the host had been getting better at reading him. And it warmed Delic’s heart to know that Izaya truly did want...more… But if he didn’t, then this was one cunning human, Delic thought to himself. Because this informant was rapidly winning his heart and he was the king at winning hearts in Tokyo.

“Well in that case, I already have a favor in mind.” Delic made their foreheads touch again, enjoying the closeness and intimacy.

“Oh? What’s that?” Izaya tilted his head despite having their foreheads touching. He wasn’t sure what ‘more’ Delic could want besides sex. “Another round?”

“Ahahahaa….you think so little of me, that it hurts, Izaya-san.” Delic jested.

“But actually, I was thinking…” Delic opened his eyes as his smile faded. Izaya saw the seriousness in Delic’s fuchsia eyes and he too grew quiet as he prepared himself.

“Will you go out on a date with me, Izaya-san?  
  
“...”

“.........”

“........................Huh?” Izaya blinked then scowled, clearly confused. “Another date? That’s it?”

“No, well…a bit more then that.” Delic looked bemused by the informant’s confusion.

“What more is...more?”

“A bit more than last time.”

“Care to elaborate?” Izaya frowned a bit.

“How about...a lot of dates?”

“A lot of...you mean like...going out?”

“Something like that. I just don’t like that our ‘dates’ have strings attached with me providing you information in exchange. I want it to be more natural, a bit casual…” Delic made small circles on Izaya’s back. “I want to get to know you more, Izaya-san. I think I’m quite fond of you...and no other man or woman has done that in awhile.”

“...I still need…” Izaya hesitated.

“I’ll still provide the information you need, free of charge. But I also want our dates as much as our times allow.”

“That’s one large favor. In fact, that’s more than just ‘one’ favor, Delic-san.” Izaya pouted.

“Mmmm….is that a no?”

“Well...I like the idea that I can get unlimited resources with me just dating you once a week or so…” Izaya chuckled. Delic sighed theatrically. “So calculating. Is that all you’re thinking about, Izaya-san? The profit margin between you going on a date with me for information versus just dating and me giving you unlimited information?”

“Well, I’m certainly getting the better part of the deal you’re making.” Izaya smirked.

“Are you sure about that?” Delic grinned back and there was a hint of mischievousness in that smile. “Don’t get so cocky, Informant-san. My ‘dates’ will involve...a lot more intimacy now that we’ve...crossed some lines today.”

“....” Izaya stiffened ever so slightly as he frowned. “I still get to say no if I don’t want something.”

“I’m not a rapist, Izaya-san. Of course if you say no, I’ll always back down.” Delic agreed though he had a feeling Izaya wasn’t meaning the ‘sex’ part. Since….when Delic tried to stop mid-way, this man _rode_  him hard! Thinking about what just happened made his own cock twitch again. That moment was still hot and fresh in his mind.

“Did your cock just _twitch?!_ ” Izaya couldn’t help but laugh as he felt it brush against his legs. “Alright...it’s a deal. I don’t mind dating you casually...as long as my time allows it. Remember that I’m a busy guy, Host-san.”

“Don’t worry, I already have several photos of your secretary’s brother that she had asked for if I ever needed to make an emergency appointment.” Delic winked.

“Are you serious right now?!” Izaya’s jaw dropped and Delic couldn’t help but chuckle.

“Maybe.” Delic laughed as he kissed Izaya’s forehead. “Get some rest for now, Izaya-san. I think you need it after today.”

Izaya sighed and nodded, cuddling even closer to the blond. His arms and build were so similar to…. _his_. To Shizuo’s. Izaya couldn’t help but notice it even if he didn’t want to.

But it was with that small promise that Delic wouldn’t force anything on him again, and knowing that Izaya’s small secret was safe once more, Izaya felt as though he could relax. His moans were still locked away in a box, now the only thing that he had left to save for Shizuo along with his kisses.

Orihara Izaya still did not know why he was saving those last two things for the man he thought didn’t love him...who had told him just a few hours ago that he had never loved him. And yet, he couldn’t throw the key away as he kept them locked in his heart.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's Note: Thank you for all the reviews! But remember there's two authors for this fic! <3 Thanks again!


	12. Chapter 12

 

_ Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment _ .-- Buddha

 

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Delic placed a hand upon the back of Izaya’s chair, the host’s expression impatiently excited as he waited for his ‘date’ to condescend himself into turning his attention away from his oh-so-important computer and back towards the blond.  
  
“Informant-saaaaaaaaan!” Delic whined just a bit, his habit of calling Izaya by his formal title resurfacing in his impatience as his chin landed upon the top of Izaya’s head. 

“I’m starting to think I should be jealous over how much more attention you give to your computer than me.”

“You know I have a lot of work.” Izaya sighed, not once pausing from his typing even as he spoke to Delic. There were several large boxes in front of his desk, packages that arrived early and they needed to be categorized right away. Since the delivery was unexpected and Izaya had planned to have his first date with Delic that day, he did not ask Namie to come in that morning, which meant it was up to Izaya to quickly finish the job.  “I’ve told you that this is a rather time sensitive matter so, just be a bit more patient, Delic-san.” 

Delic mumbled something under his breath before sighing. “I also know you aren’t fully recovered. Are you even sleeping?”

Izaya shrugged. “When I need to.” 

“According to some unknown scientists, when you ‘need to’ is every night for at least 7 to 8 hours.”

“A human can live for few days without sleep. That and 2-4 hours of sleep a day is enough to recharge... although that doesn't mean that's my normal sleeping schedule of course.” Izaya was multi tasking as he quickly checked his emails. He had a random client who had also booked to come in for a rather ‘urgent’ matter he needed to discuss. Since Izaya was going to be stuck for a while categorizing the deliveries, he went ahead and told him to come in. That was thirty minutes ago. He should be arriving soon. “Now if you want to hang out with me, give me a bit of time to finish this up first.” 

Delic moved his chin so that he could cross his hands on top of Izaya’s head before leaning down again to place his chin on top of his hands.

“How about a compromise? I'll be nice and give you 30 more seconds before I drag you away from the computer rather than doing so now?”

“I have to _finish_ this and few other things, then you can have me all you want. So, stop interrupting me, so I can finish it faster.” Izaya frowned. He had to categorize this information and send it to Shiki. And if he found out that he couldn't get the information on time because his ‘date’ was pounding his ass.... well... Shiki would beat his ass for that as well.

Delic’s eyes slid down to the corner of Izaya’s computer screen, a subtle glance at the time located there before the host gave another dramatic sigh. “And after I worked so hard to finish my work in order to be here at the time I told you I would be.” A few more grumbles were made before Delic finally fell into silence. Clearly Izaya wasn't going to stop working no matter what the host said so he may as well let the informant finish before whisking him away.

When Delic whined like that, Izaya couldn’t help but smirk as he typed. “I'll be done soon, Delic-san. If you’re good, perhaps I’ll even give you a reward.”

“A reward?” Delic’s eyes shined as if that piqued his interest.  “Depends on the reward.”

“Oh please. By now I know what kind of ‘rewards’ you like and prefer, Delic-san.” Izaya scoffed, but he couldn’t help his smirk from turning teasing while his hands were kept busy. “I am an informant after all. It’s my job to be observant even if it’s also my hobby.”

“I like hearing that you’re observant of my interests, Izaya-san. Even if by now I get that you aren’t saying I’m anyone particularly special since you observe everyone else as well….” Delic circled back around to stand beside Izaya, wrapping his arms around his neck while placing his chin on top of the informant’s head. “So what else have you been ‘observing’ about me?”

“Not everything is flattering.” Izaya teased again before his smile faded, the informant concentrating harder now. 

“How about you just tell me the ‘flattering’ parts?”

Izaya couldn’t help but laugh as he felt Delic’s fingers caress his collar bones, traveling lower to go dipping under his shirt to stroke his smooth skin.

“Mmm… later. Right now I have to-”

“Concentrate on your work. Right….” Delic finished for him and sighed. He continued to teasingly stroke Izaya’s throat. From his angle, Delic could see how beautiful Izaya’s neckline was...and that v-neck shirt was teasing him for even better view. He couldn’t help but dip both his hands under the shirt and travel even lower, closer and closer to his prizes when….

“Delic….”

There was that sharp hiss the host knew was coming. 

“Yes sir. I’ll behave sir.” Delic pouted as he pulled his hands away. But Izaya must have felt it because… now the nipples were perky and made two small protruding bumps on the otherwise smooth shirt. Delic licked his lips. 

God how he wanted to fuck him right then and there on top of his work desk. Screw the paperwork, Delic wanted to mess him up and make him come so hard that every time Izaya sat on this chair to work, he could revisit that memory.  

Just as Delic was about to snap from his impatience and pounce on the informant, the doorbell rang. The host groaned inwardly as Izaya quickly got up to greet his client. Delic sighed as he watched his date greet someone else with a smile and gave them his undivided attention Delic had been waiting for an hour already. He was getting rather fed up of strangers taking Izaya’s time, but just as he was thinking of voicing his complaint Delic looked back at the empty seat….and he got a better idea. 

“Come on in, the place is a bit of a mess since we’ve just received some boxes for delivery but….” Izaya led the nervous looking salaryman to his conference table. He was also about to introduce him to Delic as his worker so he didn’t have to worry about privacy, but Izaya noticed that Delic had hidden himself somewhere. No matter, it was better this way. 

“So tell me, Inoue-san. You said something about how perhaps your wife was cheating on you?” Izaya gave him a professional smile as Mr. Inoue sat down on his couch with the nervous trembling hands he didn’t seem to know what to do with.    
  
“Yes, my wife! Y-you see… I think she might be cheating with my cousin! I-I don’t know what to do! They see each other every family gathering you know? I didn’t think much of it but…! We all went to the same high school together so we’re all good friends and…”

Izaya offered some tea to calm the man’s nerves and then sat back in his usual chair so he could do some quick search on this cousin of his….

….only to see that Delic was waving at him underneath his desk. 

Izaya took a sharp intake of breath. 

“Is something the matter?” Inoue looked up, confused when the informant froze and seemed to hesitate from sitting down. 

“Ah it’s nothing. Perhaps I should sit over…” Izaya tried to step away but Delic grabbed Izaya’s pants and pulled him down, forcing him to almost fall onto his chair.   
  
“Orihara-san?” Inoue frowned as Izaya toppled to his chair.

“Ah yes, sorry! I… just tripped, ahaha. How clumsy of me. Anyways. Do go on...about the man you seek? The one you believe is cheating with your wife?!”   


“Yes! That good for nothing bastard… I-I think they’ve been doing this for years. Years behind my back! I can’t believe they’ve been….” Inoue started to rant, his hands trembling more as he stammered angrily, spewing half nonsense and half fact that Izaya would have to decipher with some concentration to figure out which parts were genuinely facts and which were probably dramatization. However….Izaya peeked down at the grinning host under his desk. Normally the underneath of his desk would be in plain sight...but currently they were being covered by large boxes. 

Izaya hoped Delic wouldn’t try anything, but he was smarter than that. He _knew_ the host will try something. So he kicked Delic lightly in advance as a warning to behave. The host couldn’t help but snort quietly. 

“Then my wife! At first I didn’t think much of it...but! I kept finding things that aren’t mine. Not my pants… or my shirt!”

“Are you certain?” Izaya tried to ignore Delic as he asked, switching his monitor screen so he could start his search.  
  
“Yes! I swear I’m not losing my mind! They aren’t my sizes! It just makes no sense that-!”

Izaya let the man ramble since that was what clients tend to do, especially a loose nut like this one. 

That was when Delic made his first move as a playful hand rose up to unzip Izaya’s pants. The informant’s eyebrows shot up and he gave Delic a serious frown that said, ‘Don’t you dare’, but his ‘date’ only grinned back as the fingers didn’t stop until the zipper was all the way down. 

‘Goddamn it, Delic!’ Izaya hissed, infuriated with this perverted man. Sure not everyone’s perfect, but this one seriously was out of control when it came to being perverted and having an over the top libido.  Not to mention, the host had been slowly showing Izaya more and more kinky fetishes of his…

Delic obviously didn’t seem to mind as Izaya kicked at his face. Instead, the host grabbed Izaya’s ankle and pried his legs apart so he could get in between them. Now Izaya froze up instantly as he stared down at Delic’s devilish grin. This man….was serious! 

The host was indeed very serious. His gaze was lowered, eyes hooded seductively as he moistened his lips with his equally devious tongue before he started to lick over Izaya’s briefs. The informant took a sharp intake of breath. Izaya quickly glanced over at his client who was totally self absorbed with his story to even look over to see if Izaya was listening to him. 

“Delic…behave.” Izaya whispered, gritting through his teeth as he tried to push host’s head away with his hands. But Delic was far stronger, his hands gripping onto Izaya’s legs to keep them apart as his tongue firmly licked the hidden length again and again, forcing the informant to feel him. 

“Delic...no…don’t.” Izaya winced as he could feel his body heat up. It wasn’t that he didn’t want the advancement. There was a time and a place for these things! But Delic clearly thought this was the exact time and place for it as he started to mouth the wet briefs and suck on the growing bulge. Izaya wanted to moan and push himself deeply into Delic’s mouth, but he gritted his teeth and tried to concentrate. 

Inoue was looking at him again and with that glance Izaya was forced to pull his hands back up to his keyboard. There was a grin hidden on Delic’s lips that the informant could just barely make out in the shadow of his desk that made Izaya’s blood spike almost as much as the sensation of the blond suddenly sucking over his half hard cock.  

“Hnnngh…!!” Izaya couldn’t help but bit down his lips before he moaned. Still, a weird noise escaped his lips when Delic suddenly sucked his cock in such a delicious manner, sending jolts of pleasure straight down to his groin.    
  
“Orihara-san?” Inoue half stood up before Izaya held up his hand and waved at him to go ahead and sit back down.    
  
“Ah, sorry. I… stubbed my toe against the foot of my desk, haha…. How silly of me.“ Izaya hastily replied, trying to distract attention away from what was really going on under the table. The informant inwardly groaned as he could feel Delic’s mouth wrap around his now hard cock and continue to suck him up. He covered his mouth with his hand, trying to muffle his panting. His toes were curling up as Izaya knew it was pointless to try to stop the host when he was this persistent.

For his part, Delic knew he could now take his time in getting Izaya off, bbut the idea of lingering too long by teasing Izaya didn’t exactly appeal to Delic. If he took too long, Izaya might finish with the client before Delic could finish him off, and this race against time only encouraged him to try harder. 

Hands reaching up, he pulled Izaya’s cock free from his briefs. The warmth of his palm sent a light shiver down Izaya’s spine, the movement causing his legs to tremble under the table. Smiling, the blond leaned in to breath gently over the head before suddenly taking the entire length into his lips. Since he wasn’t at full length yet it made it easier for Delic to roll the cock within his mouth, his lips sucking along more pliable skin as he forced more blood to Izaya’s length when he pulled down along the shaft. 

Above him Izaya’s hands had frozen and judging from the fact he seemed incapable of speech, Delic knew it was taking all of Izaya’s power to restrain his groans.  The informant quickly stole a peek down to check on Delic. There was a faint blush on his cheeks and an inaudible murmur, as if Izaya was begging him, pleading with him, but it was unclear if he was telling him to stop or just slow down.

Lips still smiling from around Izaya’s cock, Delic pulled back with a lewd slurp. Moving his hand up, he gripped the shaft roughly and began to stroke evenly while his mouth fell to suck on one of Izaya’s testes. He licked at the heavy ball, testing the weight of it upon his tongue, before swallowing it as well while his hand began to pump faster. Izaya’s legs tightened around his sides, feet twitching as the male’s cock finally became hard within his palm. 

“Nnngh….!!!” Izaya gasped slightly, shivering hard, holding back his orgasm. The host….was so good. So good that Izaya almost wanted to give up and cry out with pleasure. Part of him wanted to just come, or just tell the client to go home so he could let Delic have his ways with him. However, the informant endured, just a bit longer. He refused to give in so easily.

Pulling back, Delic kept one hand on Izaya’s cock so that he could tease and rub at the head of it while his eyes moved up to look at Izaya. The male was stubbornly fixating his attention ahead of him, but now there was a light sheen of sweat upon his face accompanied by a tender shade of pink stretching from his cheeks down towards his neck. 

It was too bad the desk prevented him from seeing more. 

“Delic…”

Izaya attempted one last time, his eyes unable to look down for fear of what he would see. However before he could voice his complaints Delic was purring his own reply.

“Hush, Izaya-san.”

Then Delic leaned in. Sliding his hand closer to the base of his cock the blond dragged his tongue up the length. Izaya’s body shook under him, his knees now digging into Delic’s side. 

It was a grip that pleaded for the blond to continue just as much as he thought it should stop. 

Smile fading as he savored the taste of Izaya, the blond repeated the earlier motion with his tongue. This time though he paused to swirl at the head - coaxing out a few drops of pre-cum before dropping back down. There was a faint groan, audible only to Delic in the form of a sigh that Izaya gave from up above. 

Moving his hand away from Izaya’s cock, the blond trailed his nails down Izaya’s sensitive thighs towards his knees. Then just as Izaya was beginning to speak Delic forced Izaya’s legs to part wide for him while his lips sunk down to swallow Izaya completely. 

The cock twitched within his mouth - blood pulsating through the hardened length as above Izaya’s hands slammed down rather hard upon the desk. There were murmurs - questions of if Izaya had found something - but Delic ignored it in favor of dragging his mouth slowly up the shaft. He repeated the motion a few times and even gave a small purr when Izaya’s hips began to tilt unconsciously up towards him to try and make the erotic sensation last. What the two were talking about wasn’t any of his business right then. 

The only thing that mattered was the taste of Izaya upon his tongue. 

Carefully so as to not startle him, Delic lifted up Izaya’s legs. He dragged the male forward on his chair, forcing it to roll further under the desk as Delic placed the male’s knees over his shoulders. Tongue still moving he circled Izaya’s shaft once before drawing back to tease at the slit on his head - a sensation that caused Izaya’s body to rock with shivers - only to suddenly and quickly pick up the pace. 

Izaya’s legs kicked out against the desk as Delic used the new angle given to him to suck harder and faster. Delic hummed in pleasure, his now free hands moving down to palm his own hard cock through the fabric of his pants. His whole body ached. He wanted desperately to turn Izaya over - to spread his cheeks apart and eat him out right there in front of his client. He wanted to force them to watch as Izaya crumbled below Delic before begging for the host to put his cock inside of him. 

He wanted to show to everyone, and to no one in particular, who it was that Izaya had chosen.

The thought made Delic hum, his hands unzipping his pants to pull his heavy cock out from his pants as he sunk his cheeks in and gave Izaya a harsh suck. Izaya’s chest was heaving, precum squirting out of his cock in steady spurts to layer the back of Delic’s throat as his toes and legs shivered in ill disguised need. It made Delic groan, his hand working his own cock almost feverishly in his lust. 

The raven’s body wanted, no,  _ needed _ , to thrust up. He could sense it. The desire that Izaya wasn’t  quite able to repress to bury himself in Delic’s mouth. The informant wanted to slam in and it was only the desk that now kept him from doing it - more so than the watchful client. And fuck, Delic wanted him to as well. Hand slipping in the precum which was now making it easier to move his own hand Delic groaned. The blond’s eyes were now closed, a rush of pleasure spiking in his blood as the sound vibrated along the length. Izaya’s thighs tightened around Delic’s head, his grip strong as suddenly the pleasure overwhelmed him. 

The sound Izaya gave was somewhere between a sigh and a whimper when his body finally stiffened. Cum shot out of his cock, filling Delic’s mouth and forcing the blond to swallow least he choke upon the thick release. He drank it all up, his hand twisting and pumping his own cock even harder until finally his own orgasm was able to hit the host as well. Luckily with his mouth so full Delic’s groan was stifled and he retained enough of a mind to move his hands so as to catch the cum before it could get all over his suit and the floor. 

Eyes hazy, the blond finally pulled back down with a small sigh, his head falling to rest on the back of the desk as he lowered Izaya’s legs back down. Pleasure lingered in his body, a humming of bliss filling his limbs as he took the chance to rest. Above him Izaya could be heard talking - his hands hastily trying to stuff himself back in his pants as Inoue drew close to the desk. It made a tired smile draw to Delic’s face as he waited for Izaya to wrap things up. 

At least now, after all that, he could afford a little patience.

Luckily, It didn’t take long before Izaya was able to convince Inoue to leave after that. Once the door was closed and his client left, Izaya drooped down from his chair, cold with sweat. 

“Delic...san…” Izaya glared downwards with a small frown. However, the effect was lost with that small pout in the corner of his lips that just made him far more adorable to the host. 

“Ah, sorry, sorry. But… you enjoyed it, didn’t you?” Delic couldn’t help but smile as he looked up at his new lover with his puppy dog eyes. It always worked on his clients.

Izaya burst into laughter and shook his head. If this was Izaya from months ago, he would have been furious. But by now, Izaya was getting used to having someone like Delic around. Certainly, dating Delic wasn’t always going to be sweet roses and Izaya expected that. Still, Delic was far better choice for company than… a certain blond debt collector in Izaya’s mind.

So instead of being angry, Izaya stared down softly at Delic and said, “yeah… that was nice. But don’t do it so often, Delic-san.”

Something...throbbed inside the host then. Like an unknown flower blooming. However, Delic was too excited by Izaya’s smile to notice that small blossom in his heart. 

“I won’t… only when I think you need it. You seriously need more rest, you know. How about we take it easy tonight? A nice relaxing dinner...and maybe a bath?”

“A bath?” Izaya snorted. “I trust you plan on doing something rather naughty?”

“It wouldn’t be me otherwise, would it?” Delic slowly got up from underneath the desk and leaned forward to lightly kiss the informant’s forehead as he wrapped his arms around him. 

“Or… I can take you upstairs right now and call it a night?”

  
“Oh, no. Not falling for that one.” Izaya pushed Delic away and struggled to stand. The host quickly grabbed the informant and helped him up. 

 

“Here, let me.”   
  
Knowing that the host wouldn’t have it any other way, Izaya leaned against the desk for support as Delic helped him with fix his pants before straightening up his shirt and getting his coat.

“Should I carry you?”

“And have you carry me straight to a love hotel? No thanks. Let’s go.”

And with that, the two voices faded away into the distance, the door to a now empty suite closing behind them.

  
  
  


* * *

 

 

“Hm? And what did your little kitten say after that?” 

As Delic’s recital of how his date with Izaya started trailed off in thought, a new voice cut through the contemplative silence. The girl it belonged to grinned as she puffed her cigarette between her dainty fingers while dangling her well shaped legs in the air. She looked up at Delic dreamily, quite enjoying the afterglow while she rested on the hotel’s fluffy pillow and satin sheets.    
  
Delic, who had just hopped out of the shower and was drying himself, grinned at the prompting to continue his story. 

“Mmm~ I think he would have given me another round if I had  _ really _  insisted on the bedroom over our date.” The number one Tokyo host smirked while he finished toweling himself up and gathered his pants that had gotten thrown carelessly to the side while they were having fun an hour ago. 

“Oh really?” She chuckled, shaking her head. “Why didn’t you ask for more since you love that cat so much?”

“I didn’t want to tire him, we still had a date after all and I had reservations. Besides, I don’t usually sleep with the same person more than once per night.” Delic shrugged it off casually. “You never know if they might get too tired of you. It’s nice if they want to come back for more, don’t you think? Besides, I don’t think he has that kind of sex drive to keep up with me for so long.”

“Looks like I still have a few tricks left to teach you, after all.” The woman in elaborate lingerie finally sat up to extinguish her cigarette into the ash tray. “You can always train him to keep up with you, you know.”

“Oh I’m doing that.” Delic lewdly winked at the hostess. “You’ve taught me that plenty over the years. Beside that though, I thought I showed you a few new moves tonight?”

“You wish.” The girl chuckled in amusement at the surprised look Delic tossed her. “But it did feel good. Far better than that politician I have to meet tonight will be able to do.” The escort, Velvet, sighed as she stood up. Delic was already tying his tie in front of the mirror so she moved behind him to start fixing it for him - mostly out of a kind gesture. 

“Is he that bad?” Delic asked only to add with a sly wink, “or am I just that good?”

Velvet chuckled again, her smooth, mature voice one that Delic had grown to appreciate over the years. Velvet was much younger when they had first met. At the time he was just starting off as a host while she - an escort - was his senior by a year or two more. However, what little seniority she had had been enough. She taught him all sorts of bedding skills he needed to please a woman, and the rest, Delic figured out on his own since he was a quick learner. She wasn’t the only one who had helped Delic, of course, and the host had plenty of connections from prostitutes to hostesses. But Velvet was one of the few that Delic trusted enough to share bits and pieces of his life and to sometimes even ask for advice. Of course, the sex was also good as both understood how they liked it and how to satisfy their needs before they had to face their own clients for the night. The best part about Velvet was that she kept everything strictly business with no personal attachments. She understood how to play the game.

“Mmm~ now don’t be cocky or you’ll get burned one day. Are you ready for your client?” She straightened his collars.

“I have to be. Lady Gozen will make sure I have given her my best before she ever lets me go.” Delic half chuckled as he shrugged on his suit.

“Her again? My, she adores you lately. Be careful with that one, she’s a snake.”

“She wouldn’t like that if she heard it.”

“She won’t be hiring me anytime soon, so it won’t happen.” Velvet rolled her eyes as she finished helping Delic. She paused as if she was deciding, then she spoke, “By the way, tonight, the usual?”

Delic’s eyes grew serious. “Time?”

“Mmm...3pm? Wait, make it 5pm.”

Delic’s eyes grew even more stern. “Who are you meeting tonight?”

"Better if you don’t know the name. I told Mama, so she knows too. I left the usual name and address in the sealed envelope and handed it to her. She’ll open it if I don’t return.” She shrugged it off. “He’s...gotten more aggressive lately. I think he recently watched some amateur indie videos. He’s been wanting to play with cages and whips…”

Delic took a sharp intake of breath at that. Velvet however smoothly smiled and brushed it off. “Don’t worry. So far, he knows not to leave marks or bruises. I do have a work life that requires me to maintain good health and a pretty face. He hasn’t done anything serious yet...but just in case. And we do have to go to a dinner party together with all the other politicians and skanks in the area.”

Between the hosts, prostitutes, and escorts do often with their clients, they always have to look out for each other. After all, the police would only slutshame them if they ever went to make a report. So those who operated in the fields would trade information as to which clients were good for sleeping with and which were going to hurt them. Among the ones that were rather dangerous, they would let one of their friends, ‘Mama’, or the owner of their club or management know to call and check in on them the next day. Though it wasn’t common amongst the escorts like Velvet it happened more often than not where suddenly they would disappear without a trace after meeting with their client. Some were sold into slavery while others were used for  more extreme sex that often involved their death. Velvet was a rather popular escort but still, men in power only sought her for beauty rather than her intelligent mind - treating her like a one night stand sex toy or prostitute - rather than for her unique service as an intelligent and amiable escort at elaborate dinner parties. 

Delic understood that Velvet was a well sought after woman, but it didn’t make him feel any better that she couldn’t say no to a high politician’s demands. He let out a soft sigh.  
  
“No, I’ll call you at 3pm to check up on you. If you don’t call me back by 5pm then....”

“Heh~ Worrywart. You’ll grow wrinkles at this rate.” She smiled as she smoothed out Delic’s forehead with her fingertip. “When I come back, tell me more about this stray cat you picked up. He sounds so cute, I’d like to meet him one day.” 

“Perhaps. But I don’t think I want to share him.” Delic allowed Velvet to change the subject to something more lighter.    


“Will he be alright knowing that you sleep around?”

Delic shrugged. “It’s my lifestyle. It’s not like we’re going steady or anything, it’s just the occasional date whenever he will give me time. Besides, all I want is to show him more about safe sex and that pleasure doesn’t always have to be so painful. You and I know to live our life to the fullest every day since we don’t know what’ll happen tomorrow...I just want him to enjoy his life a little more like that.”

“He sounds so straightlaced...I didn’t know you prefered that type. Just don’t fall in love with him okay?” This time she did look concerned.

“I’m not a child, Velvet.” Delic smiled as he kissed her forehead. “I’ve given up on such a notion many years ago.”

After Velvet helped him with his jacket, Delic stepped out of the love hotel, having paid for their stay in advance, and gave the escort at least two more hours to get ready. She probably didn’t need it, but Delic didn’t mind. He wished that whoever she will be meeting that night wouldn’t be a bastard and beat her, or he would have to do something about that.

Delic stepped out into the neon color-lit streets of Tokyo, a puff of breath forming around his mouth due to the chilly air. To many, Delic was probably a corrupt man, a social deviant and an adulterer. He slept with married women or women who already had steady boyfriends. As long as they wanted it, Delic would make himself available to show them the world of pleasure and depravity. To someone with strict moral values like Shizuo, Delic was probably disgusting as the host had a very loose idea about sex. He believed that pleasure was a good thing and as long as it was consensual, it didn’t matter who he shared this pleasure with, man or woman, taken or not. 

However, Delic too had a strict sense of justice - his own righteousness. Consent was important to him. Not only that, but he also believed in the purest sense of freedom. He himself did not want to be bound by anything or anyone. So the idea of him falling in love and being tied to one person was going against his own values. 

As long as there was pleasure and freedom, Delic was willing to fall deep into any depraved debauchery and see where it led. So every night, someone with a libido as high as Delic needed to sleep with approximately 3 people every few hours. Usually one or two was with a fellow host or hostess, or with an escort and sometimes even a prostitute who needed a good round of pleasure since their clients often didn’t care about what they wanted or needed. Then the rest of the night was spent with a person of Delic’s choosing, usually a client who paid Delic handsomely with lavishing gifts or connections. 

There was one rule Delic followed however, despite how many men or women he pleased every night. He never slept at their place nor they at his. After his service, Delic always made sure to leave as he never wanted to fall asleep in the same bed as the other. Sleeping with another person, actually _sleeping_ with them, was far too intimate of a gesture. It implied a sense of security, a sense of fondness between the two people ,and it gave them opportunity to see him in a state far too vulnerable to be comfortable for Delic. Sex was just sex. People could have sex with other people as many times as they wanted and never fall in love. 

But sleeping together. 

To be curled up against one another while each other’s bodies kept their lover warm. 

That was a recipe for disaster and Delic’s heart couldn’t take it again.  

There was a time when Delic wasn’t who he had become, of course. A time when a young boy had different dreams and hopes. A time when the young boy had dreamt of love, had fallen in love...and had had his heart shattered. A time when he was more innocent than he was now and less jaded by the cruel world. 

But even knowing where he had come from and why, Delic didn’t mind who he had become. He was perfectly satisfied with his life, giving his pleasure freely while being bound by no one. Sure, he wasn’t the ideal he had once dreamed of. But this life he had now was safe. He could protect his heart with far more ease now than he could before, while also fulfilling the hopes and wishes of those who had become jaded by the world around them as well. 

This static way of living as he waited for his own death to come was fine for Delic.

“Although, if I was to ever date someone seriously again, Izaya-san might not be a bad idea.” Delic thought to himself, half out of amusement, as he puffed a cigarette. Izaya already knew how many clients Delic slept with each night and that Izaya was just one of many. Delic had asked for casual dates after all, not a serious committed relationship and the host was pleasantly surprised that Izaya had agreed.  Even besides that, as an informant, not only was it Izaya’s job to know who Delic slept around with, but he had approached Delic exactly because he needed the skills that Delic used.  It was thanks to this that Delic able to show a new world to the informant, a world of pleasure instead of strings of pains from unrequited loves that the informant was surely too used to feeling. Delic only wanted to show that there was more to life than just pain.  And Izaya had accepted him and his lifestyle, something most people didn’t seem to understand, especially his cousin, Shizuo.

If he was to ever date someone, it would be best for it to be with someone who didn’t mind that Delic had a less traditional sense of ‘going out’ and didn’t mind a polygamy-sort of relationship. Izaya himself didn’t look like he was the jealous type and he was just a bit too workaholic - enough so that he’d probably understand Delic seeking to meet his needs elsewhere. In fact, Izaya might even push Delic to go sleep with someone else while he got some work done or watched his ‘humans’ out of a window. 

Delic couldn’t help but chuckle to himself before snuffing out his cigarette against the wall and tossing it in the trash. Pushing his thoughts aside, he flagged down a taxi and told the driver the address for Lady Gozen. 

He understood very well the dangers of falling in love. It was a danger that had made him decide he would become a host.  As the number one host in Tokyo he knew that would mean he would always be second in all women’s hearts, never their first, as that place belonged to their boyfriends, true lovers and husbands.

It had been a conscious decision on his part. A decision he had never swayed from. 

And it was with that thought in mind that Delic headed to his next client’s home.  
  
  


* * *

 

“It stinks….” Shizuo puffed at his own cigarette as he looked up at the grey sky above him. With so many bright neon lights, the true stars of the night sky could not shine through.  
  
“Shizuo-senpai?” Vorona turned around as she noticed that Shizuo had stopped following them. Tom too stopped and waited. 

“What’s wrong Shizuo?”

“Ah nothing….it’s just.” Shizuo scratched the back of his head. Something felt wrong. As if something he wasn’t going to like was already happening...and that something probably involved Izaya. Call it a gut feeling if you will, but his gut feelings were usually right. 

Not to mention, it had only been a week or so since the last time he saw Izaya...and that last time….when he…

Shizuo growled out a sigh as he threw his cigarette into the envelope he carried. It was already full with almost half a pack of cigarettes that he had smoked during that day. He was doing everything he could to stop thinking about Izaya. How Izaya had looked as he moaned. How he had begged with his moist kissable lips….and how for that one split second, his expression changed as if his heart was crushed when Shizuo denied him that simple kiss. 

But Izaya never had a heart, there was no way Shizuo had really seen such an expression, right?

Shizuo swallowed. It was best he forgot about it all. Cigarettes were not helping, but he couldn’t think of anything else to keep his mind off of things. 

“It’s nothing.” Shizuo replied simply as he moved to catch up with his co-workers. Falling into step with them, he walked beside Vorona and Tom and reminded himself that this was his place now. This job and this steady life that had become relatively peaceful and drama free.

A life without a complication like Izaya.

As Shizuo walked on, he had no idea that the gears of fates had truly already begun to turn for all three of them, slowly and surely converging to meet for a confrontation that was beyond their control. 

Unbeknownst to Izaya, Delic and Shizuo, this inevitable countdown initiated between them was ticking down the minutes left until all three of their mundane and peaceful lives would be thrown into chaos.  

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ruka: Omg FINALLY FINAAAALLY we're at the ... climax... next chapter.... the scene I've been DYING to write fufufu... is all I'll say. We're kinda both worried that the fans will think Delic is cheating on Izaya but he's not~ They aren't officially dating. It's just like those 'hey let's casually go out for lunch' but also slightly fuck buddies... kinda deal >.


	13. Chapter 13

_“The world doesn't change in front of your eyes, it changes behind your back_.”  ―  byTerry Hayes

 

* * *

 

 

Izaya felt nauseous by the time they came back to Delic’s place. The host offered his shoulder and Izaya allowed it. The informant barely drank at the club, a glass or two to maintain appearances, but between the pounding lights and the constant haze of smoke and drugs, the informant felt more than a little strung out. For once he was thankful for the company of a co-conspirator as during it all Delic was very good about making sure the drinks weren’t tampered with, as well as making sure everyone -even Izaya himself- were comfortable even while the informant continued working on his negotiations. Although he was more than capable of handling the whole affair on his own, Izaya couldn’t help but begin to understand the charm of having someone watch his back throughout it all. Especially considering how easily the target, a young woman and her frisky friends, became forthcoming in the information Izaya sought after Delic began to indiscreetly coerce her attention and affections with ease.

It was a bit fascinating really, watching the host at work even outside of work. After buying the ladies their first round, all it took were clever words and an handsome smile to convince them into allowing the drinks to continue pouring. And, as Izaya already had ascertained, the more alcohol consumed, the looser their lips became. By the time they had had plenty of ‘blue motherfuckers’ (a bizarre mixture of a drink that had a sharp smell which made Izaya instantly turn the proffered drink down), and several rounds of an ‘irish trash can’ (again, turned down), the lady and her friends gave Izaya more than enough information over what he needed. In fact, they were definitely willing to give more as heavily implied by the way one of them had crawled into Delic’s lap at some point.

“I’m going to take a shower.” Izaya touched his forehead as the headache continued to pound inside. He had enjoyed the slight show, and there was certainly nothing better than watching his beloved human’s sink into such surreptitious affairs, but now that it was all over he could feel the filth clinging to his skin like a sticky coat. Since Delic lived near the club, the offer to freshen up before returning to his own place seemed like an opportunity the more cleanly informant couldn’t pass up. After, of course, the host swore it was for no reason other than true altruism.

“Did you want to borrow something else to wear? If not I can wash your clothes as you shower.” Still maintaining an air of chivalry, Delic was careful to not jostle Izaya too much as he finally managed to unlock the door to his loft.

“Mmm… can you let me borrow something to wear while you wash them? I won’t take long in the shower.” Upon lifting his head and stepping inside, Izaya couldn’t help but take the opportunity to glance around even as he toed his shoes off near the door.  The place had an almost uninhabited air to it, as though it were only rarely used. Not to say that it was dusty or dirty, but rather untouched. It gave off the impression that Delic was rarely home. “I can find something. Just leave the door open for me and I’ll drop it off on the counter.” Although he said one thing, the grin on Delic’s face at the idea of going into the bathroom while Izaya was naked and showering said another. However, even as he jabbed Delic in the ribs for it, all that resulted was the blond laughing before taking over as the guide.

“Bathroom is upstairs, come on.” After glancing only briefly at the large window behind the sofa, the raven followed Delic up. The host was quick after that as he handed Izaya the things he needed, before dropping the informant off at the bathroom as he went to scavenge some clothes that might fit the much smaller male.

Izaya carefully folded his clothes as he took them off even if he knew they were going to be tossed into the laundry machine in few minutes. He left them by the door and closes it, although he doesn’t lock it. He was tempted to lock the door but… he doesn’t.

Delic’s place is modern and chic, the shower made out of glass. He stepped in and closed the door. The water warmed up instantly as it touched Izaya and he enjoyed the warmth as it washed over him.

Closing his eyes he wondered why he agreed to come here instead of going back home. When Delic suggested it after mentioning that his place wasn’t too far, Izaya just agreed easily. They have known each other for several months now. There’s a certain ease between them, some of the walls lowered although not completely down. They each enjoy their personal space and Izaya appreciated that as much as Delic seemed to reciprocate. Their ‘dates’ were getting longer and closer in between. It was almost like being in a relationship.

Almost. 

A bit closer to codependency than a relationship, Izaya decided after a moment of thought. Not quite yet as abusive and detrimental as the one he had with Shizuo.

Shizuo.

His thoughts now wander to the darker territory of his mind that he wished to avoid. He hadn’t seen Shizuo ever since that day. Granted, Izaya had not entered Ikebukuro since.

He shivered at the phantom pain that still haunted him. The shower felt colder than the actual temperature and Izaya finished up his shower quicker. He did not wish to walk down that memory lane right now.

Izaya noticed the sweatpants and pink shirt on the counter by the sink as he dried off. So...Delic did come inside the bathroom. Izaya hadn’t noticed.

He frowned a bit at the thought of Delic peeking in and seeing him through the steamy glass. He sighed. It was Delic, he should have expected that. Especially since not locking the door meant to the host that Izaya had pretty much invited him in. He should be glad that the host decided not to help him wash.

Then again, Delic’s too considerate for that.

Izaya mused as he tossed theories on what Delic was thinking while he stepped into the sweat pants. He scowled again at the length. It was the host’s, so it was clearly too long, the extra fabric pooling around his ankles. The tacky pink tshirt was also too big and kept slipping down one shoulder or down the middle. Izaya had a bad feeling that the host really wanted him in ‘boyfriend’ clothes for tonight.

He stepped out of the bathroom feeling refreshed at least.  “Delic?” Izaya called out when he doesn’t immediately see a stalker waiting for him. He smelled something rather delicious faintly tickling his nose and walked back downstairs.

In the kitchen area, he found the host with a plain pink apron on, his back turned as he was stirring the pot.

“Curry I’m guessing by the smell?” Izaya asked as he held onto his oversized pants. He pulled it up with one hand but it still dragged on the floor.  

“Being at places like that can work up an appetite. Would you like some?” Delic turned around to face the informant with a smile.

“I’d like some, thank you.” Izaya sat down on the bar stool facing Delic. His place was an open-concept flat so the only thing that separated the living room and the kitchen area was the long bar table. It was rather cool design and Izaya appreciated the color of the rose granite. Delic seemed to incorporate the color of pink and roses wherever he could it seemed.

“I’ll make sure not to make it too spicy for you.”

Before Izaya could answer, his stomach simply growled. He laughed a bit as he waited patiently. Once done, Delic placed the pot of curry in the middle with two bowls of rice to chow down.

“It’s… delicious.” Izaya admitted as he took a bite. And yes, he did feel the irony of saying that word, knowing that it was where Delic got his name from. Delic seemed to have the same line of thought as the smirk that crawled onto his face made the informant want to roll his eyes.

“After I left home, I didn’t get to eat home-cooked meals often.” Spoon tapping on the edge of his bowl, Delic looked down as if in thought. “I still don’t, but I wanted to learn for when I could.” Dipping his spoon into the rice, the host carefully added some curry before taking a bite. He was quiet after that, as if in thought, before grinning again. “I don’t get to cook for others often though.”

Curious as Delic seemed to be in a good mood, (at least enough to share some of his own personal information), Izaya leaned forward. “Your clients would love for you to though.”

The blond shrugged, his gaze lifting back up to meet Izaya’s. “My regulars know I can cook, but they would rather eat me instead.” The sudden brash words made Izaya all but choke on a spoonful of rice. Izaya shouldn’t be surprised by these teasing comments anymore, but he still was.

Coughing, and trying to ignore Delic’s humored chuckles, the raven quickly reached out for a glass of water. “Well, even if they asked, I’d prefer not to.” The host amended his previous statement as his amused gaze began to soften. “It’d feel too intimate.”

“...” Izaya doesn’t ask the silent question that hung in the air afterwards. He didn’t want to know the answer. Instead he focused on the food.  

“Well, I’ll go take my turn.” Delic pushed his chair and got up to shower. Izaya nodded and watched the host as he climbed the stairs. He quickly finished his food and placed the dishes in the empty dishwasher that also looked as if it was rarely used. But it was still functioning when Izaya turned it on.

When Izaya goes up the stairs, he could hear the shower still running. He knew what that meant; both of them taking turns to wash up and Delic inviting him to his studio. And Izaya knew that Delic did not actually have any sexual intercourse all day despite a lot of physical touching and flirting. He must be very worked up right now.

Izaya stared at the bed a bit and took a deep breath. He got into the soft sheets,curled up with a pillow and closed his eyes. He could still hear the running water through the door and the soft humming as Delic sang. It was that one song that Izaya sometimes overheard Delic sing from time to time. For a while he couldn’t help but listen, curious about the melancholic and lonely melody that Delic seemed to always have on his mind, even as the gentle humming and full stomach slowly pushed away the informants nausea from earlier.

When Delic finally came out, Izaya still pretended to be asleep mostly out of awkwardness. He was still a bit uncertain how to approach the topic when it came to ....sex. Mostly because Delic was so at ease and seemed to be able to see through Izaya’s bold facade while Izaya still struggled to understand what it meant to really be intimate. The host knew too much about him now to know when Izaya was bluffing, especially when it came to their intimacy.

“Izaya-san?” came a soft voice as Delic stepped into the room. However, Izaya didn’t reply. Instead he remained still, careful to keep his breathing steady as he listened to the host’s footsteps draw closer to check on him. Once beside the bed though, Delic paused, and although Izaya’s eyes weren’t open he could sense the surprise that Delic felt upon finding him asleep in his bed.

The bed dipped suddenly, a hand pressing down onto the mattress near Izaya’s stomach as Delic leaned in. “Sleep well, Izaya-san.” Izaya could smell the fresh shampoo and the dampness in the air as the host leaned over Izaya to grab at his covers. A moment later and the fabric was being settled over Izaya’s body before the host’s hand rose to brush the strands of Izaya’s hair back.

Izaya reeled internally.

But despite the internal conflict he kept quiet, breathing slowly and steadily even as his heart continued to pound within his chest.

He had wanted to see if Delic would take advantage of the situation. To see if Delic would prove his intentions with the whole night.

But just like another monster, Delic had done otherwise. He hadn’t even tried to take a kiss, which had been the most startling part of it all, as the blond man moved away from the bed and walked over to his closet to grab some clothes to change into so that he could head out again.

“Wait.”

Izaya pushed himself upwards from the bed. The sudden voice startled the host, who promptly dropped the pinstriped shirt he had been holding as he jolted in surprise. “You’re awake?” There was guilt in Delic’s voice, as though he had been caught doing something he wasn’t supposed to do.

Which, ironically enough, wasn’t true.

“Stay.” Izaya’s reply was simple as his darkened eyes settled upon the hosts pink hues but the one word held a stronger sentiment within it.

“You know...what you’re asking, don’t you, Izaya-san?” There was tension in the air between them, words unspoken but heavily implied as Delic remained by the closet as if certain that Izaya would change his mind.

“Yes.” This time it was Izaya who moved first as he pushed the covers off of him. With a newfound confidence he walked up to Delic, ignoring the startled expression on the other male’s face as he reached up to wrap his arms around the blond’s neck. “Tonight you’re mine still.”

“Aren’t we feeling possessive.” Delic chuckled, his arms encircling Izaya’s waist. A moment later and his larger hands were dipping low to grab at the informant’s bottom as he pulled the male up. Izaya needed no further prompting to wrap his legs around Delic’s body as the blond turned them to press the informant against the bedroom wall.

“Well… I thought that perhaps you deserve some reward.” It’s a feeble excuse and they both know it, but it was the only one Izaya had and it was something he could convince himself of later. “For all of your help earlier.”

Delic hummed, his lips already finding a spot on Izaya’s neck that sent a wave of warmth down Izaya’s spine as his fingers dug into his bottom. He paused there, suckling and biting at Izaya’s porcelain skin until a fresh bruise blossomed before kissing up towards the informant’s jaw. “That’s fine…” Delic’s hips rocked forward, rutting into the informant and eliciting a gasp from Izaya’s lips as Delic moved his hands up towards Izaya’s waist. “You were my first choice anyway.” The host’s voice sounded amused, his gaze darkening as he finally lifted his head to glance into Izaya’s face. The host clearly eyed the forbidden lips, wishing he could kiss them still. Izaya’s breath caught as his eyes searched those rose irises, wondering if Delic would break his promise and just give into temptation.

The host leaned forward as if he was about to steal a kiss… but instead kisses the corner, more his cheek before his tongue licked down to his jaw and sucked a small patch of skin there, groaning deeply as if he was in physical pain. Izaya’s heart started to pound faster. Did he want Delic to kiss him?

Izaya didn’t know. He didn’t particularly care anymore as Delic distracted him with the physical promise of another night full of only pleasure with no pain.

And this time, Izaya did not deny him anything.

 

 

* * *

 

 

For Delic, last night was a clear indication that there was a small shift in the wind and that slowly Izaya was beginning to open up to him more. It was just a minor change but something about the way Izaya had initiated the sex and even went along with every little push and whim Delic asked for made the host dwell on the meaning of it all the next day.

It was as if he had finally unlocked the first door within the labyrinth that was Izaya’s heart.

But Orihara Izaya’s heart had multiple locks requiring multiple keys and Delic couldn’t help but sigh just thinking about how long that would take.

“So I got the tape reel you asked for,” A voice spoke up, breaking Delic from his thoughts, as a woman with bright red lipstick giggled when she stopped in front of the blond to hand him a flash drive. “I can see why you wanted the security cam for that time on that location. It’s quite juicy. My husband said that he had thought of bringing it to the police, but his supervisor told him to delete it since they didn’t want any extra trouble. Luckily he kept a copy just in case the police _did_ demand it in case one of the guys sue.”

“Juicy you say?” Delic took the flash drive and pocketed it with a smile although his mind immediately wondered why police and court cases might be involved. But he could find that out by watching the tape later. For now he had other duties, such as rewarding his connection for pulling through on such short notice.

“Oh yes. Or rather very interesting.” The woman twirled her long fingers around Delic’s necktie and used her red nails to lightly scratch on top of his shirt like a feisty cat. “If you’re _ever_ interested in trying something public like that… do let me know.”

Although his smile did not touch his eyes, Delic did not give the woman a chance to notice it. Instead as she tugged down on his tie, the blond pressed forward, aligning her body against his while his lips sought hers out. She moaned, squirming happily at the attention, as her hands loosened from around his tie to wrap around Delic’s neck instead. She was just like all of his more upper middle class clients, beautiful and forgotten by husband’s that worked too hard for a promotion and cared too little. It was easy to distract her from what was going on around them, but Delic was too hard pressed to view the tape himself to linger for long. After about a minute he was finally pulling away, licking at his lips as if to chase the taste of her, before tossing her a smoldering smirk. “You’ll be the first, sweetheart.” Her laugh was girlish, like that of a high schooler discovering her first love more than a grown woman having an affair. But the happiness she radiated was the only kind that could come from someone remembering what it means to really live.

“Next appointment’s on me, so come visit me soon.” Delic’s smile softened as the two broke apart, the woman fixing her skirt which had risen from Delic’s knee between her thighs while he adjusted his tie. “You can tell me where you’d like to have fun like that then.” Was her cheeky reply as Delic guided her out of the alley, free hand on her hip before the one with the flash drive waved out to grab her a cab. But as the cab arrived the host pressed up against her once more, his lips against her ear as he all but purred, “Or you can tell me where you’d most enjoy it.” The client giggled again as the halted taxi finally gave them reason to break apart. With an unspoken promise between them, he kissed her hand briefly before allowing the cab to take the woman back to her daily, dismal life.

Leaving Delic all alone with the answer to many of his questions in hand.

The return to his apartment was the longest journey Delic had ever been through. The entire time the flash drive burned his hand, imprinting upon his flesh the anxieties and fears the blond had long been suppressing in regards to Izaya’s secrets. Even when he had tried to stop thinking about it, to shove the small piece of plastic and metal into his pocket it burned through his clothes and into his skin. He didn’t know what was on the tape, he didn’t know what he might find. All he knew of was the aftermath of what had happened to Izaya that day and that Izaya hadn’t wanted him to know even that.

He was probably breaking some kind of boundary between them, but the host couldn’t stop himself. He had known his client wouldn’t fail him, and that she would keep their business a secret between them.

It was just that now Delic needed to have the courage to see the darkness that Izaya hid.

When he arrived home the first thing Delic did was dust off his rarely used laptop. Without a desk, he placed it on his living room table and tried to ignore the anxiety twisting within him as he popped the device on. Sitting down on the couch, the host tapped idly at the seat cushions as he waited for the machine to finish logging in.

Throat feeling dry, Delic plugged the drive in - half expecting it to have a virus from Izaya himself that would cause his computer to combust - but finding with relief all that opened up was a window requesting which action to take. Using the finger pad, Delic selected the folder with the recording and finally opened up the grainy tape to play.

The company his client’s husband worked for must be very good because it was a decent visual. It even had some sound, albeit very poor sound. It was mainly just background sirens and a steady stream of empty alleyway. Delic started to fast forward and then quickly hit the pause button when he saw a blur. He went back to hit play only to be disappointed to see a man or a woman casually crossing the alley. He knew which ‘day’ it happened, just not the ‘time.’ So he sat there, fast forwarding anxiously and pausing each time he thought someone walked by.

He was about to press forward again when he saw another blur, this time the camera only caught the top of someone’s hair. Thinking not much of it, Delic thought to move forward when he quickly paused as another followed that person. Again the camera angle was not good enough to catch the person’s face at all. But that was someone chasing another person for sure. The host quickly rewound back and started to watch with normal speed and sound.

Someone with a darker hair ran past first, shadowed by another. They were off-screen when there was a loud clang, the sound similar to perhaps some metal stairs collapsing, followed by a crash. Delic wondered if this was it as he anxiously closed his fingers together and watched. They were talking, but he couldn’t make out what they were saying. There were more noises as if they were fighting, or someone was bashing the other against a trash can, but again it was all left up to Delic’s imagination.

_"WAKE UP!"_

The voice yelled loudly enough for the mic to finally pick it up, but Delic didn’t understand the conversation. However, what followed, he _did_ get.

_"Aaaah…!"_

_“...Let me go!"_

_"...Haaaaa…..Nnnnghh..."_

Delic felt a chill down his spine. Even though everything was off-screen, the moans were loud enough for the mic to pick up. The sound of skin rubbing raw against each other could be heard, brutally rough, through the now quiet alley.

_"Nnnnghh…! Aah!"_

_"Aaaahhh! Haaaahhh!"_

_"S-Shizu…! Nnngh… wait! S-sto…Haaahh!! No! Wait…!"_

Delic felt sicker and sicker as he realized he was probably hearing what he had already surmised had happened in that alley: a rape.

_“Haah! Haa-aahh! Hnnngh…!”_

_"Haaah… aaaahnnn…! Sh-Shizu, I c-can't….! I'm going to…!_ "

At this point Delic’s mind grew blank. He hoped that this was not Izaya. And that there would be a clear image of Izaya walking through this alleyway perfectly fine in the later part of this tape.  However knowing the state he had seen Izaya in that day, he knew that it was highly unlikely that would happen.

_"Aaah…! Aaahnngh…! Aaannn..! Haaahnn...S-Shizu... chan…Shizu-chan!"_

With a lurch Delic reached forward to pause the tape. His heart hammered in his chest, pounding against his ribs as if ready to break out as a fresh wave of horror began to settle into him. Suddenly he was in high school again, sitting out on a curb as a particular cousin vented at him about his school life. He was laughing as said cousin grew more and more angry over Delic’s mirth at the new nickname given to him by the one person he couldn’t stand.

Shizu-chan.

A nickname from a person Shizuo would grow to love, and a nickname from one that Shizuo would one day lose.

Anxiously Delic rubbed a hand down his face, trying in vain to not let the pieces line up as they were already beginning to within his mind. Wanting a distraction, wanting to prove to himself it wasn’t true the blond finally pressed play once more.

_"Aaahn! Aaahnn! Yes…! Aaahnn! There…! There…! I fucking love it there!"_

Delic’s breaths grew shallow, his chest heaving as he became unable to take in enough oxygen to keep from panicking. Moaning. The person was moaning.

They were enjoying it.

They were enjoying being...Delic couldn’t finish the thought. Desperately still he tried to run, tried to deny the truth of what was happening, of what had happened.

_"Aaahn! Aaahn…! F-fuck, Shizu! Aaaah! Haaah! Nnngh…!"_

The moans echoed in his head. The sound both unknown and familiar. Too unknown, too familiar. Shizu-chan….Shizuo….he was causing these moans. He was making the other person enjoy this...this barbarish _sex_ \- if it could be called that. Delic’s head began to spin, his eyes closing as though he wanted to block out the sound of the pleased moans even as they continued to echo within his head.

_"Aaahnngh! Aaahnn..! Haaa… I…! S-Shizu… I…!"_

Quiet.

Everything went quiet.

And in that quiet Delic could no longer run from the truth. He could no longer deny what had happened, and between who it had happened. His eyes opened, staring as a numbness swept through him as an all too familiar blond head in bartender suit walked by the camera again - his mannerisms agitated and confused before he vanished once more out of sight.

Hand shaking slightly Delic reached forward once more, forefinger pressing down onto the fast forward button before pausing as another figure entered the view of the camera.

Blond hair.

White suit.

Unable to watch what he already knew would happen Delic closed the lid of his laptop and buried his head into his hands.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author’s note:
> 
> Ruka: So sorry for the wait, but here's our climax!! Dun dun dun~ What will happen next?! Thank you for reviewing too! We love reading them!
> 
> Amee: Thank you everyone for your patience. I'm still struggling with a severe writer's block, but I wanted to give a special shout out to Gaelic who made the Tangled Threads 8tracks playlist again. One day I stumbled back onto it, and it gave me the motivation I needed to try and overcome the block to write this chapter. Thank you!! Without that playlist this chapter wouldn't have been possible. Once again, thanks everyone for your kind reviews and I hope the wait was worth it.


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